A technical hiccup has delayed the planned restart of the Large Hadron Collider (LHC), the titanic subterranean magno-doughnut particle smasher situated deep beneath the Franco-Swiss border. The LHC, most outrageous matter-rending machine ever assembled by the human race, had been expected to fire up its circulating hadron beams …
"titanic subterranean magno-doughnut particle smasher "
First class work Lewis, keep it up
I always thought that was what an 'Abrupt dump' was all about. It would appear I've been wrong all this time, not being a physicist and all that.
Am I the only one who read
"the titanic subterranean magno-doughnut particle smasher" as the titanic subterranean maNGo-doughnut particle smasher?
Ah well. My excuse is it's lunchtime
Just back from the Christmas holidays??? I really should have stayed in Physics.
cue the luis sancho technobabble filled, end of the world, rant in -
... not much technobabble, but someone claiming to be Sancho has posted forecasts of doom below!
WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE!!!!
we're doomed!! DOOMED!!!!
"....though presumably it would have caused an abrupt dump incident had a powerful beam been circulating."
I'll bet it would have!
If you look at the magnet temperature graph for sector 78, you can see a sudden increase in temperature for some magnets from 2K to 5K at around 18:00 yesterday.
Blatantly obvious and simple reason.
Whoever came through the dimensional portal nipped in, turned the heating on and went back again, they'll be back next week when it's warmed up a bit.
rammed by an aircraft carrier...
going how fast?
Why are scientist such wimps, when i get a new car first thing i do is see how fast it goes, come on guys wack it up to 11 and hit the on switch, i'm hoping for a Sam Beckett type result.
oh and 'won't anyone think of the inter-dimensional children'
> when i get a new car first thing i do is see how fast it goes
I assume from the fact you're still here that said car isn't a Toyota.
...hey, maybe they should take over the LHC - it'll be accelerating consistently in no time!
In a few years time, after all the extended holidays and mechanical failures; this overblown piece of Meccano might just start to provide some results.
You realise that it's aliens / people from the future who keep sabotaging this thing, because they don't want the galaxy to cease to exist?
Aliens from the future
Wot, like they woke up one morning and said, "Oh dear, we don't exist ... we'd better go back in time and fix this so that we can have breakfast"
Keep well informed
That I go out and buy a hazard suit and a trusty new crowbar.
Science and society - making knowledge useful
Following the diversion of funding from physics to large hadron colliders, surely it is appropriate for universities to phase out the teaching of physics in favour of large hadron collider studies. Looks very much like we need that now. And for those without the faintest ability in maths, the consolation prize of a humanities degree in the history and philosophy of large hadron colliders. In the hyperreal, everyone can be a winner.
Ok, I admit that this is (or one of) the most advanced tech on the planet right now...but dammit, when are they actually gonna get it working? Is anyone else wonder "IF"...not "WHEN" ?
Yeah, yeah...expensive...hi-tech...complex...millions of components....blah, blah, blah. This HEV suit cost a fortune you know - I still plan to use it before I retire, but it's touch and go at this rate.
Mines the orange one.
it's about the engineers
all these problems the LHC has are engineering problems ... maybe somebody should use the "money back guarantee" ? They had enough time to make it work ...
Rube Goldberg was a beginner
When you think of the complexities involved just in quenching the system...
PH, because she is much simpler to figure out
Err, point of order yeronner...
"Hyperpowered lightspeed particle beams"? Shouldn't that be "nearly light speed"? I suspect that if they did manage to accelerate owt else other than.. well.. photons to the speed of light, there would be some brown trousers in the control room, and maybe even A Fuss made.
Nothing can go wrong
Do we *have* to use the word 'Titanic' to describe it?
Other dimensions would be cool, but what about the simpler parallel universe?
Another dimension is difficul to visualize, but for me a parallel universe is not so hard. Image looking at a friend while you draw a spiral with your finger in front of them. In your friend's perception, your spiral is opposite of the way you are drawing it. Kind of like seeing "CENALUBMA" directly on a vehicle, then seeing it in your rear-view mirror, and realizing it is an AMBULANCE.
Parallel universes may manifest to us in different ways than that, but my example is the easiest way O have found to visualize one.
Parallel universes, no problem
It's just spelling that's difficult for you to visualize?
'round and 'round the mullberry bush...
"Such brutal treatment is expected to force tortured hadrons to cough up many of the universe's secrets. In particular, visitors from other dimensions (albeit extremely small and shortlived ones) may be on the cards"
Poor little protons... what's next? Water boarding?
Have they learnt nothing from Star Trek!!!
I welcome our new extra dimentional overlords!
- Mounties always get their man: Heartbleed 'hacker', 19, CUFFED
- Analysis Oh no, Joe: WinPhone users already griping over 8.1 mega-update
- Leaked pics show EMBIGGENED iPhone 6 screen
- Opportunity selfie: Martian winds have given the spunky ol' rover a spring cleaning
- OK, we get the message, Microsoft: Windows Defender splats 1000s of WinXP, Server 2k3 PCs