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back to article Wannabe Jedi drool over potent laser 'lightsabre'

Those of you who fancy playing Star Wars or who have a currently unarmed shark knocking about the house might be interested in the Wicked Lasers Spyder III Pro Arctic - a real-life "lightsabre" capable of inflicting some serious damage: The Spyder III Pro Arctic The maker explains that it whipped the direct blue laser diode …

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A sense of relief

I was worried about the dangers of this thing at first. However, I then realised that the buyers would be sensible, rational people in need of an industrial laser for practical purposes and not a bunch of brain dead morons on a fast track to A&E and permanent retina damage.

Still, if we're looking for practical purposes, provided this thing is waterproof, it may have potential for the evil genius on a budget. Low power laser equipped dogfish, perhaps?

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Happy

The future is now..

Things that look slightly like metal penises with all buttons and that on them, and have, like, all light and shit shooting out the end? That gives me the horn something rotten.

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that can burn skin, cut through plastic and ignite matches

Strike a match and use it to burn skin, or even cut through thin plastic.

Much cheaper.

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Pffft!

Everyone knows that a REAL Jedi has to make his own lightsabre!

It's all fun and games until someone loses an eye.

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We need to know!

Is it waterproof? Can I buy a harness to fit it to my sharks?

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Horrendously dangerous?

Kitchen knives are horrendously dangerous,

Aluminium powder mixed with iron oxide (both readily available) are horrendously dangerous,

Motor vehicles are horrendously dangerous,

Ditto: power/hand tools, sticks, glassware, staircases, ... the list is endless.

Cool though, could put the death back in "death by powerpoint"

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Stop

Surely, no need to worry

If all budding Jedi run out to buy one of these they'll only use it for the power of good anyway. So there's nothing to worry about.

Of course, if they made one with a RED laser all hell would let loose.....

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Boffin

Oh, I can't wait...

Apparently it;s $197 +shipping and tax. That's a 1MW laser for less than a mid-range mobile phone.

Instant and irrecoverable retinal damage without eye protection, even from dispersed light, recommended optical density of 4.4+ (1/40000th brightness transmitted).

These should not be available on the internet.

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Flame

6 orders of magnitude....

Umm... its >>1 Watt << laser not a >>1MW<< laser slight difference between burn out your eyes and burn out your eyes through the back of your head and the engine block you're leaning against.

Given current battery technology I don't think you could have a hand portable unit capable of outputting 1,000,000 Js^-1 at all let alone without exploding due to shock...

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Hmmmm

"Gatso be-gone"? :) LOL

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Alert

sharks

Forget lightsabers, need to get some sharks for those fricken lasers!

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Unhappy

warning sign on japanese 1 Watt laser

truly, it said:

"do not stare into laser beam with remaining eye"

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FAIL

Not very dangerous after all...

Well, not unless you are an eye, that is. 1W is not going to set much of anything on fire, but would be seriously dangerous if shone in your eye.

Bah.

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I' match your fail and raise you another

1W of laser light will do plenty of damage to all manner of things, admittedly it would be even more narsty if it was UV, but still.

take a lok on youtube for the fun and games that can be had with conventional high power pointers, plenty of sparks and flames.

bootnote i still bear the scars acros my torso that came about when being a little less than careful with a 5W co2 medical laserm which was not a pleasant experience.

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Honesty in advertising

I think they should have a chat with Boeing about who has the most potent portable laser system.

Well, for a given value of portability, anyway.

Another gadget that should by definition not be sold to anyone who wishes to buy it.

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Gold badge

It can ignite matches...

But I can do that already, with just matches... That's sort of the point of the things.

I think I'll wait until the tech's a bit more mature, and Apple bring out the iZap - and then get one of those.

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My Christmas list just got another addition

"Under no circumstances should they be on sale on the internet."

Best advert ever.

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Stop

Realism?

Does it make the 'whoom-whoom' sound? After you've blinded your opponent, the sound will be the only sporting chance they have.

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Anonymous Coward

Pfffft, Lightsabre my arse....

1W - HAH!

Do they do a 2W version that they think is the fucking Death Star?

grumble.....

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No brainer

Make possession or importation of these dangerous items the same as importing a gun or having possession of a gun...simple.

If it is an offensive weapon, it should (and probably will) be subject to the same criminal codes as others.

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Grenade

My leg is twitching...

BAN THEM IMMEDIATELY! Or terrorists will be using them to bring down planes whilst pedophiles lure in children from miles around.

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Wannabe Jedi Knights Rejoice

Interesting tool for use in administering the compulsory frontal lobotomy that is required with a promotion to senior (or is that SENILE???) management.

Also, the perfect tool for use in `termination of said senior (or is that SENILE???) management in the event the company they run tanks.

We need a new icon, Off With The Head`.

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Terminator

This should be interesting......

Something tells me we're about to have a cleansing of the gene pool..........

I can't wait for the first twisted puppy to show this to his/her friends (ok, they probably don't have 'friends' per se, more a clump of equally friendless freaks brought together by some mysterious force normal people reflect away...)

Freak buddy #1 'Show me what it does'

Freak 'look, it burns skin...oww'

Freak buddy #2 'What can it do..'

Freak 'look, it burns skin...oww'

Freak buddy #3 'What's that for...'

Freak 'look, it burns skin...oww'

Freak buddy #4 'cool, a lightsaber, how powerful is it?'

Freak '*sob* I don't wanna show you......*sniffle*

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Stop

Umm, if they sell this to anyone for use as a weapon

*Are they aware that the use of lasers as blinding weapons is explicitly forbidden by the United Nations, thus the authorities in their country of origin should restrict their export, since they could be used as such:

http://www.un.org/millennium/law/xxvi-18-19.htm

*IANAL

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Oh dear

"Colton warned of potentially dire consequences if it was pointed at aircraft or car drivers."

So what's the first thing people are now going to do when they get one of these?

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So what's the first...

hopefully look down the end to see how it works.

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Grenade

Laser safety expert ?

since a 'laser safety expert' wants this banned, my order is in already

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Anonymous Coward

Weak

This is a 1 watt laser which is so weak it could only cut through a thin piece of cardboard after maybe 30 seconds.

When they start selling proper light industrial 20 - 40 watt lasers in hand held units like this I'll be a bit more concerned.

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Lasers

As someone who has stared into the business end of a 20 Watt Argon laser [1][2], I certainly don't want to be staring into this beast, even if it is only 1 Watt.

[1] Fortunately, the 20 Watt Argon laser was being wielded by a VERY talented ophthalmic surgeon. And, even 150 milliSecond pulses were enough to burn pits into my retina (Standard treatment for a detached retina now[3]). I've even got some nice retinal photographs that show the scaring (Looks sort of like a planet after a bout of phasering.).

But, trust me, you don't want that kind of scaring unless there's no other alternative.

[2] Which produces the most brilliant, most pure green light you can imagine, at

something like 1,000,000 times as bright as the sun.

[3] Yeah, the vitrectomy was cool, too. Look it up if you dare. ;-)

I seem to remember, though, that importation of such devices is restricted into the USA, due to rules from the FDA(?).

Dave

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Paris Hilton

Err...

Not 1000W, 100W. My bad.

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Boffin

Actually...

Check out unitednuclear.com and look under (I'm serious) "death ray parts". They sell 1000 watt lasers. And if that wasn't dangerous enough already, they're *invisible* CO2 lasers.

Okay, they're not exactly hand-held. But you could probably make a nice Ghost Busters style backpack setup.

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Jesus! you must be like garths big brother!

AFAIK the current state of the art in CO2 lasers run at about 20% efficient. so your 1kW backpack (and having seen a 600W co2 laser - about the size of 2 filing cabinets - back pack is pushing it somewhat) would need a 5kW supply. the thickness of the cables would severly limit 'portability' even if the 1000 odd kg of back pack didn't

:D

nice idea though

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Anonymous Coward

This isn't . . .

. . . the light sabre you're looking for! <finger gesture>

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Warning sticker needed

"Do not look into laser with remaining eye"

Anyway, surely it's not a lightsabre unless you can parry someone else's lightsabre with it. (Buzzy noises optional - after all, you can make the noises yourself, like Ewan Macgregor did.)

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The real reason

Of course, this product doesn't actually exist. All that happens is, whenever someone places an order for one, the government send "the boys" around to their house and remove their bollocks. It's really just a method of selecting those who should never be allowed to breed.

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FAIL

Bollocks?

<quote>All that happens is, whenever someone places an order for one, the government send "the boys" around to their house and remove their bollocks. It's really just a method of selecting those who should never be allowed to breed.</quote>

Maybe bollocks means something different on the other side of the pond, but in the US, we don't use bollocks to reproduce.

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Headmaster

The title is required, and must contain letters and/or digits.

Bollocks = testicles. Males can't reproduce without them.

So, tell me, what are bollocks in the US?

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Paris Hilton

If you don't use testicles...

WHAT the hell are you using?

Twain was right.

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Guaranteed-

To set nanny's drawers alight.

Truly a most elegant weapon...

Flames!

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Is it a weapon?

Because if it is, there must be a host of existing laws that it would fall under (sales, transport and possession). Then again, we live in a country that gets its panties in a bundle over kids having pen knives and yet sells fighter jets and other weapons to fascist dictatorships.

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When lightsabres are banned...

...only criminals will have lightsabres!

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Pah!

Where's my waterproof one with shark mounting attachment?

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Coat

"horrendously dangerous"? Yes, but...

... if you strike me down I shall become more powerful than you can possibly imagine.

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But will it blend?

Personally I'm waiting for one that will replace my chefs knife and not look like a silly movie prop.

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Like A Thousand Theater Screens Screaming Out At Once Then Being Silenced

Damn kids

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Stop

Operating a Class 4 Laser without Eye Protection

It is the risk of retinal burn for the user and those around them that is major problem. At this power level simply looking at the laser spot on a normal non-reflective surface may cause a permanient loss of vision. Never mind a specular reflection from a window or actually shiny thing!

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Anonymous Coward

Wankers will buy these

I was walking in Birmingham when I was flashed with a laser pointer by a man in the passenger seat of a passing 08-reg Audi 4WD - unfortunately I didn't get the full registration because I instinctively closed my eyes and turned away. The whole world instantly goes bright green and it's very frightening.

I hate to think what that tosser would do with one of these - presumably they could they cause permanent serious eye damage? If so, these ought to go on the UK prohibited list like guns, Samurai swords and ordinary laser pointers.

Rant over.

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@Wankers will buy these

Yes - a 1W visible laser will cause permanent eye damage before you can blink.

ps. The difference between this and a kitchen knife is you can't sit on a motorway bridge with a kitchen knife and crash every car that goes underneath it.

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Filter lenses?

How long before we can get "sunglasses" that notch filter out the frequencies of these lasers? Would make flying a plane or driving a car a whole lot safer.

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Joke

Oh...

...so it's legal to sell a thousand laser pointers, but not legal to sell one light sabre as powerful as a thousand laser pointers?

Hypocrite.

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