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back to article Animal lovers say no to radioactive NASA monkeys

Animal rights groups are apparently not pleased with NASA's plan to zap squirrel monkeys with repeated doses of radiation for science. The US space agency will expose between 18 to 28 of the moneys to low doses of radiation daily to better understand the effects of long-term exposure outside Earth's protective magnetic shield. …

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Coat

If only...

If only they had used spider monkeys...

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Anonymous Coward

Unified Comms Reg Readers Survey

There's an advert on a number of pages here for the Unified Comms Reg Readers Survey, unfortunately at the moment it actually reads *Unifed*. You might want to fix that ;)

I would just email someone, but I've no idea who's around...

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Happy

Simple solution

Offer to let one monkey go for each PETA member who volunteers.

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Pint

Simple solution:

... ask them protesters if any of them wants to take the monkey's place. It's no doubt that men will need to leave Earth sooner or later. If these people keep putting a spanner in the works, we'll not get progress.

Beer. I already have the peanuts and the thumb ready.

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Flame

Substitutes

Their compassion for nonhuman entities is commendable, but the research is also important and will improve the lives of future space-faring humans. So surely they'll show compassion for *all*species and volunteer themselves as test subjects...

Or maybe they're just wankers who like telling other people not to do things without spending the effort of thinking up any constructive ideas or alternatives.

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You can't have it both ways.

"the org asserts that the genetic, physiological, and anatomical differences the species will "dramatically limit" useful conclusions"

Usually they tell us that they are almost human with a claimed 98% identical DNA.

PS I think a word has been omitted from the quoted bit.

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Simple Solution!

If these animal rights lovers would like to stand-in for the monkeys and be our test candidates, more power to them! (pun intended, but if they start giving off carbon emissions we'll have put a green cork in 'em and plead with Obama for a few hundred mil to bury the waste).

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i wish you would take their place

@Anonymous Coward: would you take the monkey's place then? Or would those butchers that call them selves doctors do?

Do you think monkeys feel pain any different then you do? You think they are not affraid just as you would be? Do you think they don't want to live just as you do? Put your self in their shoes. You will be tied to a chair and irradiated, just so some so called doctors can see if you develop any brain cancer and die. Try to imagine the metallic taste left in your mouth by ionized air. Then imagine the nausea, sickness and hair falling in the following days.

Oh, and I forgot......you will spend the rest of your life in a cage, from with you will only leave to get some more radiation.

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Bronze badge
Coat

@simple solution

volunteer, hell. Grab the nearest PETA idiot and use him instead. Monkeys are far more intelligent and useful.

Mine's the one with the cobalt-60 irradiator in the pocket. Give it to the nice PETA worker over there, please, I want to see if he knows what the phrase 'Cherenkov radiation' means.

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FAIL

DNA

We share 80% of our DNA with bananas. So why not irradiate those instead?

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WTF?

PETA is stupid

Just type "peta stupid" into google and have fun seeing what turns up.

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LPF
Thumb Up

I have a better Idea

If this research is so important I vote for all the posters on this forum saying that "PETA Idiots" should volunteer instead of the monkeys be used instead. Obviously you feel the reasearch is important, plus you will be a 100% DNA match with the human race.

Could you all please post your name and details and I will pass it on to NASA. I'm sure they will even pay for your fare and accomdationa as well :)

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what is wrong with you people?

why do you think that it is ok to take a monkey out of it's home and away form it's family, tie it to a chair and blast it with radiation to see how much it suffers?

i cringe as i read your comments.

who is the stupid species?

A) the one that lives in harmony with nature for thousands of years

B) the one that spreads like a virus consuming every natural resource until the nature cannot sustain them anymore - leaving them with no option but to try and leave earth to go and fuck up some other eco system.

i find it disgusting that anyone would think it is justifiable to do what NASA are proposing.

to all the people that say run th tests on the protesters - why not step up yourselves, are none of you prepared to step up for the good of mankind?

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this partof the article really shows up the author for what he is

"The group itself, however, leaves out that the monkeys won't actually spend the rest of their lives being irradiated, but will afterwards retire to the McLean Hospital in Boston where veterinarians and staff will oversee their health."

Are you presenting this as some kind of ting that make it all ok?

would it be ok if a load of blokes charged in to your house, kidnapped you, tied you down and blasted you with radiation to measure your suffering and relative lifespan - as long as you were confined to a hospital afterwards ? or to put things in context - throwing you into a jungle

do you think a monkey wants to spend the rest of it's probably short life in agony while it waits to die in a hospital? Monkey's do not find hospitals comforting places to be, they prefer to be outside swinging around in tree's.

how can it be that you have so little understanding of what is right and what is wrong. You would be better suited writing for the Daily Mail.

Yes you Austin Modine, shame on you

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@ Pitagora

"Do you think monkeys feel pain any different then you do? You think they are not affraid(sic) just as you would be? Do you think they don't want to live just as you do?"

No, because they're animals. Also, they don't wear shoes.

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Creepy?

Sell them afterwards as "Glow in the dark Monkeys" for afterhours Gummint positions, or use as employees in unlit underground call-centres.

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FAIL

@bexley

I don't think they'd be using natural-born monkeys- more likely lab ones bred especially for testing. So there's far less of an issue with us plucking them from their natural surroundings and disrupting animal communities.

And the clever species is the one that adapts best to its environment- or adapts its environment to suit it. Which is us. The species that develops the ability to defend- and eventually all but rid- itself of predators. Groups that are not able or not willing to adapt (or just choose not to) as required are the "stupid" ones.

And when we spread to our next world- barring a sudden development of massive wormhole tech that lets us suit out habitable extrasolar planets- we'll have to develop our own ecosystem. We can't breathe on, say, Mars. So we'd need to create a self-sustaining, sealed environment to support ourselves.

As a side effect, this will give us technologies that will allow us to clean up the mess we've made on the Earth. CO2 scrubbers, mass clean power generation, the most effective material choices for recycling- all of these are things that'll be needed in the sealed environment of an offworld habitat or spacecraft. So we'll be the only race (that we know of) in the history of the universe who've developed to the point where they can actually clean up after themselves.

And none of us people saying use the protesters are going to step up because we have monkeys taking our place and would rather like to live to see the future Nasa's helping to create. Would you rather that they used humans? Maybe death-row inmates should be irradiated instead of being given a quick death (actually, this could be an interesting final-stage "is it definitely safe?" test)?

As for your second test, perhaps you'd prefer to see the monkeys just blasted until they die or blasted with radiation and released back into the wild (to be killed off)? If you accept that monkeys are being used- whether you agree or not they will be- then surely this is the best solution? And I'm sure if a post-trial monkey is able to they'll be provided with a branch or two to swing from.

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Kidnapping?

These are cage raised animals, not wild ones. Why on earth would you go all the way to South America and 'kidnap' monkeys instead of getting them from a breeder?

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@Adam Foxton

Finally, a balanced response.

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Welcome

I for one...

Welcome our new nuclear monkey overlords? /shrug

I do find it funny what an unrealistic view of the world PETA has, their intentions are noble and all but they tend to be a bit absurd at times. They should really be protesting nature, there are certain species of monkeys that resort to cannibalism in times of a food shortage. It's even been documented, so let's stop all this monkey on monkey violence first then we can talk about NASA.

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Troll

Re: what is wrong with you people? #

"to all the people that say run th tests on the protesters - why not step up yourselves...?"

Because we're smart enough to use monkeys.

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