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back to article Australia's 'answer to the velociraptor' unveiled

Australian media report that three "new dinosaurs" have been discovered at a "prehistoric billabong dating back 95 million years". Aussie paleontologists have stated uncompromisingly that their down-under dinos would easily win in a fight with soft poofter aeons-dead antediluvian lizards from other, less fortunate nations. In …

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Coat

"A Wintonensis

has been dubbed "Banjo" by the Queensland authorities"

A particular British Winton was dubbed "Banjo String" for far more sinister reasons...

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Joke

If they were bigger and better...

.. how come they died sooner?

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transportation?

How do they know that these weren't actually British dinosaurs who emigrated there for better weather and prospects, or criminal dinosaurs transported there against their will for stealing iguanadon eggs?

As dinosaurs were first discovered (ok identified) in Britain, it's clear that dinosaurs are in fact (mostly) British, and that all other dinosaurs are colonial descendants or inferior foreign dinosaurs that could only be communicated with by roaring very loudly and slowly.

the Moon is British too.

all of these icons and not a single dinosaur or Union Jack icon to be found

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Anonymous Coward

You know spielberg ....

He doubled the size of the raptors to make them look impressive.

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FAIL

pffft

Fancy not knowing who Banjo Patterson was, you will be saying next that you have never heard of Henry Lawson either

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Silver badge

@ Anonymous Coward and @ Spielberg while I'm about it

'He doubled the size of the raptors to make them look impressive.'

He did, then the palaeontologists went and uncovered Utahraptor which stood up to 2m tall and is best described as combined the cuddly nature of the great white shark with the contents of Gordon Ramsey's knife rack.

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It doesn't quite work

Tie me Australovenator Wintonensis down sport.

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Bronze badge
Boffin

Name calling

> Australovenator Wintonensis

The correct form for a Linnean taxonomic binomial is to capitalize the genus, and leave the species in lower case.

Thus: Gyps himalayensis. Or whatever.

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Coat

This Austrian Lovenator

Bruno will be proud

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Silver badge

What big arms you have Grandmother

If you look at a whole T Rex, the arms look small. If you visit the natural history museum and walk up to the arm bones mounted on the wall, they are impressively big - even if you are 6'5".

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Happy

@Tawakalna

"How do they know that these weren't actually British dinosaurs who emigrated there for better weather and prospects, or criminal dinosaurs transported there against their will for stealing iguanadon eggs?"

There's no evidence of excessive dinosaur whining "its not like that TV show Neighbours is it!!!"

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Joke

Obviously they needed longer arms...

...cos a T. Rex would get horribly burned trying to turn a brontosaurus steak on the barbie with those tiny little ones.

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FAIL

FYI

The Courier Mail is a complete arse-rag of a publication with Daily Mail style "this is scandalous" empty rhetoric and pointless rambling articles. The grammar and spelling are typically atrocious with articles looking like the result of a pissed browse of Wikipedia combined with a hint of Googling. Facts are innocent bystanders. The "journalists" employed therein would appear to be a product of the equally atrocious Queensland state education system.

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Australovenator?

Wasn't that Arnie's name when he was doing softcore porn?

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Grenade

@ VoodooForce

"There's no evidence of excessive dinosaur whining "its not like that TV show Neighbours is it!!!""

It's definitely a true blue Aussie dinosaur...when the bones were being checked they found a very large chip on its shoulder.

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Grenade

No, these are Aussie dinos

They also found evidence of a crashed vehicle, 48 empty containers of something called "Lava-lager" and some primitive Dino-roo shooting weapons....

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Bronze badge
Flame

Australian? So presumably...

It's deadly poisonous as well?

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It was too much to expect...

Since they named one "Clancy" and the other "Banjo", one might have been foolish enough to think that Wintonensis was a reference to the West Australian novelist Tim Winton. But this would require:

1. these guy actually reading novels, and

2. look beyond Queensland.

Silly me. Winton is a place in Qld...

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Happy

@Tawakalna

Darn right. Also you can tell they're not British dinos, because when they arrived on the Qantas flight the whining sound stopped when they turned the engines off. Which isn't the sound that you hear when the plane is full of backpackers and holidaymakers.

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Welcome

What's in a name

I for one welcome the use of Banjo, Clancy and Matilda to name things uniquely Australian.

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Clancy

FWIW, "Clancy of the Overflow" was a poem by Banjo P.

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Boffin

@ Jonathan Richards

Partially correct understanding of Linnean binomial nomenclature.

You are correct in stating the genus first letter should be capitalized, however the second part of the name is more correctly known as the specific epithet this together with the genus names the species.

Pendant interject over.

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Gold badge

Big arms?

T-Rex arms look a deal less silly when you see a rendition of a T-Rex done since they figured out that they have had dino-porkiness rather exaggerated in the past, due to using the wrong algorithm for estimating overall mass from the skeletal structure. This was discovered recenty when somebody applied the accepted method to an elephant skeleton and found that the buggers came out as damned nearly spherical.

What we're used to is apparently the paleontological equivalent of the Segway owner's club.

All those icons and no dino fat bastard. What an oversight.

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FAIL

Deinonychus not Velociraptor

Geez. Velociraptors were fairly small - the one's in Jurrassic Park were actually Deinonychus, but that name didn't sound vicious enough for Crichton.

The Queensland Courier-Mail sounds like a top quality rag.

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Welcome

Why they died earlier:

Very easy: unlike all other australian species they were not poisonous like hell.

Welcome, pretty welcome to Autralia, where even the stone try to bite you.

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Coat

"That isn't a velociraptor..."

"THIS is a velociraptor!"

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