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Kanye West doesn't have a f***ing Twitter, OK?

American rapper and record producer Kanye West has issued a shouty missive against Twitter for allowing a bogus account carrying his name to amass more than one million followers on the microblogging site. The star, who is not known for his zen-like calm or restraint, ranted on his blog yesterday in which he accused Twitter of …

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Jasmine Strong
Heart

He's still

a gay fish.

jeremy

good on him...

... really, too many websites take a lax attittude to many things that would not be allowed in the real world... only changing things when forced.

So twitter doesn't make any money... well its a fairly poor business then, but it does not excuse not acting like a real business and complying with real responsibilities.

If i went into a bank and declared i was Kanye West (not just called that, but claiming i was actually this angry, marginally talented american man) then that would be illegal. Simple.

p.s. twitter sucks... i dont care what some nobody is doing, nor do i even care what my friends are doing when i am not with them.

Anonymous Coward
Flame

a title

ANGRY INTERNET MAN IS ANGRY

Anonymous Coward
Unhappy

A few points worth noting

Firstly, who cares what he's up to?

Secondly, who cares if it's a fake Kanye on Twitter?

Thirdly, who cares about Twitter?

Fourthly, Can ye just shut up? (see what I did there?)

Anonymous Coward
Gates Horns

'sif twitter's useless now!

If Twitter's only purpose was to lead to a point in space-time where Kanye wrote that rant, then I guess it's useful for something after all.

This post has been deleted by its author

James Greenhalgh
Joke

What I don't understand...

...Is why anyone would want to follow a gay fish on twitter anyway...

Bad Beaver

I hear

Mr. West loves fishsticks.

K
Paris Hilton

Does he still like fish sticks?

Hey, do you like fish sticks?

Jonathan

Wow....

What a class act, great guy. Truly the voice of his generation.

In fact, maybe thats no joke and he really is the voice of the internet generation. He flames, hes a troll, he posts in all caps, he acts like a noob half the time, he has an ego the size of Paris, and has a rudimentary at best grasp of the English language.

Anonymous Coward
Anonymous Coward

@Jasmine..

I heard it's true!

Bassey

Being creative?

Seriously? He spends most of his time being creative? I was travelling in a car with Radio 1 (shudder) on when what sounded like a Cher parody came on. I and the driver were pissing ourselves laughing. It was only afterwards, when the DJ announced something along the lines of "And dat was ye main man Kanye West keepin it real bruvver" that we realised it wasn't a piss-take.

This post has been deleted by a moderator

Goatan
Joke

Do you like fish sticks??

Do you like fish sticks in your mouth?

What are you, a Gay Fish??

Anonymous Coward
Coat

In before...

I FOR ONE WELCOME OUR CAPS LOCK WIELDING TWITTER HATING RAPSTAR OVERLORDS

Big Duke Six
Coat

Damn my job!

Been away from my PC - now I've missed all the gay fish action.

The one with the box of fish sticks in the pocket, thanks.

Jo

@ bassey

any tune with vocoder employed sounds like a Cher tune.

Everyone (sorry, i mean EVERYONE) is using Vocoders now in their new releases. net net - every tune sounds like cher or Metal Mickey on ketamine at a karaoke nite.

We always knew pop would eat itself.

NogginTheNog
Thumb Up

Good call

Actually I rather liked what he wrote (even if he did make it so much harder to read in CAPS). Who want's to know what someone else thinks, where they are, how good their dump was that morning, and all the other banal disposable crud they feel they need to flush out to all their "followers"?!

Good call Kanye for wanting to not be famous ALL the time.

Mark C
Thumb Up

Always thought he was a tosser

but he's just gone up in my estimation .... top rant!

(still a gay fish, obviously)

MahatmaCoat
Happy

@ Jonathan

"he has an ego the size of Paris"

France or Hilton?

zerofool2005
Pirate

Creative?

Did he use spell check for that word?

"I'M ACTUALLY SLOW DELIVERING CONTENT BECAUSE I'M TOO BUSY ACTUALLY BUSY BEING CREATIVE MOST OF THE TIME "

Just like the time's that you sample other peoples music and use it as your own

Adam Salisbury
Joke

Hey...

Give the poor lyrical wordsmith and voice of a generation a break :P

Nate... just Nate
Thumb Down

anyone who doesn't know the difference

between THERE and THEIR deserves to die

"...DECEITFUL TO THERE FAITHFUL USERS"

very 'creative' use of the english language.

FAIL!

DirkGently
Joke

How do we know?

It could be a fake Kanye West who hacked his site and wrote the blog to try to bring down the real Kanye West who is really a Twitter addict.

Anonymous Coward
Coat

I DONT HAVE A FUCKING...

...TWITTER ACCOUNT EITHER, THE WORLD SHOULD FUCKING KNOW!!!!!

A.C cos the world don't care that I dont have a Shitter account

Richard Wharram

Gay Fish

Kanye West doesn't have time to Twitter as he's too busy creatively putting fishsticks in his mouth.

*roffle*

Is that what was on the Twitter ? Hope so. He may just explode.

C Yates
Thumb Up

If it hadn't have been for the South Park fishsticks ep...

... I wouldn't even have known who Kanye West was!

Now I can see they managed to capture the essence of such a creative god perfectly!! =D

Awaits the "do you like twitterRING?" jokes ^_^

Kev K
Pirate

Have seen the SouthPark epp

And other than the fact he is a rapper still have no idea who he is & have no interest in who he is as modern rap music all sounds shite to me

//feel like my Dad ranting about punk blog

Gav
Thumb Up

Well said, Mr West

Sure, spelling and punctuation was a bit wayward, but otherwise excellent rant with some valid points.

My estimation of him goes up. Although I should point out that my previous estimation wouldn't have dwarfed an atom. But still, step in the right direct.

raving angry loony
Alien

who?

Who the fuck is Kayne/Kanye West anyway? Never heard of him before today. Does anyone really care?

LaeMi Qian
Thumb Up

Putting the C in RAP

But I thought the rant was quite good - compared to the average 14yo internet ranter it was excellent!

(There is real RAP and there is CommercialRAP (C-RAP). I only like the former, but haven't heard any since the 80's.)

Oninoshiko
Flame

@raving angry loon

no idea.

Me either.

nope.

fill in for twitter and my responce still applies...

Anonymous Coward
Anonymous Coward

@Jo

>Everyone (sorry, i mean EVERYONE) is using Vocoders now in their new releases.

>net net - every tune sounds like cher or Metal Mickey on ketamine at a karaoke nite.

AutoTune shurely,

Cher's producers reportedly did make use of a vocoder type effect in adittion to the now ubiquitous Antares plug-in; also modern producers are not necessarily making use of the vocoder but "robotic" or artificially pitch corrected vocals are still the order of the day thanks to Antares AutoTune..

It's rather depressing; although the novelty of hearing gurgly heavily machine-corrected vocal lines juxtaposed with generic music has not yet worn off; it is all too obvious that sooner or later we shall look back on these times with similar views to those we currently hold on certain aspects of mid 80s tracks.*

*Due to some reasons... one of which involves the treatment of a hitherto innocent snare drum with a sickeningly metallic, dated, delay based effect commonly known as "reverb"

Chris C

Never heard of him

I have absolutely no idea who this person is. But then, I haven't listened to the radio in about nine years, and I don't follow the entertainment industries. All-in-all, though, what he wrote sounds pretty good to me, though it shows that he has no idea about Web 2.0. Seriously, he DOESN'T want the world to know what he does every second of every day? And then there's his appalling lack of txt-speak (not a single "u", "ur", "r", or "ne1" to be seen). Clearly, he will never be the voice of the next generation.

Serenity

I nominate the rant

for FotW. It meets all the criteria.

Winston Smith

@who?

Do you remember after Hurricane Katrina, that short video clip with Mike Myers staring dumbfounded as a clearly agitated man said "George Bush doesn't care about black people!"? That man was Kanye West.

Also, re: "IT MAKES ME QUESTION WHAT OTHER SO CALLED CELEBRITY TWITTERS ARE ACTUALLY REAL OR FAKE."

I'm sympathetic enough to Mr. West's problem of having his identity "stolen", but is this really the first time it ever occurred to him that some people *pretend* to be celebrities on the internet? Seriously? Has he actually *seen* the internet before? No wonder he's behind on delivering content...

To the Reg editors: I hereby request a "facepalm" comment icon. Or are we supposed to use Paris for that?

Anonymous Coward
Joke

zomg

Apparenlty gay fish is not only a gay fish, but also very angry. BUT I GIVE HIM CREDIT FOR BEING ABLE TO BLOG IN ALL CAPS. That takes real talent there Mr. West, bravo bravo /golf claps.

Goat Jam
Paris Hilton

Here is a fun game

Google "kanye west douchebag" into google.

Lots of "haterz" out there . . .

Paris, because she too wonders if her ego is the size of Paris

Tony Proudlove
Thumb Up

CAPS LOCK IS CRUISE CONTROL FOR AWESOME

What happened to a sense of humour? He even writes "BECAUSE MY CAPS LOCK KEY IS LOUD!!!!!!!!!". It's a tongue in cheek rant. There's humour in that post and everything he's saying about Twitter is correct.

That said, he fell off after Late Registration.

JC
Paris Hilton

But what if?

What if there is not only one man in the world named "Kanye West"? I can see if someone represents themself as the supposed celebrity but what if they just have the same name and followed his work because of the coincidence? What if their screen name is Kanye West Faker?

The point is, on a website that does not authenticate identity, only fools would trust they are speaking to a celebrity because the name resembles one IRL, making it fairly irrelevant what goes on there. Granted, it'll take a few court cases to work out the logistics of all this but it has to happen sooner or later.

Paris, because an imitation can be better than the real thing.

Christopher Ahrens

Someone is lyng here..

At the bottom of the article I saw a related story titled:

# Kanye West blames Gmail hijack for bisexual porn hoax (26 January 2009)

Where Mr. West clearly states that he does, in fact, have a twitter account.

Anonymous Coward
Stop

sheesh..

Everyone who keeps referring to Kanye West on South Park as fishsticks should get their facts right. Its fishdi$*s. So consider yourself fail.

Anonymous Coward
Anonymous Coward

Then one million people need to get a life.

Title says it all!

Anonymous Coward
Thumb Down

Vocoder

Cher didn't use a vocoder, it was autotune. The same thing Lady GaGa and countless others use.

Some of the less honest "artists" simply use it to keep their voice in key, rather than for some elaborate effect to disguise that they have a very ordinary voice or can't otherwise sing.

Sarah Bee
(Written by Reg staff)

Re: Vocoder

Cher probably used autotune, but there's some really obvious vocoder on some of her not very good 90s stuff. Vocoder is an effect that's meant to be heard (hideous as it is) - autotune is meant to be undetectable.

I'd be surprised if Lady Gaga uses it. Girl got pipes. She can actually sing very well.

wolfmeister
Unhappy

i know the feeling

yeah, some twat's taken my company and domain name on twitter - wrote to them, got back a non answer email telling me "if this isnt an answer, write to another department" - morons, thats my company and trade name on the www for 15 years ffs!

Anonymous Coward
Anonymous Coward

Hmm

I always thought hip-hop and intelligence (and use of language) were mutually exclusive concepts?

Sarah Bee
(Written by Reg staff)

Re: Hmm

That's a lazy view that borders on the dodgy, there. Hip-hop is a pretty broad church. Kanye isn't exactly the greatest example.

Anonymous Coward
Joke

No Twitter for Hitler either...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wd4WZ3LqCKw

Anonymous Coward
Stop

Busy Being Creative?

Busy trying to find someone elses material to shout over more like.

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