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Georgia cops cuff terrorist elf
Georgia cops earlier this week cuffed a man in an elf suit on the not unreasonable grounds that he told a shopping mall Santa he was packing dynamite. William Caldwell. Pic: Clayton County Sheriff's Office William C Caldwell III, 45, reportedly "got in line Wednesday evening to get his picture taken with Santa Claus" at the …
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US Centred much?
I'd expected to read a story about cops in Tbilisi not some yank place.
Did anyone else hear him apart from Santa?
Because I keep hearing of these cases where person X has been locked up as a "terrorist" because person Y claims that person X made a "threat", but person X claims they didn't make the threat and there are no other witnesses.
If person Y is a police officer then person X tends to be out of luck as its impossible to disprove the accusation.
If someone told me in private they had a bomb I'd tell them to go and tell security. I wouldn't repeat the claim to anyone else because I wouldn't want to share responsibility for yet another unnecessary evacuation or for getting someone else (or myself) into trouble because of a misunderstanding. If anyone blamed me afterwards for not passing on the message I'd claim I misheard it: I thought they said they'd found someone's wallet, or something.
Does it matter if anyone else heard him?
From the article:
"possessing hoax devices"
"possessing hoax devices"
That'd be the over sized dildo in his pocket. Or just about anything that the cop thought might be something that it wasn't in fact. If I'm carrying a box and you think there might be a bomb inside does that make it a "hoax device"?
In private, maybe. In public...?
So you're working in a public area, filled with kids. Some nutter in an oversize suit says to you, "I've got Semtex under here, and I'm going to murder you all". Is your response:
(a) "I double-dare you!"
(b) "Thank you for feeling you can trust me, sir. Whilst I don't intend to violate your freedom of self-expression, please may I contact my colleagues who'll put you in touch with an anger-management consultant to work through your issues?"
(c) "BOMB!!!" Tackle to ground, and have your mates help hold him down (with both arms locked) until the cops can take over.
If your worst fear is that someone would blame you for it afterwards, think again. If you had the option of stopping the guy before he murdered a hundred kids, but you didn't because you were too worried about getting yourself into trouble, your worst fear should be that *you* would blame *yourself* for it. Assuming you have an ounce of decency, that is.
Jingle Bells..
...Morrow smells,
That mall is a dump
And I hope he enjoys himself at the Dredd-esque 'Clayton Justice Center'
The whole area is strip malls, DUI driving centers, and used car lots.
I avoid US19 entirely, rather go toward McDonnough over to I75, so as to avoid the entire area.
Amen Brother!
You got that right. I've never lost anything in that area that makes me want to go back. The little dude will likely get exactly what he deserves in the end.
@Andrew Norton
The lyrics lose the melody after the thrid line, but otherwise good effort.
PhotoShop!
Could someone please Photoshop an elm suit on the perb...
Sad, but......
...he's only got his elf to blame........
I'm sorry, even I groaned at that one. Yeah, yeah...I'll get it on my way out.
I once wanted to kill Santa
I took a blind child to see Santa (at an event where they'd invited a class from an RNIB school), and when we unwrapped the present he'd got... Colouring books!
Had I been in possession of a stick of dynamite at the time, it would have gone very hard for Santa.
Obviously carrying dynamite on school trips is a breach of elf and safety rules.
He's Lucky
In the UK he would have found himself in trouble with the "Elfin Safety Executive".
My Favorite
My favorite Christmas Elf:
http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=1108137
Cruel and Unusual
"languishing without bond or pointy felt hat "
How will he be able to attract new friends?
Oh. Wait! He's short and looks like that? Never mind.
What he really said
He actually said, "I have a rocket in my pocket" but Santa misunderstood him.
Requote
Perhaps he simply stated, "I've got something in my pants for you... and its DY-NA-MITE!"
With apologies to 70's sitcom "Good Times"
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