back to article Next from Apple: The Pocket iPad

Sources in Cupertino have exclusively confirmed to the Reg that Apple intends to follow up its anticipated iPad success with a miniature, pocket-sized version boasting added voice technology. "The iPad's a great device," an executive familiar with the matter said yesterday. "But think how great it would be if you could carry it …

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lol

I have been reading this story on my beta iPad Nano, keep up the good work

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Joke

Joke Alert

Nuff said.

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Coffee/keyboard

Ha, Ha, Ha, Ha, Ha, Ha

no words needed really although I am wondering how many comments will be posted before the first serious fanboi comes along with tales of the iPhone etc :-)

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WTF?

You Kids

With your humour and 'music television'.

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Jobs Halo

wow!

Wow !

This sounds like just the ticket ! I was going to buy an iPad, but knowing there's a smaller, more voicey-version just around the corner makes me determined to grit my teeth, gnaw my thumbs and tweak my earlobes until it arrives.

Is there a shipping date yet ? Where can I put down some sort of deposit on this mythical device ? And am I OK to tell all my mates I'm getting one ahead of any formal announcement ?

Ah feck it - I'm off twittering and facebooking all my friends with this tale of technological-triumphery !

(Sorry, gotta run - phone's ringing and bubblewrap needs bursting..)

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Paris Hilton

Mmm...

...iDeposit...

Oh dear, 'multi-touch' takes on a whole new meaning. And is there a gesture for 'wipe-clean'?

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iPad mini

Isn't a iPad mini just the same as an IPod touch? Or am I missing something?

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Bronze badge
FAIL

Yes

Yes, you are.

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Jobs Horns

iSanitary Napkin

I was just figuring that Jobs forgot about the announcement til the night before and thought "F*** it, what have we got lying around I can show them??? I know, there's that huge f*cking prototype 'iPod Touch For The Short Sighted' that Bob knocked up when he was drunk that time that when we all laughed at him for it."

So maybe this is the 'iPod Touch for the Near Sighted with Bonus Voice Features'?

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Jobs Horns

haha

good one El Reg, shame it's almost true, Apple are just descending into ever decreasing design circles wrappd up in ever increasing hyperbole.

think I'll go climb a tree.....

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Whoa....

That sounds BRILLIANT!!!!!! I cant wait for it, my iphone just doesnt cut it, but if i could get some kind of smaller tablet with a phone in it and seriously reduced battery life, i would snap it up!

I hope that someone thinks of bringing out some kind of portable record player that allows me to listen to music on the move, maybe using some kind of proprietry in-ear speakers.

I must admit, i dont know where technology is going next....Fire, the wheel, Elastic-trickery....Amazing!

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This post has been deleted by a moderator

2 shillings and sixpence

Bugger off, shillboy.

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FAIL

@ AC 13:44

Looks like it took a grand total of 45 minutes .....

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Sounds exactly like....

My JAILBROKEN iphone, but not as mobile and more expensive!

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Troll

Wow...

...you've got copy and paste! Just how long did you have to wait, and how much did you have to pay, for that value adding technological marvel?

While I'm at it: "The large, high-resolution screen makes iPad perfect for watching any kind of video: from HD movies and TV shows"

*cough* BULLSHIT! *cough*

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Oh you.

How you toy with us.

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WTF?

Hang on....

wouldn't a pocket sized version fo the iPad otherwise be known as the iPhone??!!

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Coat

@takuhii

It seems that we are a little slow today. There is a strong possibility that this article was written tongue-in-cheek, and, as a consequence, one must rnot take it at face value.

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Megaphone

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

You tit.

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Silver badge

Not at all

"wouldn't a pocket sized version fo the iPad otherwise be known as the iPhone??!!"

On the contrary, dear sir, on the contrary...

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WTF?

WTF?

Let's make a big iPhone!

Sure, why not

Now let's make a small big iPhone!

Excuse me, sir. Isn't that just an iPhone?

Hush.

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Oh dear

I am rattling my head off the desk as we speak.

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Have they...

...trademarked the letter "i" yet?

It's so great to start the day with a good laugh. Thanks, Reggers.

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Anonymous Coward

They will once they release the next must have toy

,,, the iDiot

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Happy

Aha!

iRecursion.

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hehehe

Brilliant work guys.

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Humble pie

Should we order it for el reg now?

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Brilliant

Sent from my iMac G5 desktop - which I love - but the iPad is a joke. See, not all fanboiz are zealots!

There's a good article in the Torygraph as well:

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/technology/apple/7092013/Why-I-dont-want-an-Apple-iPad.html

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lmao

i've always liked the writing style on el Reg, but not often do i almost fall out of my chair laughing!

great article!

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Jobs Halo

Oh wow

Man, imagine, a MASSIVE iPad on your desk, with a keyboard - it would be just like a common-or-garden iPad in it's dock, standing upright at a slight tilt. The keyboard could connect by Bluetooth, and other things could too, maybe a mouse? Best of all, as you wouldn't need to move it around, you could plug it straight into the mains!

I'm telling you, Apple is the FUTURE.

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Erm, isn't that an iPhone?

Its yet to be proven how successful the iPad will be. Lack of OSX and no flash card slot are big -ve's for me.

Weed

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Happy

Proof please!

Yet more idle speculation about Apple vapourware...

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Welcome

Title goes here

So a smaller version of the iPad with a SIM card in it?

Hmm, they could call it something like an, ooh, iPhone, or is that a silly name?

I'm sure I won't be the only person to say that...

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Haven't they already done something like that

With the Newton.

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This post has been deleted by its author

Go

Bravo!

And you wonder why Apple's PR department never return your calls.

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FAIL

Not enough Sarcasm

1/10 too subtle.

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Wrong direction...

Apple are looking to increase the size. The next gen will be called the Max-iPad.

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superb comment

you missed that one El Reg :-)

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(Written by Reg staff)

Re: Hang on....

*crying laughing*

I'm sorry to have to throw you to the internet, takuhii, but show me the moderator who could resist.

*further crying laughing*

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(Written by Reg staff)

Interesting

the proportion of readers of this satirical website who don't appear to grasp the concept of satire.

*no longer crying laughing*

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Anonymous Coward

We shoud be grateful

At least they can read.

Probably all merkins anyway. Most of the ones I have met seem to have trouble with sarcasm, satire, accents, geography. In that order.

AC, 'cos work for them.

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WTF?

Surely The Register isn't a satirical website

I thought it was more like Private Eye: enough true stuff to be interesting, enough satire to prevent it being sued into oblivion.

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Don't worry Sarah

Some of us keep a few braincells around for articles such as this one. Liked it very much - more please!

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Silver badge

Not crying laughing, just crying

Ah come on. You know you've got some Daily Mail readers that cross-over here occasionally. It's a statistical certainty. Mainly because they're trawling the internet hoping that there is a site somewhere that provides a register of either nonces or immigrants, or preferably both. They end up here for that hopeful reason.

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Coffee/keyboard

But........

Isn't the iPad just a Trigger Happy TV iPhone?

I bet the polo-necked one will still managed to sell the mini iPad to the fanbois!!!!

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Grenade

Oh please, just get on with your lives

OK, they released it, It is what it is, and it isn't what it isn't. Get over yourselves and actually find new stories about new stuff.

No one forced all the tech news outlets to keep hyping it in advance of the launch, you did that all yourselves. Lazy boys get lots of hits tho.

For what it is worth, I think it looks like a pretty useful bit of kit at a reasonable price.

The real tech news angle is that it uses an Apple SoC CPU - that, at least, is something new, and a canny move to protect their IP investment as you can't just copy and crack a piece of hardware so easily.

Oh yeah, the iPhone/Touch does seem to be quite popular with users, despite (or maybe because of?) the twatphone, jesusphone mudslinging from some quarters. Go figure...

Come back in a year and see what happened to the iPad.

Remember - you do not have to buy one if you don't like it.

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Not just the tech articles

The mainstream press seem to have been just as obsessed, two whole pages in the Guardian this morning - the first two inside pages. It did strike me that there are a few more important things happening in the world than the release of a niche product by a technology company but my knowledge of what is importnat to the media is obviously defective. Must drink more kool aid.

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Mr.

"Come back in a year and see what happened to the iPad."

Come back in a year and see if you've developed a sense of humour.

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