Avatar whups Confucius's sorry ass Sci-fi epic Avatar has administered a righteous kicking at the Chinese box office to a locally-produced film about the life of Confucius - despite the authorities' reported attempt to ensure the home-grown product's success. Historical drama Confucius has taken a mere 97 million yuan ($14m) since its release on 22 January, and …
So was it or wasn't it released on standard 2D in the end? Sociologists have to know! If on general 2D release then look out for future "litmus test" releases used to guage the revolutionary potential of the unwashed masses. Then again maybe the Chinese are flocking to cinemas to witness that mythycal creation known as a "quality product"! (in terms of CGI at least)
Ahh I rip the piss but all the while I'm alright. As of new years eve I'm a free man, out of the steenking post-industrial piss-pit that the UK has become, now living comfortably (VERY comfortably) "off the land" in Portugal. Like I said: SUFO - Sell Up, Fuck Off. If this post sounds a bit ranty its cos I was just at me neighbour's cellar sampling his latest vintage. Still a bit "fizzy ribena" but very palateable and does the trick regardless.
Yeah, life's good if you don't stand for any of its shit!!! Now I'm gonna roll a joint. And probably have the Moderatrix (I get the feeling she is now legion, though) bin this post. A move I heartilly recommend due to my intoxicated state.
Recommended, but not expected...
I know many euros claim the States has no culture but we sure can export it well with the Hollywood machine. China is dangerous and all but any rational state would avoid wiping us out because hopefully they need our movies (of course lots of UK, OZ actors, directors in Hollywood as well). Of course this also explains why the Middle East is such a danger, they don't seem to want anything we offer. I guess nirvana is goat farming in a land of only true believers and then enjoying your 72 virgins when you die.
If I want to watch stuff about Confucius, I'd tune in to the History Channel. I'd rather sleep at home and not in the cinema.
Oh well, the Chinese seem to be unable to produce interesting movies or cartoons; their lame attempts at exploiting the "Monkey King" legends are surpassed by the Japanese anime portrayals (one of them would be Dragon Ball Z).
On the other side, they did bring us Shaolin Soccer!
I am sorry there, old man, I seem to have absolutely no clue what you are talking about.
Big budget 3D films about pretendy people travelling in pretendy spaceships to pretendy moons of pretendy planets to mine pretendy minerals despite the pretendy blue aliens wanting to continue to hug their pretendy trees and ride their pretendy flying things without having their pretendy homes mined by the aforementioned pretendy people is not culture, even if it is in 3D.
Given H'wood's propensity for remakes, surely it'll only be a matter of a few years before some one decided to take the Chinese film and remake it for the sweating masses, (in super hi-def 3D smellovision, or whatever's in vogue at the time).
I predict that the lead will be taken by either Robert Downey Jr or maybe Steven Seagal. "Confewshush" will go into exile to do his 'thinking thing' after his family is brutally slaughtered by Ghengis Khan and his Mongol hordes, only barely escaping himself. Then he'll come back to revenge himself on GK and hordes with "kick-ass" kung fu moves along with major explosions (after he discovers gunpowder and guns in an A-Team type segment). GK will then kidnap the Emperor's daughter, Conf will then rescue her, fight GK to the death in the Forbidden Palace, before inflicting major gunpowder-related damage on the Mongol hordes that are threatening to invade the Palace. We find out that GK is actually some evil space alien, and Conf is actually an amnesiac alien prince himself. Film finishes with Conf embracing female lead while staring dramatically into the sunrise promising to 'protect this land that I love'. GK to be played by Alan Rickman, John Malkovich or Anthony Hopkins. Not sure who would be slated to play the obligatory sidekick - Jet Li or Jackie Chan?
Should I get writing that screenplay at this point...? ;)
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