Get it right, please
1) Lawrence Berkeley National Laboratory is not a "nuke lab." It does not engage in any classified research nor does it perform any kinds of weapons research. A U.S. Department of Energy laboratory, it conducts unclassified, fundamental research.
2) While, I'm sure he appreciates the promotion, Horst Simon is not the director of Berkeley Lab-unless you know something the rest of us don't know. Paul Alivisatos is the current interim director. Horst is head of one of the labs six divisions: computing sciences. That makes him just one of six assistant lab directors.
I realize it is in the Registers' charter to be snarky, is it also in the charter to be correct? Or should we just look to the Onion for facts?