...is that FoTW. It was well written, has NO CAPS ON ALL WORDS and is factually correct....

... A sense of humour...

That guy is a twat.

Crikey, someone's got their knickers in a twist.

As a side note, I didn't find the article poorly written at all.

Can I be the first to welcome our swedish muslim non-porn fire-breathing overlords? Oh, and its a pity that techidude doesn't know how to use google, or he would have found that he spelt "Teresa Orlowski" wrong.

Paris, because she may know more about Swedish movie making than all of us.

failed to use the proper amount of caps, exclamation marks and swearing for a true FOTW.

"absolute lack of news value and displays the English media as an utterly poor performer in regards to research and proper ethical command"

Sounds like the British press to me, El Reg is always much better.

And here me being English i thought that sweden only exported cuckoo clocks, didn't realise it also had blokes that like to tell the world that there country is not full of fit, blonde, women.

Techiedude, sounds like a name my dad would make up to have a moan on the interweb, Dad is that you? Did you find your walking stick to wave at the yoof on your lawn?

Brilliant letter. Best part - one sentence extrapolated to 2 page answer.

Question: what happened Andrew? You're allowing comments being posted in your article... That doesn't happen very often.

that's worse than being a journo !

I'm with the 'this isn't a FoTW' camp.

I'm disappointed that they have been so thin on the ground of late; either you're not upsetting people enough anymore or you're not letting us see the correspondance you receive.

I'm off to spEakYou'rebRanes to take in some proper ranting

Not enough looney raving.

No bizarre capitalization.

Not nearly enough swearing.

Almost a fact included.

Sort of clear sentence structure.

No threats.

In other words, Orlowski is flaming himself to get some publicity and feel better for the week!

"a) Mr. Orlowski is only irritated that another company is larger than his own mothers company"

Is that true ?

Send us a wad of tapes / DVD's and I promise to keep my mouth shut and never mention it again.

Mine's the one with factor 145 sun screen in the poket

Actually a smut peddler is better than a journo. Have you ever tried whacking off to editorial?

Paris, 'cause she's smutty and I'd whack off to her.

Only one answer possible to 'techie dude'. The best way to chill out would be to sit down in front of some quality Swedish grumble flick. I always find that works for me.

For someone who was upset about being labeled as a producer of porn, he had no problem labeling all Muslims as non-blonde and non-blue-eyed. The world being what it is, I highly doubt there isn't at least one. I can only wonder how his fellow Muslim Swedes feel about being mentioned in a letter about pornography.

Having just returned from Stockholm, I can unequivocally confirm that Sweden is indeed full of fit blonde women, and that they are all "up for it" too. And we all know it's a small step from that to pr0n, right?

So it must be true.

As an aside, Paris is blonde and was "formed" in America so must also be Swedish!

The FoTW only seemed to miss the fact that it is all a Big Conspiracy. More paranoia next time please. Still, good effort. Keep it up!

Paris: Well, duh...

I have now cancelled my holiday to Sweden as it seems that it's not populated by 6' blond, blue eyed babes. How disappointing.

a) Mr. Orlowski is only irritated that another company is larger than his own mothers company,

Superb, just superb.

and somewhat familiar with the dry Swedish sense of humour, I suspect you might be having the piss taken out of you.

Those crazy Swedes!

Let's look at the el Reg FoTW criteria one at a time:

1. Leave your reason at the door

FAIL (he used some reasoning)

2. Don't make it too long

FAIL (it's too long)

3. ...don't read anymore [sic] than the first paragraph

FAIL (seems like he read the whole thing, possibly carefully or even twice)

4. Tie in your hatreds/prejudices

OK (he's got a problem with porn, and probably Muslims, and something Swedish)

5. For god's sake, don't start using correct grammar

OK (he starts off well, but deteriorates at the end)

6. Be deeply and personally abusive to the person you're writing to

OK (assuming Mr. Orlowski's mother doesn't actually run the porn company)

7. don't use too many swear words.

OK (I didn't catch anym, but I skimmed some of it)

8. Do not reread your flame.

OK (I'm guessing here, based on the grammar deterioration he didn't proof-read too much)

9. Celebrate a successful flame by killing something

OK (no idea really, but let's give him the benefit of the doubt)

I agree with AC that the almost complete lack of ALL CAPS lends a too proper and seriously uninflamed air to the email. However, I am convinced that, were el Reg to recieve a better selection of FoTW candidates, we (the reader community) would benefit from their publication more often. As it is, I think the amateurish and constrained feel of this (surely less than ideal) FoTW is due to a lack of more suitable material to work from.

Whether this lack is due to a sudden politeness fad, el Reg not publishing provocative enough articles, concentration of comments on Ms. Hilton or the new icons, a sudden inexplicable pandemia of sanity, or just plain reader apathy, is beyond my ability to analyze. But we are ALL to blame for not trying hard enough - a real FoTW is a work of art, and those just don't come about by chance...

Yet it was articulate, accurate, well-spelled and gramatically correct, all in what it appears is Technodude's second (or third?) language.

(Shame about the missing apostrophe, but I'll put that down to a transcription error.)

Why can't all Brits write as well as that?

Just a couple of things to add; I've been to Sweden and there are some stunning blonde women there - but not as many as in Denmark; secondly the other Scandinavian nations laugh at Swedes because of their lack of a GSOH - much like we like to think of the Germans.

This was demonstrated to me in a meeting in Stockholm where a single (non-British) guy around a large table shared jokes with us Brits while the rest were completely deadpan. After the meeting I discovered he was a sole Norwegian working with a large group of Swedes.

Although some of Sweden's top exports of the moment do seem to be either blonde or porn-related e.g Petra Eos Marklund AKA September , a blonde Swedish dance performer or Jonas Erik Altberg AKA Basshunter, also a Swede in the dance music biz. He's not blonde but he often has Aylar Lie in his videos, an Iranian-born former porn star. She is Norwegian rather Swedish - but it's all the same over there isn't it?

I love the "Goodbye!" at the end.. i imagine it being so cheerful and involving a smile and wave... haha.

Paris: Because she never complains ;-)

...on all my so-called Swedish Porn? I bought it thinking it was Swedish, all the blue eyed blondes and all, and it turns out most Swedes are now swarthy Middle Eastern types. Shouldn't there be truth in packaging laws on this sort of thing?

I'm appalled this hasn't been offered up as a prize yet, in fact I'm off down to wilkinsons to buy a cheap basket and fill it with smut, a wicker one me thinks or maybe plastic (i'm not sure yet).

WTH, THIS IS NOT A FLAME. Just bechause he can typ and he can read and he tells us ther are no 6 ft blond big busted swedes in Sweden and he think heis mother is a better porn star than his mom, BAH, hes to polite!!!!!!!!!!!

Why does porn production disgrace the country? The biggest producer in the world seems to be doing rather OK in several fronts, although things surely could be improved.

I also wonder whether this "FoTW" is itself a joke... Poe's Law!

Nope, asmuch as I have missed the FoTW and this being the closest thing to it, I would have to say that this is not one. About the only thing it has going for it is the personal attack on Mr. Orlowski's mother. We really should stick to the rules here.

...ever heard of the Private Media Group?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Private_Media_Group

I suspect they moved to Spain for tax reasons.

..what a smut-basket is but I want one!!!

I would like register a complaint. Since when has producing smut disgraced my beautiful country of Denmark? He must be Swedish alright, they get their knickers in a twist over nothing these days. Stay off the Pripps Blå and get some serious beer into your system, dude. You sound like you need it.

@Mike Howell: Well done, that man.

> Actually a smut peddler is better than a journo. Have you ever tried whacking off to editorial?

Nah but I understand many journos do (to their own)