Drug smugglers in Spain are at least 25 kilos of cocaine short after boxes of bananas in which they'd hidden the Bolivian marching powder ended up on supermarket shelves. The alarm was raised on Saturday morning when several one kilo packets were found in a box of "enormous green tropical bananas" in a Madrid branch of …
Wonder if any made it to the UK. I'm off shopping... to Lidl.
More than 100kg of cocaine is still missing, the police arrested the smugglers before they could pick up the bananas at the wholse market in Madrid. So out the bananas went to Lidl all over Spain. Off to Lidl now to get some..
And people put down these cut price supermarkets for their lack of variety!! where else could you buy banannas, milk, 2 way motorcycle radio and cocane all in one go!!!
and dont forget Lidl's catch phrase 'cheaper!'
Lidl new year offers?
Was this a smuggling mistake or did Lidl's buying department just get into the christmas spirit?
I don't have a Lidl near me and Aldi don't seem to include 'exotic bananas' in thier special offers.
Come Mr tally man, tally me bananas
I'm just off to Lidl to get some coke...
There goes any chance of getting cheap bananas for the next few weeks.
21st century myth
There used to be a story that you could dry banana skins and smoke them. Apparently.
A kilo bag of coke with your 'nanas seems like a much simpler way to get high and at 2 euros a bunch definitely a bargain too!
From the jolly rogers cookbook as i recall.
Tried it, and peanut skins, and tea.
Did FA except make me cough my lungs out.
Hallucinogenic banana skins
That is actually true, although whether they affect people is doubtful. I can assure you that my cockatoo and a few of my budgies were hooked stone-cold on banana skins; I had to keep the bananas locked in a cupboard to keep the birds away from them.
Bananadine myth vaguely based on half-understood reality.
There is actually quite a lot of 5HT (serotonin) in banana peel, but it can't cross the blood-brain barrier, so smoking them, or any other kind of ingestion isn't going to work. You'd basically have to extract it into liquid form and then inject it straight through your skull directly into your brain to get some kind of a hit off it.
Breaking the brain-blood barrier...
OK, so all I have to do is inject liquefied banana peel directly into my brain, and I get a serotonin surge? SIGN ME UP!!!! I'll even get a port installed if it really flies! Or, if I really fly...
Getting a port installed
You can do that by drilling through one of your eye sockets. Better make that a cordless drill, so you can do it in the bathroom. Have the bananas ready, though, coz you'll need your first serotonin surge pretty soon after creating the port.
Alternatively, you might pause to reflect that if Mother Nature In Her Wisdom has set up a blood-brain barrier, it's probably there for a reason.
Great Nanny Plan
I'm totally loving this, it's got to be the best plan to encourage the populus to eat their five-a-day...
An Easy Mistake?
I'm always amazed this doesn't happen more often - do drug smugglers have state-of-the-art shipment tracking? I assume not...
"enormous green tropical bananas"
Apparently they were perfectly ordinary bananas before the contents of the box were carelessly spilled during opening.
Snow in the festive season? Who could have seen that coming?
"Shop at Lidl and pay $100 a toot for Christmas banana sherbet!"
Paris, coz she knows exactly what to do with bananas and sherbet.
Thats why Kerry Katonas
Off to LIdl............................
Can anyone else imagine the faces of the gangsters receiving a delivery of bananas?
I definitely wouldn't want to be the guy who arranged this :)
A good source of potassium
...and tooth grinding, gurning and talking utter bollocks, now.
It's simply a ruse by Lidl to lure more customers
...most of them IT bods by the sound of it.
Mine's the coat with the map to my nearest Lidl in the pocket
truly epic smuggling fail
I'd hazard a guess that the perps enjoyed their own imports ? Never a good indicator of competence. Either way, win for spanish police, epic fail for the perps.
OK, who else misread this part?
They tipped them out onto a table and began sifting them
--- misread as; ---
They tipped them out onto a table and began sniffing them
Yeah I had to read it again to make sure I read it right. Though what I do wonder about is why didnt they just use FedEx? Guaranteed delivery anywhere :P and its not like FedEx give a shite about whats in the package.
And the picture would be good reconstructed using Playmobil.
These crims were obviously behind the times and not using RFID tagged stock.
Gimme a drink...
...one with rum and offending bananas in it.
... well known for its incredible bargains, this being just another one.
Someone when to spain for the holidays
and all I got was a couple of cases of bananas. Bastards!
and words fail to...
A "sensational error" eh?
Presumably the sensation that they are referring to here is that of having ones bollocks nailed to the table by a stony-faced henchman as the boss asks yet again where his nose candy is.
Does this mean the banana will now become the El Reg unit of measurement for drugs?
Intruiging idea sir....
....how exactly would such a measurement work?
Do you take the volume of the banana to be simply the fruit, or fruit plus skin? Do you use the term bunch for dealing with large quantities of drugs based on the Banana scale?
this count as one of my five fruits and veg a day?
I've heard of....
...Cherry Coke but this is just taking the piss.
Paris - Doh.. by dose.