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back to article TechCrunch knocks off Vulture Central RegPad™

The long-rumored TechCrunch CrunchPad does not exist, according to more rumor. As recently as this summer, the TechCrunch CrunchPad was heralded by TechCrunch as a turning point in the history of couch computing. But according to a new report from TechCrunch, TechCrunch has now been told it's no longer involved in the project. …

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FAIL

True to form

"We will almost certainly be filing multiple lawsuits against Fusion Garage, and possibly Chandra and his shareholders as individuals, shortly."

How true to form.

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Dead Vulture

RegPad feature set

I, for one, refuse to not buy a non-existent RegPad which doesn't not include the ability to automatically post slightly creepy, half-joking comments mooning over the Moderatrix.

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The non-existent RegPad is an Awesome Tool for Virtual Existence too *

"I, for one, refuse to not buy a non-existent RegPad which doesn't not include the ability to automatically post slightly creepy, half-joking comments mooning over the Moderatrix." ... David W.

Posted Tuesday 1st December 2009 03:47 GMT

Ah yes, the Sticky Sweet Seventh Heaven Model/AIdDymanic Processing Unit, David W.. ...... Best Phormed and Phished as Abiding Fixture Passion in Permanent Residence for Desires. And an Active Semantic Present Field of Beta Future Research, El Regers ...... http://cryptome.org/0001/nsa112309.htm ...... and at/on Various Levels of Mature and XXXXPerienced CloudDevelopment.

* Honey Trap or Feather Bed, El Reg, or Both when QuITe Pathologically Eternally Optimistic and Eminently Enabled, with the One in Reinforcing Support of the Other for an Alien Third Party Beta, SurReally in XXXXStreamly Smarter Control of them All and Everything.

ROTM ..... Book 2 in which Wizard and Witches/Kings and Bitches are Immaculately Feted and Stealthily Secreted and Inserted into the Great Game for Heavenly Earthly Duties.... A CHore Driver in States of Perfect Enough Grace.

Which is a Pretty Deep Wild Wide Revelation Volume, a Pleasure to Read for ITs Shared Live Proofs. And Officials Scampering away behind IMPlausible Denials of Breakdowns in Future Knowledge Supply Destroying All Credibility, is a Real Tasty Treat ....... Present Power Paradigm Parallel ........ a Curve Ball Googley that Simply Destroys the Traditional Wicket in Virtually Real Games as Manic as Cricket.

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Mooning

over the Moderatrix? Pull your trousers up, you naughty boy and look guilty.

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Go

congratulations

You have made it into the top 10 google results for Techcrunch.

(incidentally, Chrome's built in dictionary doesn't recognise google as a valid word)

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Thumb Up

Come on, Mr.Metz

Do admit, you wrote the entire article only to be able to use the "According to TechCrunch, de-TechCrunching the TechCrunch CrunchPad is like de-Appling the Apple iPhone" sentence. :-)

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Joke

Outraged

I'm thoroughly outraged that the non-existent RegPad will, despite the overwhelming demand of at least two posters, remain non-existent. Surely if you're worried about uptake you could push through the much rumoured BOFH+ attachment with OfficeScam Pro & PHB_Disposer2.0?

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Linux

Awwh crapola

I was holding out for a Shark-o-raptorific V graphics card, as it will crash less than something using horrible Radeon series drivers. How could you forsake us like this?

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Can you handle the crunch?

Like that episode of the Mighty Boosh. The Regpad should be an e-ink device in a handy roll form, for all those 'private' skiving moments.

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Badgers

Dear El Reg,

As a potential purchaser of your non-existing device I am, de facto, a future shareholder. As a result, informing me of the never-to-exist item in question means I too will be suing. You can be most assured multiple filings are, even now, in the post.

When the legal system catches up I would appreciate my money in small bills as I'm also involved in an attempt to help rescue a foreign national whose evil uncle has locked up her trust fund. I am assured my money will be returned tenfold.

In the meantime.. on with the suing!

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Pint

Humoriffic

It is articles like this - especially your description of the "ill-fated" RegPad - which had me laughing my head off over here - that keep me coming back to ye olde Reg..

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