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back to article Steve Jobs finds part-time work

Steve Jobs has returned to work a full day before Apple's oft-promised "end of June" deadline. Jobs, though, is not back in a full-time capacity. Apple chief executive and co-founder will instead be a part-timer until further notice. The company refused to say how many days a week Jobs will be putting in. Heck - Apple’s just …

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  1. WhatWasThat?
    Joke

    Replacement Liver

    Is there any word yet on the [recently hired] Apple employee who was the donor? Are they back to work yet?

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  2. Ian Ferguson
    Jobs Halo

    Anticipation

    In true Apple style, everyone will be expecting him to arrive back in massively good shape, with bulging muscles, several new features (extra penis, triple liver for durability), and having undergone huge amounts of cosmetic surgery to look incredibly attractive.

    In reality, he'll turn up with a slightly stronger liver and the ability to play the penny whistle (although only to songs from selected record companies)

    :-)

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  3. Anonymous Coward
    Troll

    Jobs to live forever :)

    Who doesn't think Jobs will live forever given that arguable a lot of Apple fanbois would be willing to give an arm and a leg (maybe other organs too) for him to be the eternal Apple leader?

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  4. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Could fanboys really tell?

    Couldn't you just commission an animatronics replica to babble out a few stock phrases at shows and otherwise have a committee issue bulls ostensibly signed by him? If you replaced Steve Jobs with a jar of Folgers Crystals, would anybody be able to tell in a blind taste test? As with almost everything else at Apple, isn't this basically more show than substance? I say we prick this supposed "Steve Jobs" with a pin and see if he deflates.

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  5. Steve Evans

    @WhatWasThat?

    Given that the human body only contains one liver, I doubt the donor will be doing anything bar decomposing!

    Now kidney's they're different, humans come with a spare, and if you donate one, the other will actually enlarge to help deal with the load.

    Sorry to shoot your joke down - it did amuse me... Honest!

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  6. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    @AC 22:09

    You might want to read up on Mr. Jobs' work history. You can argue whether he's made good decisions, or been a good boss - but to deny that he's had a powerful and unique influence on people and products is delusion.

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  7. Anonymous Coward
    Pint

    I can see Steve ...

    a thousand years from now as a sort of a head-in-a-jar affair (like in Cold Lazarus or Futurama) with tubes coming out of his nose and cables cascading from the neck stump -- he'll still be hanging on in there as CEO.

    Mark my words.

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  8. Anonymous Coward
    Big Brother

    Wait, wait, wait

    Steve actually does stuff? I thought his Steviness was just there to be the crazy guy with power no power to distract people away from the person who does, Much like Ballmer and Zaphod Beeblebrox

    Big Brother, because of the weird commercials that made no sense....

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  9. Mike 119
    Boffin

    @Steve Evans

    You dont need to be dead to donate a liver. Only part of it is used, as it is still viable if cut in half. So someone may very well be walking round with half a liver, the other half in jobsie.

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  10. Anonymous Coward
    Alien

    @Steve Evans

    Actually one can donate part of a liver - they regenerate.

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  11. Valan Chan

    Normally takes months... he did wait months

    Saying that it normally takes months and then telling us he only had to wait months is wasting our tie reading it.

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  12. TeeCee Gold badge
    Joke

    @George Schultz

    Not if you shoot it with silver bullets it doesn't.....

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  13. peter garner

    It was probably ..

    .. a lot easier to install than one of those Apple batteries.

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  14. steogede

    RE: @WhatWasThat

    >> Given that the human body only contains one liver, I doubt the donor will be doing anything bar decomposing!

    Yes you only have one liver, but you don't need a whole one - and I believe they generally they will regenerate. It is possible be be a living donor by giving someone some of yours. Take a look at http://www.theregister.co.uk/2005/05/20/live_liver_transplants/

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