back to article Fans decry tennis gal's breast-slash plan

Rising Romanian tennis star Simona Halep is facing popular opposition to her plan to reduce her breasts, which she describes as an "uncomfortable" impediment to optimum performance on the court. The 17-year-old junior French Open champ - whose vital stats are: height 5ft 5in; world ranking 264; cup size 34DD - confirmed: "This …

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  1. Studley
    Heart

    online petitions never work

    ...thank the lord.

  2. John70

    Nice rack-et

    And her form looks good.

  3. J
    Paris Hilton

    I think

    Well, she could also consider a change in career in a year or two...

  4. D@v3

    i agree

    they do look like quite a distraction

  5. Richard

    What a waste it would be.

    If she has a boyfriend, I'm sure you'll find his name on the petition.

  6. Pierre

    The Lord giveth...

    ... and the plastic surgeon taketh. A big loss for the Tennis and Entertainment Industry, Inc. -which seems to prefer skinny supermodel-like Russian starlets anyway. I'm still off to sign the petition though.

  7. Chizo Ejindu
    Paris Hilton

    Can i be the first to say...

    Fwap... i mean bap... i mean BACKache may be a real problem for her, to further her career its probably the right move :)

    Paris, because she's put her back into furthering her career :P

  8. Frank Bough
    Unhappy

    Sad

    There's something very wrong with the world when a woman will mutilate herself for such a ridiculous reason.

  9. Richy Freeway
    Thumb Up

    IT Angle?

    IT? Eh? Where am I? I'm not even sure what game she's playing.

  10. Steen Hive

    Unit war

    Time to abandon old, Imperial Bulgarian airbags and replace them with shiny new metric Romanian ones, methinks.

  11. Pete Rowley
    Thumb Up

    Heheh

    IT angle? It was the camera angle I was more concerned about.

  12. John Robson Silver badge
    Paris Hilton

    sports bra?

    Might help here - and I'm sure some sports bra manufacturer could come up with something better than she is wearing there, and get advertising out of it!

  13. Luis Ogando
    Thumb Up

    Services

    Well, in an act of TOTAL selflessness, I'd like to offer my services as her personal Jub-restrainer. I'll run around behind her, offering full support from my (pre-warmed) cupped palms to ensure her wubbas don't boing around too much.

  14. regadpellagru
    Joke

    What to say ?

    I'm breast^H^H^H^H^H^Hspeachless.

  15. Anonymous Coward
    Stop

    I know how she feels

    Not having 70ft long legs has really held back my ambitions to compete in the high jump. But as soon as I get the surgery I feel certain that my natural abilities will allow me to smash the current world record.

  16. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    B-B-B-B-Bad To The Bone

    By chance I watched this clip while listening to Bad To The Bone by George Thorogood And The Destroyers. The mesmeric rhythm of the video synchronised perfectly with the beat of the song, not to mention the two lasted almost exactly the same time.

    What's going on there?

  17. Anonymous Coward
    Unhappy

    Career longevity?

    If life give you lemons, make lemonade.

    Kournikova forged a pretty decent modelling career once she gave up that tennis nonsense, and she was doing a lot better in the world rankings than this girl was.

    (I've just realised how terribly sexist that sounds)

  18. Anonymous John
    Unhappy

    What about the Amazon warior women?

    They were supposed to have cut the right ones off to make archery easier.

  19. Scott Mckenzie

    Bouncy Bouncy!

    Brilliant guys... you can tell it's Friday that was excellent...

    Though i do have to question her reasons, clearly she does just fine with them as they are!

  20. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Fuck the IT angle

    I'm off for a quick one off the wrist.

  21. Ke

    We don't need no stinking title.

    In all fairness they're far from proportional to her body.

    The first step to bio-engineered / enhanced athletes?

  22. Wokstation
    Joke

    Balls!

    She can play with... *SMACK* Sorry Mrs Wok... erm... I was watching tennis dear. What do you mean I don't like tennis? I do now, I think it's quite *SMACK* sorry dear, sorry... sorry...)

  23. Anonymous Coward
    Coat

    Any...

    more than a mouthful is a waste.

    Mines the one with calipers in the pocket.

  24. Christoph

    The IT angle is obvious

    There are going to be a *lot* of spams using this as a come-on.

  25. Geoff Webber
    Paris Hilton

    hmmm

    for me the footage was spoilt by the needless tittering from the audience.

    Paris.............. she has balls as well

  26. Frank

    Needs Some Dampers

    It's quite a problem for women involved in jumpy/bouncy sports. The girl needs in line dampers in place of her bra straps it seems. I don't know anything about this subject area but I'm sure she must be able to get a better sports bra than whatever she's using?

  27. Anonymous Coward
    Alert

    How on earth...

    ... is a straight read blooded bloke supposed to comment on a story like this without risking a lifetime ban from the Moderatrix?

    Well, I couldn't play tennis that well if I had those things bouncing around in front of me. I have enough trouble with the middle aged spread bouncing around...

  28. calagan
    Thumb Up

    Pleeeeeease sign the petition!!

    Pleeeeeease sign: tennis would be "flat" without it

    http://www.petitiononline.com/sisice/petition.html

  29. Armus Squelprom

    An Unfortunate Situation

    Okay there's no denying the majesty of those norks, but they're really not compatible with top-level tennis. She's done incredibly well to achieve so much already, after the surgery she'll be even better.

    But still, it's a crime against humanity....

  30. kain preacher

    Not even worth it

    Only people that are complaining are men. This is not even worth a mention

  31. Anonymous Coward
    Paris Hilton

    After reviewing the evidence...

    I agree that from our* point of view the reduction surgery is going to be a real shame. If only she could go for helium additions to reduce the weight *and* ensure perkiness in the future! Alas I'm guessing it's the momentum more than the weight which is causing her issues.

    Real fans of the lass should go for a different approach.

    Set up a fund with enough cash in it for her to reverse the surgery. If she gets to 200th position she gets the cash, if she doesn't the fund gets used as suggested.

    *male interested in the female half of the species

    PH - because deep down inside we're all in favour of women getting on top

  32. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Romanian Airbags?

    Doesn't quite have the same ring to it as 'Bulgarian Airbags'. Maybe she was just jealous when Bulgaria joined the EU at the same time as Romania last year...

    IT Angle? The footage was on YouTube - there you go...

  33. Anonymous Coward
    Happy

    This looks to me like

    Entrapment. You draw our attention to a woman tennis player's breasts (so far, so meeting the readership's needs of news from the cutting edge of IT) and entice us to make comments.

    I just know if I do comment I'll get pounced on by la moderatrix. You're not getting me like that again. I thought the resolution and date transfer rates of the youtube video were pretty poor, although I recognise traffic rates affect the user experience.

  34. Doug Glass
    Paris Hilton

    NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!

    If she does that the phrase "Tits up" will have such diminished impact.

    Paris because ... well ... Paris would never.

  35. Anonymous Coward
    Unhappy

    They do look rather uncomfortable.

    I have to say apart from their purely aesthetic value I can see why she would be troubled by them.

    They bounce much and no mistake.

    I presume she has tried the best athletic bras on offer and found no relief.

    Good luck to her I say....

  36. Anonymous Coward
    Happy

    and of course

    a 20 second click wouldn't have been sufficient so you went for the 5 minute one

  37. Anonymous Coward
    Heart

    Arghh

    Sod the IT angle, what about the humanitarian angle? Big boobs like that and STILL underage in the US! Luckily us Brits get to look at those boobs without fear of the Jail Bait mentality!

  38. Absinthe_Nishi
    Happy

    I'm sorry, but they're...

    ...exquisite!

    Whilst I understand her reasons for the reduction op, it's still a bit of a shame to change such a fantastic figure purely so she can be better at her sport.

  39. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Up

    More than a handful is a waste

    That is all

  40. ThinkingOutLoud
    Paris Hilton

    Where do we sign?

    I'll be happy to hold them for her to relieve any stress... Must watch more tennis.

    Paris because she could do with whatever gets chopped off.

  41. Chris C

    Hypocrisy

    "Rising Romanian tennis star Simona Halep is facing popular opposition to her plan to reduce her breasts, which she describes as an 'uncomfortable' impediment to optimum performance on the court."

    I find it intriguing that we (society) have no problems with women inserting silicone or saline into their bodies to increase the size of their breasts, and we have no problem with women removing fat from their body to make them slimmer, and yet, for some reason, we have a problem when a woman wants to reduce her breast size. Why? I know that a lot of men think "bigger is better", but is that the only reason? Why do we care at all?

    Being a male, I can only imagine how uncomfortable an impediment it is. As well as the discomfort and added strain on her shoulders and back, it provides real physical disadvantages, specifically inertia. As she moves, her breasts move; when she stops, inertia will cause her breasts to keep moving, effectively exerting additional force on her body, pulling it in the direction of the movement. A super-heavy-duty sports bra may help, but I would think that would cause even greater discomfort and restrict her movement.

    Simply put, it's her body, and she needs to do what's right for her, not what society wants her to do.

  42. Manas Straw

    I for one ...

    welcome our protuberance encumbered overlordesses!

  43. Anonymous Coward
    Happy

    Lubbly Jubbly...

    Hmmmmm Yummy

    Puting a knife to those would be a crime against babys...

    now you would'nt condone child abuse now would you...

  44. Alex C
    Go

    Who could possibly complain?

    Aside from being slightly pervy its far more interesting than Andy vs Tipsy over on the Beeb at the moment.

  45. bluesxman
    Coat

    Curmudgeon speaks

    In the Yorkshire vernacular of course...

    What's T'IT angle?

  46. Geoff Campbell Silver badge
    Paris Hilton

    Utterly gratuitous bouncing norks footage....

    ....excellent work, keep it up.

    Paris, for reasons that probably need little explanation.

  47. Jamie
    Linux

    That is good quality journalism

    See, it is not that hard to take the time to properly investigate the story and to get some media to help bring the story home.

  48. Chris
    Go

    Solution

    Maybe a technology based solution could help, some sort of robot hands that move to counter act any imbalance caused caused from the motion of the breasts.

    Further Research is definitely required. Maybe we should get her in for a consultation?

  49. Burch

    Can I be the fifth person to say

    new balls pleas?

    Cheers

  50. Blubster
    Thumb Up

    Dear lord!

    It's a wonder she hasn't knocked her own teeth out.

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