Or...
She'd probably just heard that Brazilians who wear heavy coats in inappropriate weather tend to get shot and wasn't taking any chances.
Brazilian ejected as lingerie arouses border staff suspicions
UK Border Agency officials in Newcastle were patting themselves on the back this weekend after they turned back a Brazillian woman, whose suitcase contained nothing more than a few T-shirts and an extensive collection of boudoir wear. The un-named 32-year-old was refused entry at Newcastle airport after border staff searched her …
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we want evidence...
I fully agree with paul, we would like photographic evidence or a reconstruction with playmobile.
An incident of this nature for us reg readers certainly warrants further investigation, im sure no one will object.
Wot no pictures?
If all she could arouse were their suspicions, then perhaps no pictures are needed
Can you imagine...
...if it was the other way around and one our Geordie pets was trying to gain entry in to Brazil? She would have ripped their heads off.
Mind you having seen, errr... been told about the sex workers of Geordie land I reckon a Brazilian version has to be a whole lot more attractive... With all due respect, of course <ahem>.
Oh look what I found...
http://www.roadjunky.com/article/542/a-brazilian-prostitute
but there again...
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1166728/Policewoman-moonlighted-100-hour-prostitute-entertained-20-clients-week.html
Hard work this research business.
@Paul Shemmell
That's exactly what I said to the wife when she accused me of seeing a Brazilian hooker...
An outrage?
We are forever bombarded with the notion that ALL immigrants to the UK are work-shy, layabout, good-fer-nothings, only here to milk our (shite) benefits system (and you would believe it, if you stoop so low as to read the Daily Heil)
Yet, here we have a woman arriving completely laden down with working clothes, and we turn her away?
so what,
she just had to throw in a jacket, top, trousers and chavvy wellies in the case and she'd have been let in? She's obviously not worth the money...
Mine's the burberry one, well at least i have one!
RIP Marilyn Chambers
Only 57 apparently, I guess she enjoyed life though.
Re: Can you imagine...
Thank you Juan for letting us share that charming and poignant account of an all-too-brief relationship.
Charming.
Obvious really...
If she'd flown in by private jet, she wouldn't even have been searched. Even easier if she'd come in by yacht.
Confused
How this lass expected to make any money when the average cost of gettign a shag in Newcastle is buying a voddy coke or a bottle of WKD.
Pass my coat I have pulled!
So that's what our taxes are spent on?!
So the borders agency is keeping ladies with minimal clothing out of the country instead of searching for terrorists. Waste of money!
<- I'll get her a coat ...
God I f*cking hate vista
I know it's unrelated, but it's just pissing me off so much today how useless, slow, and counter productive it is.
What I want is an MS vista team business analyst in a room, with me, my machine and a pick axe handle. Everytime she says, "You have to do it another way." or "We thought you'd be better off if you couldn't do it." I get to BEAT THE F*CKING BAS*ARD TO DEATH, and they bring another one in.
Please please please take it away. I can't take it anymore.
Damnit
They shouldn't turn away the ones with massive underwear collections - turn away the rough munters. The first step is improving the quality of hookers. :)
In fact, let's go further. Let us export our manky ones to Brazil. Cultural exchange! :D
Eh?
Have these border guards ever been to Newcastle city centre on a Saturday night? Her listed attire certainly fits with what most of the other lasses are wearing...
Unanswered questions
The interesting question is *why* did they search her suitcase in the first place, since they apparently found that she'd been refused entry *after* they had done so.
I'm assuming that it wasn't carry-on (fnar fnar) luggage, since it would not necessarily be unusual to provide for the essentials in case the main suitcase was lost.
If UK border control is in the (justifiable) habit of x-raying suitcases in their spare time, then I intend to abuse that :D
Small plastic bags of porage oats containing a single screw perhaps.
low tech?
So despite fingerprints, face recognition, and all the other high-tech paraphenalia that our tax money is being spent on, she still only got nicked, twice, because customs had a rummage through her knickers?
confused
I'm confused, why is this news? Surely this is exactly the sort of thing they should be doing every single bloody day? The way I read this story is that our border control has finally caught its first dubious traveller. So our govenments multi-billion pound investment in security amounts to this? Great, I for one will happily pay even more in taxes, keep up the good work.
Newcastle?
Having just been to Newcastle, I can confirm that lingerie and nothing more is the standard attire for ladies in the city centre, regardless of weather. Personally, I'm inclined to believe her.
Eh?
A Brazilian arrives at our Landing Strip and nobody, oh never mind
Parsing error
"Brazilian ejected as lingerie arouses border staff suspicions"
Stopped reading at staff, while wondering who the border was and where he was staying when he met the Brazilian with the lingerie, was she ejecting from a cake, wardrobe, etc.
Time for a quiet lie down now methinks...
@ Doug
Apparently, she'll take anyone too, for a nominal 'donation'.
Wow. I'm finding her work - does that make me a cyber pimp?
Mines the big fur coat.
Poor pet
She's probably seen some YouTube footage of a night out in the NE in the depths of winter and packed accordingly. It's a mistake anyone could make.
Don't get me wrong......
...... I think this is a great story, but since someone always asks this when the story is nothing about IT........ where's the IT angle here?
Perhaps the border staff in Newcastle emailed collegues in Belfast? Ahhh, maybe there's a database:
SELECT * FROM dodgy_sex_workers
WHERE locale = pt_BR and suitcase_stuffed_with_knickers = 1
She was clearly a terrorist!
Come on guys, border officials are there to protect us, lets cut them some slack! I for one feel allot safer knowing that young, scantily clad Brazilian women trying to enter our great country under false pretences will be kept at bay! As we all know, lingerie models between 18 and 30 are the prime demographic for fundamentalist bedroom behaviour and extremist sexual arousal! I doubt very much that she would be prepared to integrate into our society of not-having-wet-t-shirt-competitions-on-the-hot-beach and wearing-two-layers of clothing! Good work guys!
Hold on a tic...
If she wasn't carrying any explosives, or hair gel more than 50ml in capacity, or Swiss army knives, or plastic chopsticks, or wearing an incendiary t-shirt bearing the image of Optimus Prime, why did she get stopped in the first place? A single, brown-skinned woman who's been stopped and questioned at LAX (prior to 9/11) wants to know if this is a UK case of profiling?
Made my day
Way down here in New Zealand, your contributers have cheered me up after a hard day .(Messing about my section
About being aroused, if I was 50 years younger I probably would be.
Meanwhile.....
As another sales rep returns empty-handed, the Brazilian Board of Trade convenes to discuss just what it is they have to do to break into the UK's lingerie market......
Thank goodness
for protecting us from the strategic threat of Brazilian sex workers invading Newcastle. That reminds me that the Met police have already done a good job protecting us from Brazilian electricians too.
Now if they would only just stop harrasing opposition MPs, stop beating the cr*p out of peaceful (if maybe misguided) demonstrators, arresting photographers on the streets and would actually do something about Labour politicians selling peerages...
@Vladimir Plouzhnikov
You seem to be mistaken sir - from your name, I suspect you might not be a native of these shores.
What you must remember is that it is the duty of the police in this country to always be mean to anybody the government of the day does not like.
I mean, it's not like the mothers with pushchairs at the Poll Tax demonstrations were there to protest peacefully, was it?
The only difference this time is that the few policemen who went too far got caught. It's about time someone showed Jacqui and friends that having all these cameras around means that naughty behaviour is more likely to get punished... even if she and her minions would prefer it if only the public got "caught" rather than ZaNew Labour's "protectors of civil liberty".
If anyone could hook a generator up to Sir Robert Peel's grave, we wouldn't ned no steenkin' wind farms.
Brazillian. Sex worker.
Nope, can't think of a joke there...
Was she from Brazil
Or did they start calling her a Brazilian after searching her?
Mine's the dirty mac
Makes sense to me
Understandable, they have to protect the business of the british sex workers, haven't they?
Let's just compare two popular specimens, Giselle Bündchen and Fergy., as an example for what's on offer on the island and what's to have on other shores. :-)
Meu casaco é com um bilhete na Bahia.
Did she actually do anything wrong?
Is it actually illegal for someone to come to the UK to have sex? paid for or not.....As far as I am aware its not illegal to pay for or accept payment for sex. so why was she stopped? because the border guards 'dont like that sort of thing'?? are they just allowed to stop people for any old reason? Really dont know why they would even bother....what business is it of theirs if she is over here to get paid for sex?
Pequena correção
Volker;
Your brazilian phrase is slightly wrong. I'm not sure, but were You going for something like "Mine's the one with a ticket for (a card from Bahia?) Bahia in the pocket."
How about:
O meu é aquele, com uma passagem para a Bahia no bolso. (Mine's the one with a ticket to Bahia in the pocket)
Yes, I am Brazilian
No, we do not speak spanish
And Brasilia is the capital - not Buenos Aires, dammit! :D
@God I f*cking hate vista
Your Fairy Godfather's just arrived!!
http://www.howtoforge.com/running-ubuntu-on-windows-xp-with-portable-ubuntu
(Might work in Vista. Dunno, haven't tried. I'd rather be forced to pay to get the entire El Reg. staff 'Mullah'd' on a Friday night on my dole money than try that Vista dogpoo).
(Or laid by a Brazilian...Bloke.)
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