The Support Call
The conversation will go something like this:
Apple: Thank you for calling apple support this is Brian. How may I help you?
Iphonian:Hi Brian,thank you for taking my call. I seem to be having a problem with my music player.
Apple:Well, I can definitely help you with that issue sir.Do you have the ipod application open?
Iphonian: No the Ipod works fine. I'm calling about the real player application that you guys just approved.
Apple:ahhh Yes Sir.
Iphonian:I just downloaded the APP and its awesome!
Apple: Then I don't understand the problem sir. You say the Ipod works OK?
Iphonian: Yes.It works fine.The problem is with the Real Player...It doesn't work.
Apple: You can use the Ipod to play any music on your Iphone sir.
Iphonian: But you approved it! You have fix it!
Apple:Yes sir we did approve it because everybody would be mad at us if we didn't.You recall the Google thing right? Apparently we're no longer able to decide what the best user experience is for you.
Iphonian:But if it doesn't work then everybody else will be mad at you too.
Apple:Yes sir.We have already factored in both the negative and positive feelings of of our loyal fans to our economic model for next year.The income we receive from AT&T for the MMS and tethering charges will more than offset any losses we may incur over hurt feelings.
Iphonian:But I'm angry...My Real Player app doesn't work!
Apple:Yes sir.We were aware of your anger before you called.You'll have to contact the Real Player people for help with their application.
Iphonia:They said to call you...It's an awesome app!
Apple I'm sure the people at Real Player will be pleased to hear that....You Have A Nice Day Sir.