Quangocrats at the UK's advertising watchdog have thrown open the floodgates for women to have orgasms on British television before 11pm, albeit very quietly. The Advertising Standards Authority has dismissed a complaint about an advert for Durex Play O, described by its makers as a "pleasure enhancing gel for women". The ad …
"long squeaky bit in the middle", the climax of which is sometimes known as the "Queen of the Night 'F' "
Always wondered what the 'F' stood for, now we know...
"...the fact it was on Channel 4 made it unlikely that many impressionable children would have accidentally clapped eyes on it".
When I was an impressionable child (and Channel 4 had only just launched) the fact it was on Channel 4 would have made it much more likely that I would have seen it. Of course in those days you could see at a glance if a programme was worth watching - it had a red triangle in the top corner ;-)
Orgasm or not we will all be fast forwarding over it with our PVRs. Telly advertising is in trouble these days, and the public will not be tuning in to see simulated orgasmic titbits, not while the click of a computer mouse can unleash a tsunami of multifarious porn.
Glad to see they find the sight of someone having an orgasm offensive.
Or are they just offended by women doing so?
< Thumbs up icon, 'cos if you squint it looks an ickle bit like a todger! :-)
"the Reg defense and opera desk"
I like the idea of combining these two areas of human endeavour which belong together every bit as well as spotwelding jelly to a Moon rocket;
but - and like J-Lo, it's a big one...
can the Mighty Reg please make sure that 'defence' is spelled correctly?
Perhaps the Reg's forums moderator and part-time probation officer can be sent to give Joe a very stern talking to? Nothing too harsh, just get him to sit through Götterdämmerung without tearing his ears off.
I got my GF some of that "play O"
Now all she does is moan at me all the time!!
Those offended by a female orgasm...
...have probably never seen one for real, let alone caused one to occur.
IGMC - it's the one with the gag ball and gimp mask.
I'm going to heaven..
Because I watch five TVs at once and write down anything I see that might offend young children and compalin straight away, just like Jesus would do as it says in the bible
"Thy shall stick thy nose into thy neighbours business and judge what is offensive based on thy own limited views of the world"
Women having orgasms?
Wouldn't that imply that they are enjoying it? Shock! Horror! The world will fall apart if women realise they are allowed to enjoy sex. Everyone knows only prostitutes have orgasms because they are the only women who enjoy their sex.
Oh wait, that was the 19th century!
I'll buy that for a dollar
But I thought that love was all you need ..?
My girlfriend has been having TV orgasms for a long time now,
and sofa orgasms,
and coffeee table orgasms
...and it brings a whole new level of meaning to The Queen of the Night :-D
"... no nudity, except for male torsos. Which suggests that Play O is not quite all you need."
You can't have any pudding if you don't eat your meat?
Images in my mind.....
" for women to have orgasms on British television before 11pm, .."
Do they sit on it, or straddle it, or what?
"...made it unlikely that many impressionable children would have accidentally clapped eyes on it."
So what if they did? Two possibilities - either they already know what a silent female orgasm looks like, in case the commercial is the least of their parents' problems, or they don't, in which case it'll just look silly. I'm not sure why people assume that the slightest glimpse of an ambiguous sexual context will suddenly turn 8-year-olds into nymphomaniacs...
"The organisation also noted that the ad featured no nudity, except for male torsos. Which suggests that Play O is not quite all you need."
Can one of your investigative journalists ask the manufacturers if a male torso is required or will the product work with fingers and toys?
personally I think the Goldfish one is better ;o)
Can dudes have an orgasm on TV before 11PM?
They never watched Emmerdale?
These people seem to forget that most "impressionable young kids" aren't going to be up at 10pm and those who are, are either older or way ahead of anything on the ads.
Also, why on earth do they keep thinking that kids give a monkeys about this stuff? I can tell you from personal experience that even your average 10 year old knows what sex and related activities are but they're much more concerned with Hanna Montana. By the time they have any interest in the former, they'd probably storm off if you called them "young".
And as the subject says - don't they watch Emmerdale and Hollyoaks!? From what I've seen there's a lot more in those than any Durex O advert.
Before anyone questions the IT angle - this stuff works well with battery operated devices, and since there are now ones that you can control remotely, I guess that counts....maybe.
"Apparently the ad had originally been cleared to run only after 11pm, but an aggrieved viewer had spotted it on Channel 4 at the early hour of 10.05pm and promptly "challenged whether it was offensive and overly graphic to be broadcast"."
An aggrieved viewer? As in ONE?
Does that mean I can take down the BBC news all by myself if I decide that it is showing offensive and overly graphic content? I'm being serious here ... Scads of dead and mutilated bodies from the latest suicide bomber are, in my eyes, a hell of a lot more offensive than that a woman having an orgasm, which I don't find offensive at all!
And as a side note, I feel very, very sorry for the aggrieved viewer. Poor thing.
There are of course two arias for the Queen of the Night in the Magic Flute both with really high notes. One is near the beginning and the other much later in the work. Which one is the important one in this respect? Is the other aria merely a simulated orgasm? Or are they both simulated? Or both real? We need to know.
The ASA is an trade org, not a quango.
Get it right, the ASA has nothing at all to do with the government, and by calling them quangocrats you are implying that they are an actual regulatory body.
The ASA is about as much governmental as the likes of the RIAA of BPI - the ASA lets people think it is a regulator (to stop people asking for a real regulator to be set up), but in reality it is a trade body designed to take heat away from its member companies, whilst giving off an air that it keeps adverts in check.
The advertising industry realises how much it is hated by anyone who isn't a worm in a suit, and this is how they play it - it gets called "self regulation".
It is why adverts either directly or indirectly promising unlimited broadband never went away - the market for advertising comms is huge, and the advertising industry wouldn't slaughter one of its biggest cash cows.
What's an orgasm?
Wife replies: "I don't know, ask your father..."
Mines the one with Computer Shopper in the pocket.
What kinda saddo....
... makes complaints about adverts being 55 minutes earlier than allowed?
In fact before reading this I thought that the gloves were off after 9pm......
This is why El Registerrrr is the best rag there is.
'This piece is famous for its "long squeaky bit in the middle", according to the Reg defense and opera desk.'
As far as I know, no other IT magazine has a defense-and-opera desk. It's this deep coverage that keeps me coming back.
Paris, because you can read the previous line yourself.
how did those
Shampoo adverts get past this eagle eyed protector of the public virtue <AKA sad twat>?
What kinda saddo makes complaints about adverts being 55 minutes earlier than allowed?
Umm, the guy from Durex' PR company that got a bit pissed off that no-one was talking about their risque new advert and thought a quick call to the ASA might generate some free publicity?
Just a thought...
@ Ponder Stebbins
Were you there on any of those occasions?
All you need?
At £15 for an tiny bottle, this stuff is snake oil.
(Not of the one eyed trouser variety either. God, you lot have one track minds)
Ch4 - Red Triangle
Ah, good times.. good times... good times indeed, especially when I was an impressionable rap-scallion! i agree with Richard Thomas above!
More of these sorts of adverts please, to rid our sorry country of Prudish Behaviour!
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I tried sex on TV once, but we kept falling off.
@ Mr Brush
Here in the Emerald Isle it's 20 flippin yoyo's a bottle! Although I did get some a week ago - I was wondering aimlessly around the chemists waiting for a prescription and found myself staring at the big white box and had a read and couldn't resist.
The biggest shocker is when you open the big white box and find the tiny little bottle inside >.< And like all their other products, all the thing does is tingle warm and cool at the same time o.O
I rated this story as "Oh Orgasmic", obviously!
I rated this story as "Oh Orgasmic", obviously! Don't need my coat, I'm naked!
PLEASE tell me that's a made up name.
"Defense" is the correct spelling: that is how the Americans spell it, and they have all the cash for defense. So they win.
Q: How do you tell if a woman is faking an orgasm?
A: Who cares.!