The faithful of Ohio were left contemplating a message from above this week after a bolt of lightning hit a 60 foot high statue of Jesus, reducing it to a smouldering steel skeleton. The King of Kings statue at the Solid Rock Church had previously stood 64 foot high, and 40 foot wide, making it something of a landmark for the …
Mine's the technicolour dream coat with the Dead Sea Scrolls in the pocket.
I can only presume God has got pissed off that people arn't constructing statues true to Jesus's image - a big black rastafarian woman.
".....a big black rastafarian woman."
You owe me a new monitor!
And which doofus didn't think to build a lightning conductor into the design? $700k and no bright spark thought of that? Damn, I really need to move into the oversized-religeous-icons field!
High-5 after a touchdown.
Same doofus that thinks that evolution needs to be banned from schools. Science was clearly not one of she/he's strong points and hopefully he didn't build any houses either.
What would it have taken to put in two lines of copper--one in each middle finger? Just think of the AWESOME photo op as lightning strikes the hand of Jesus, repeatedly over time no less AND next to a highway. Like a spiritual High-5 from father to son. LOL
Oh yes they did...
A perfectly functional lightning conductor was included in the design. They just had it labeled as "metal skeleton" on the plans, and the instant lightning hit it, it set everything ELSE on fire.
Some one needs to tell them that they just lost a six-storey high copy of a recycled statue of Jupiter.
Sounds like another ill-fated statue... one golden calf circa 1500BC, perhaps?
Well God sure showed them... again.
...note that the facades of Las Vegas casinos are constructed this way, stryofoam shapes with a thin coating.
However, these monuments to sin are protected by lightning rods.
Contrary to popular opinion, the pointy type lightning rods are NOT intended top attract lightning, but rather to stream electrons either into or out of the air, preventing voltage buildup.
The mushroom tipped type, on the other hand, are designed to accumulate a large charge and attract lightening, carrying it "safely" to ground. The big advantage of the domed tip is that rooftop workers are less likely to be skewered by them if they fall.
In a demonstration sponsored by the makers, they proved their mushroom design was superior, because lightning never hit the pointy ones!
“I think it’s a sign of the end of the world,” Paul Wright, told the Dayton Daily News “If lightning is going to strike God, then there’s no hope.”
Nope. It's called Physics!
Is that a lightening conductor in my pocket, or am I just plesae to see you?
Yep, this Paul Wright is not the sharpest tool in the shed.
The lightning hit a STATUE, not what ever God he claims to worship, or was he worshiping the idol that went up in flames and not the concept behind it? Maybe that was the message from "God".
Fire, cause a Burning bush was once seen as a visit from God.
Sweet flaming Jesus
Not really news
Ever since lightning conductors were fitted to church towers, Christians have (rightly) put their trust in science protecting their property, rather than relying on divine intervention. Like the joke about the guy who drowns in a flood saying "Jesus will save me" and refusing all help - Jesus says to him, "I sent you policemen, firemen and a lifeboat, what more did you want?"
Which is why Pastor Darlene Bishop is aces.
"Honey," she says, "it's just some fiberglass."
More like her and less like Pat Robertson, please...
I've never understood Christians. Even Christ spoke against idolatry.
Still, it's nice to see the big man getting back to the old ways.
..don't actually conduct lightning.
Mine's the one with the 11-Plus Physics book in the pocket.
So what do you think they do, does electricity flow through them or not? Why are they connected to an earth?
Re: Lightning conductors
Yes, the idea is that the lightning conductor forms a protective shield that is the same polarity as the storm above, so reducing the liklihood of a strike, but in case there is one, they are designed to take the instantaneous current without damage.
(Example, a negative cloud above repels the electrons in the lightning conductor, which leaves the lightning conductor positively charged. This then attracts negatively charged particles in the atmosphere above the conductor, giving a negatively charged "shield").
Handy to know should you want to recharge your Delorian.
The clue's in the name
Having read http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lightning_conductor, I now am an expert (obviously). OK I've only skimmed it, but I've not seen that theory expressed there.
Surely the clue's in the name Lightning Conductor - not Lightning Preventer, but conductor.
Or am I missing something?
You shall not make for yourself a graven image *
* Bootnote.Not 60 foot ones without a lightning conductors, that is.
The sermon at the wekend must have been about false idols and graven images followed by the collection.
Crap Jesus well and truly smited.
Well, as long as they didn't *worship* the graven image, I think they'll be fine...
It all depends on how you enumerate the 14-or-so rules which make up the "10" commandments.
*Worshipping* something else breaks one rule. Making a graven image breaks the very next one. Or perhaps the same one. Or perhaps not.
This kind of thing was a bone of contention between the early protestants and the Catholics (the early protestants shunning crucifixes in favor of crosses for exactly this reason).
End of world?
No. Obviously it's just some non-Christian deity's turn at the Lightning Bolt Which Smiteth The Unbeliever button this week.
Doesn't do to piss off Zeus
Maybe its a sign that America isn't hitting anyone hard enough these days?
C`mon America BOOYAH!
(Cue banjo music..)
but what would you put on the insurance form: Act of God, or "fillicide" ?
Maybe J has been acting up and Dad has him on his last warning or something...
" Get back there and have that second coming you promised "
" In a minute! Gonna level up on COD4 "
" Do as you're told! "
" No! You're not even my real Dad ! "
" Right, this is what you've got coming - and don't say you weren't warned, m'laddo !! "
*zap* etc etc
There is a god...
...and clearly his name is Thor.
Cue irrelevant ditty:
The thunder god went for a ride
Upon his favourite filly.
"I'm Thor!" he cried,
The horse replied:
"You forgot your thaddle, thilly!"
The big man works in mysterious ways?
Will the insurance pay out...
... or will they claim it was an Act of God...?
Um, it's been a while but
isn't there some passage in the Bible in which God supposedly forbids creating objects in His image ?
I really do seem to remember something about that.
@Um, it's been a while but
Not quite right,
Though shall not make false Idols of me. Exodus 20:2–17
So true idols are OK, then? Fine, I'll just dust off that rastafarian lady in the corner...
It makes a change
... from burning crosses....
Big Butter Jesus
Google for Heywood Banks' tribute song, Big Butter Jesus. Classic! And he had a new verse about the lightning almost immediately.
Big butter Jesus!
Sweet cream Jesus!
" ... The flameout has inevitably prompted wailing and gnashing of teeth as locals ponder why a bolt of electricity would choose to light on a six-storey high structure with a steel skeleton standing in a predominantly flat area.
“I think it’s a sign of the end of the world,” Paul Wright, told the Dayton Daily News “If lightning is going to strike God, then there’s no hope.” ... "
Oh how I laughed at that. (Does this mean I'm cruel and cynical?)
The lesson is
"The lesson is: Our God is vengeful! O spiteful one, show me who to smite and they shall be smoten!"
Larry Flint's Hustler Superstore is right across the freeway from the statue and it was perfectly fine after the storm. And no, I'm not kidding ... :)
20m high and made mostly of metal though?
... that God is a rotten shot. :)
(At last an entirely appropriate icon!)
I don't want to be a grammar nazi . . .
(or do I?)
"The King of Kings statue at the Solid Rock Church had previously stood 64 foot high, and 40 foot wide, making it something of a landmark for the town of Monroe."
When was the plural of foot deprecated? Did I miss the memo? Is this a Merkin thing?
Foot or feet
"foot" has also been an acceptable plural of "foot" when discussing length. Easiest (sort of) example is when talking about boats and referring to one as a "65 foot-er".
"feet" is also acceptable obviously.
plural of foot = foot or feet
When talking about foot as a measurement of length either foot or feet is correct, see
Weights and measures...
It's traditional for the singular to be used with weights and measures -- using the plural is a relative innovation, and there's still plenty of people who will describe something as "3 pound 95" rather than "3 pounds 95".
And there's certain measures that never take a plural after a number: dozens, hundreds, thousands, millions etc may exist, but 24 is "two dozen", 200 is "two hundred", and so on.
Funny how "purists" are just as likely to defend neologisms as anachronisms. The only logic behind "correct" English is that it's whatever the person doing the correction speaks....
it *IS* a sign
this is a sign from Gaia warning the delusional of the futility in worshiping false idols.
It's also worth noting...
...that due to the statue's having both arms (and index fingers) pointing skyward with its head slightly inclined, it was referred to colloquially as 'Touchdown Jesus', given its position's similarity to that taken by triumphant (American) football players.
You're sort of half-right...
...as it's the "touchdown" signal made by referees in American "football".
Lets all agree with the local inhabitants and encourage this act of God as the sign the end of the world is here......and God's starting the apocolypse in backwater USA. Convince them to move somewhere less evil where God's going to last....buy up the land and property really really cheap......
...........then flatten the lot and open a casino with hookers, and bullfighting.
Paris, because she's the closest to a hooker icon (and I'd pay to slap her boobies).
Everyone's a Critic
I live in Dayton, a little north of the statue, and my thought has always been: why would someone create a statue of Jesus that makes it look like he's drowning (the statue was of Jesus' upper body coming out of a pond, extending both arms to the sky, hence another nickname of "touchdown Jesus" for the statue).
My first thought upon hearing of the fire was that God must be an art critic.
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