A Swedish man allegedly narrowly escaped castration by his former girlfriend, after he dodged the enraged ex's opening shot from an electric stun gun. The Local.se reports that the man had met with his ex to arrange the retrieval of some of his belongings. When he arrived though, he quickly realised the 26 year old woman from …
Voluntary genetic dead-end.
"whether they've inadvertently qualified themselves for Darwin awards by removing themselves from the gene pool remains to be seen."
We can only hope this is the case.
May I be the first to say...
...that castrating someone with a stun gun sounds like a load of bollocks.
OK, I'm going, don't push.
I wonder if she'll get a year in jail and a $3.8M fine?
After all, it sounds a lot more serious than assisting copyright infringement.
"....a prompt backwards lunge saved the man from a painful volting....''
Did he land badly? i.e. was that a painful vaulting?
So the lady is short of a date?
Anyone got her phone number and I'll see if she wants to go out
If these kind of stories continue, we shall certainly need a new icon. A 'Jolly Todger' perhaps.
Castrating with a stun gun?
Maybe not directly, but if the stun gun renders the target unconscious or at least immobile, then it gives the dear lady plenty of time to fetch a knife from the kitchen and do as she will.
I have to ask...
I mean, there is one; isn't there? Maybe its the ESD?
Lunge, feint, flick, riposte, retreat
"However, a prompt backwards lunge saved the man from a painful volting."
The lunge is distinctly a forward movement, the retreat is a backwards movement.
Please see http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fencing_terms for proper fencing terminology.
And if you don't believe me that fencing terms are appropriate, then answer me what terms are more appropriate when battling for or with your sabre/Épée/foil/penis.
Mine's in my coat pocket ready for the next duel.
Just don't look up
You know there are things that you wish you could un-see?
Don't search for it. Just don't.
Those YouTube vids
So let me get this straight. News story (unverified) talks about a somewhat implausible, possibly excruciatingly painful, method of self-harm and within a few hours there is enough volunteered video material on the net to fill maybe a half-hour slot on a late-night cable channel? Let's hope there are no TV execs reading this.
On the other hand, if you folks at El Reg are ever feeling mischievous, you now know that you simply have to write down your perverted fantasy (dressed up as a news story) and someone will act it out for you and post the video. Incredible!
Truly the aliens have landed and they are us.
- Top Gear Tigers and Bingo Boilers: Farewell then, Phones4U
- Breaking Fad 4K-ing excellent TV is on its way ... in its own sweet time, natch
- Stephen Pie iPhone 6: Most exquisite MOBILE? NO, it's the Most Exquisite THING. EVER
- Updated iOS 8 Healthkit gets a bug SO Apple KILLS it. That's real healthcare!
- Early result from Scots indyref vote? NAW, Jimmy - it's a SCAM