back to article Greenock pensioners cuffed for Tesco 'sex romp'

Two Greenock pensioners prompted the closure of a Tesco bakery aisle and police intervention after "stunned shoppers" clocked the pair indulging in a "sex romp", the Sun reports. Fay Byrne, 62, and chum Peter Echlin, 78, were arrested for alleged public indecency after "horrified store bosses alerted cops". A Tesco source …

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Paris Hilton

Give em both a medal

Especially her for initiating it all!

Paris for fairly obvious reasons.

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tut tut

Another wardrobe defect.

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Alert

Staff announcement...

...Cleaner required in aisle 2!

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Ahem

You owe me a new keyboard.

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Staff announcement...

Fluffer you are now required in aisle 3!

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Coat

I don't know if it'll go to court.

But if it does will stand up in court?

(I'll join, what I assume will be by now, the queue at the coat stand)

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Go

Impressive

78 and it still works, right on sir!!!

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Coat

Inspired by motto

... Every Little Helps

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Coat

Tsk.

At least they weren't wearing pyjamas.

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Coat

Heart Problems...

"The widow was also noted to have Acute Angina which was said to have made the situation worse".

Sorry, couldn't resist...

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Pint

Woohoo!

It's friday!

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Linux

New icon required.

OK, there is no IT angle to this.

However, I would be willing to let it slide if you could give us a new litle blue v icon.

I guess bread was not the only thing being raised in this bakery section.

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There's only one possible comment.

Playmobil reconstruction please.

PS. We're still waiting for a Playmobil icon.

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ROFL

That's absolutely brilliant I love the quotes!

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Cleanup in isle 3....

title says it all.

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is required.

Jock Joystick Joyride Jeopardy

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Coat

Checking out her baps?

Obligatory coat picture.

I'm still confused though - they're both claiming the other one started it?

"Nothing like this has happened before." - poor fella

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A titillation is required

Pictures or it didn't happe....on second thoughts scratch that.

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Anonymous Coward

I hesitate to ask....

What's the IT Angle?

V. Funny though?

ID Cards for them then - just in case!

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Unhappy

tenuous but plausible

The offended Tesco workers were former employees from the mahoosive IBM installation that was closed down in Greenock not long ago, or some equally high tech manufacturing outfit that took advantage of the constituency's pensioner quotient to put up cheap facilities and then folded.

AC because I may actually know some of them.

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Happy

No one else?

OK I'll say it then....ahem, "Clean up in aisle 6 please!"!

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Coat

Unsurprising

It is Greenock; there's not an awful lot to do here.

Still. every little helps...

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(Written by Reg staff)

Re: There's only one possible comment.

You're still waiting for a Playmobil icon? How remiss of us. I shall be certain to raise the issue of 'fulfilling the commentards' every sordid whim' at Monday's meeting and ensure it is marked for urgent actioning.

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@moderatrix

you said raise, fulfil, sordid whim and urgent actioning

wheres the icon for new pants please?

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Paris Hilton

Oh goody.

I have a sordid whim Ms Bee....

Sadly I suspect it will remain unfulfilled.

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Happy

I thought I saw you in Tesco

Second job to help make ends meet?

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(Written by Reg staff)

Re: I hesitate to ask....

If anyone else asks what the IT angle is on a Bootnotes article, I will kill again.

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WTF?

Gawd 'elp us

Again?

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Coat

Did..

.. the master baker intervene?

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(Written by Reg staff)

Re: No one else?

Yes. Someone else. Look up.

Sorry, but if I don't, you'll never learn, will you?

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Happy

@"raise the issue of 'fulfilling the commentards' every sordid whim'"

You need a bravery award for risking saying that in public! ;)

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Alert

I wonder...

If tesco actually had a code to alert staff to the fact that people were fornicating in the aisle.

As in code 67 isle 2

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Happy

one good turn deserves another

at least it wasn't a code 69

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Utterly stunned....

And we thought David Carradine was a Master...whatever.

Grief, at my age, I don't even wanna think about it, and I'm only(?) 53.

Oh, and at Moderatrix's comment "Re: No-one else" 'Yes. Someone else. Look up.', posts aren't posted or moderated at the time they're sent. They are done in batches. Probably when the pub opposite El Reg closes. So who can know that they aren't the first?

Go on, Sarah, click the 'Rejected' button. You know you're dying to ;-)

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(Written by Reg staff)

Re: Utterly stunned....

Alright, fair enough, Andus, but it's still astonishing to me that anyone here can think they're first with any quip when the chances are good that er, they won't be.

The comments are done in batches because I HAVE OTHER ACTUAL WORK TO DO inbetween changing all of your virtual nappies, capiche?

Man, I feel fighty today.

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@Sarah

"Man, I feel fighty today"

See you near the bread counter, then? No pyjamas, though...

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Pint

> I feel fighty today

so how would we tell?

guess that next you'll pretending to be offended and stomp off to the pub

(as if eh?)

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Joke

Whoa! Moderatrix didn't kill me! Result!

In appreciation, although it's -20 celcius outside, I'm gonna get the barman of this pub to crush some bottles, and sprinkle the shards on the ground on the path home.

Then, I'm gonna crawl 200 metres to the house on hands and knees, naked*, so I can feel true subserviance to 'She-Who-Rules'

I woz lucky! (Motorway tongue-washing? Cardboard box? Luxury!)

* Not a pretty sight. Mercifully, it's dark at present. Only way anyone'll see a 'full moon' tonight.

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(Written by Reg staff)

Re: > I feel fighty today

Why don't you come here and say that?

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Re: > I feel fighty today

> Why don't you come here and say that?

wow, is that an offer of a beer?

result :)

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Anonymous Coward

Cleaner's busy today

He might have meant 'feisty'. Do you still want him to come over?

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feeling feisty

If she's feeling Feisty now, the rest of you will just have to wait in line. Could be a long wait...

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I see what you did there

> Do you still want him to come over?

ooh-err, very clever

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Paris Hilton

LOL

Isn't it funny that we are the only species that, thanks to the adherants of non existant dieties, who have made the jump from set to moralities and defilement - are declared to "be punishable" for breeding activities.

Paris - because she is good to spend a night in.

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Badgers

Must be the Tesco 'Value' Viagra!

Presumably they were aiming for the "oldest person to be listed on the sex offenders database" award?

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Joke

Value vs Finest

Dose the 'Tesco Finest' range of Viagra also increase girth as-well as increasing stiffness?

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(Written by Reg staff)

Re: Whoa! Moderatrix didn't kill me! Result!

Good grief.

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Dead Vulture

Playmobil reconstruction

Please no! They are wrinkeled old pensioners for god's sake.

One foot in the grave, etc..

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Coat

There could be some good from all of this

With any luck, some of the local yoofs were in the store and had the sight of geriatric genitalia gyrating sufficiently seared into their brains as to utterly drive drive out any urge to procreate ever again.

...I can hope, can't I?

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Alert

every cloud

has a silver surfer liner.......... thou are panty liners required at that age?????

Probably but to stop a different type of flow!

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