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back to article US military cyber force activated

The US air force held an activation ceremony in Texas yesterday for its new cyberspace combat unit, the 24th Air Force, which will "provide combat-ready forces trained and equipped to conduct sustained cyber operations". The 24th will be commanded by former Minuteman missile and satellite-jamming specialist Major-General Richard …

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WTF?

Screaming Fist

That has to be the worst name ever. The Septic military are such drama queens.

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Black Helicopters

Corto Might just have something to say about that.

Lets hope it's more sucessful than the original Screaming Fist or Corto might just have something to say about it.

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WTF?

67th

67th Network Warfare Wing ??

So the first 66 Network Warfare Wings weren't up to the job then? Or are they all busy hacking FaceTube or similar?

Never understood how the US military allocates these numbers, I'm sure it's intended to make it sound like the army/air force/whatever is bigger than it really is, and scare the Russians.

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Finally

All those years playing on the Playstation till 2AM have come into use.

Where do I put my X,X,square,triangle,triangle,triangle,L2+R2

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Re: Screaming Fist #

Guessing you missed the Neuromancer reference then?

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WTF?

Army/Navy/Air force origins?

I know this is probably more about accounting lines and empire-building as anything else, but does the existence of 3 different 'cyberwar' forces not strike others as a bit odd? Surely it needs one new agency to do this, or even just a spinoff from the NSA or something?

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Coat

So who is going to be the first?

to get a Screaming Fisting?

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@Mahatma Coat

Considering the nature of their battle ground (the Internet) I think Screaming Fist is highly appropriate.....

..think internet shock site.

Major-General Richard Webber (12:04):

Hey! Check this site!

Bin Laden (12:04):

?

Major-General Richard Webber (12:04):

http://screamingfist.mil/

Bin Laden (12:08):

OMG WTF?! Why would you send me that? Argh my eyes! Hows can....thats not even possible! How does that even fit??

Major-General Richard Webber (12:08):

HAHAHAHA, pwned by America, Bitch!

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Anonymous Coward

Ghostbusters

In other news, the US First Air Division A66 which has long warned Americans about the threat from Ghosts, today announced the formation of the 'GhostBusters" division.

Lt MoneyWaster announced "Americans need to believe that every time they see something in the dark, it's REALLY a ghost and we're here to protect them from it".

(Snip)

1. Don't connect any critical system to the Internet or other open network as Security 101. The Internet is connected to every script kiddies in the world, and by connecting to that network, you are connecting to every script kiddie and hacker and every country.

2. Don't buy any US network product, because there is a division of the US Airforce dedicated to hacking, which means now every US made router, US made OS etc. may have a backdoor for the hacking division of the US military. I know it's tough, but your job is security, and some gung ho warmonger attacking imaginary enemies is as big a danger as little Joe script kiddie looking for aliens on a Pentagon computer.

3. The first division seems to be worded vaguely enough to be a propaganda unit. 'information war' indeed! So are those officers for or against health care reform? Are they with the President or with Murdoch/Cheney/Fox?

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co-incidence

I've just started reading Neuromancer again (for the umpteenth time) - and that strapline made me smile :) Thanky.

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Big Brother

@Dan 10

"it needs one new agency to do this, "

You don't appreciate the thinking of the public service mentality. There is a lot of money to be spent on this, and those in charge of the various bodies know that they can get some of it to carry out approved tasks. The money will probably be ring fenced, but that's OK as it means that the department grows in size - therefore the people charge grow in stature as well.

For a better (and lengthier) explanation, read anything on Parkinson's Law - "Work expands so as to fill the time available for its completion"

This is why in the UK we have (so far) 18 different agencies working on digital security!

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Anonymous Coward

@Mahatma Coat

Yeah, "Lucky Alphonse" is a much better name.

p.s. Surely "Mahatma Kane Jeeves"

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Stop

and how are these guys going to get through basic?

I can't really see the borderline aspies who're actually going to do this cyber warfare sh*t getting through the whole 'twenty push-ups - on your knuckles' business.

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Coat

And another one...

...who'll be dusting Neuromancer off.

/the one with the Ono-Sendai in the pocket, if you would.

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Pint

@chphi Real exercise is soo last century

As these will be virtual warriors preparing for virtual war, they can do SimBasic.

Think of the cost savings. Cyberbases won't need to allocate expensive land for running tracks, sports fields, ranges. All this can be collapsed into a 19" rack in a dorm block with attached 24-hr minimart and pizza franchise.

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Happy

@ William Claude Dukenfield

I'll see your Lucky Alphonse and raise you these:

https://secure.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/wiki/Operation_Abstention

https://secure.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/wiki/Operation_Seagull

:)

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Flame

As a fi(r)st exercise

Maybe they should start practicing with spammers...

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Black Helicopters

Consequences of military bureaucracy

Now that they have these military units, those units are going to protect their own existence.

So they need a threat. They need enemies. If enemies do not exist they will have to be created. Realistic threats and attacks will have to be discovered, whether or not there actually are any.

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Linux

NETFORCE

Anyone ever read Tom Clancy's NETFORCE novels? Sounds oddly familiar.

Mines the one with the VR Headgear in the pocket

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@ twelvebore

'Never understood how the US military allocates these numbers, I'm sure it's intended to make it sound like the army/air force/whatever is bigger than it really is, and scare the Russians.'

Actually that's a pretty good question - possibly Lewis (the Reg's defence/defense/alien jellyfish) correspondent can explain how the US Army allocates numbers to regiments. Like how come they've got a 101st before a 67th?

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Never understood how the US military allocates these numbers...

> "Never understood how the US military allocates these numbers, I'm sure it's intended to make it sound like the army/air force/whatever is bigger than it really is, and scare the Russians."

This is precisely the reason. The Brits do the same and have been doing since time immemorial. Hence the reason why the SAS is the 22nd regiment, when being generous its the size of a couple of companies.

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FAIL

How cute...

that they officially intend to do what they're accusing McKinnon of having done, yet describe themselves as an"Elite Unit".

Are ALL US politicos/Pentagon types lobotomised?

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Flame

Finally, the real Chair Force uncloaks

>> Anyone ever read Tom Clancy's NETFORCE novels?

I'm avoiding Tom Clancy's fairy world like Disneyworld.

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Anonymous Coward

clank

Reminds me of the first black ic in Cyberpunk or was it ShadowRun? It didn't work out too well for the professionals.

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@AC 19th August 2009 11:17 GMT

"2. Don't buy any US network product, because there is a division of the US Airforce dedicated to hacking, which means now every US made router, US made OS etc. may have a backdoor for the hacking division of the US military"

But aren't all the "US network products" actually manufactured in China? As the Chinese are accused by Western intellignece agencies of being highly active in cyber warfare, wouldn't the backdoors be for them?

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Heart

Screaming Fist

Sometimes the leaders on the front page are so appealing, I click them even if I'm not interested in the article. This has to be one of them.

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Thumb Down

Don't you remember how Screaming Fist ends ?

The answer is, badly.

Over Kiev. When the force is wiped out by Russian EMP weapons.

Those who do not learn from history (real or future) are likely to repeat it.

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RW
Terminator

@ Gordon 10

Those aren't screams. They're ululations of ecstasy. Please adopt Proper Terminology when writing about Depraved and Perverted Shenanigans.

Where is the ManfromMars icon when you need it? Moderatrix, moderatrix, help!

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Pirate

Considering that they are an infowar unit...

How many doubt that they are actually based in Lackland, Texas, and have outposts in Georgia and Oklahoma?

Probably all the officers will simply be uploaded to the net, work from encrypted military satellites, and will perform their duties by downloading themselves direct into the enemy's head via tightly focused pink laser beams and swarms of nano-bots.

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Joke

Screaming Fists?

How about Fisting Screams?

Anyhow how about an inaugural big publicity first mission?

Take out all those flipping gold farmers and gold spammers in WoW. They are really annoying me with their spam.

They will after all be defending a very 'worthy' American asset.

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Silver badge

Air Force Space Command ?

Are they so desperate for work that they need a totally land-based infrastructure to work against ?

I mean, really, why is it that the Air Force gets to play with this so-called Elite section ? Sounds to me like another case of inflated ego. I'm sure the Army could have done the job just as well.

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Operation Screaming Fist

I guess we know what kind of vids these geeks like to watch then..?

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Anonymous Coward

More firewalls required

Thanks for the warning! If the typical American propensity for "friendly fire" continues the world

will not have to worry only about our allies being killed by their own comrades, but the entire community of internet users, including many governments, will now need to fear these cyberspace warrriors. How long before the Pentagon finds its internet connection has been accidently knocked out? Perhaps the best plan would be to ring the US territories with firewalls to contain their activities. As a beneficial by-product the majority of the world would find that spam suddenly decreases by some 60% !

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Megaphone

Cluttering the information huh?

"applying and transitioning counter information technology"

Well that's what proves they hire professional blog-haters to distort general discussion on the web too. No wonder you see so many rude and redundant hate statements on YouTube now a days.

They publicly advertise they will engage in internet-disinformation campaigns at the expense of the tax payers again.

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