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back to article Microsoft: Vista desktop key to life fulfillment

Forget rummaging through colleagues' drawers - if you really want to know what kind of person the man or woman you're working with is, just look at their desktop. So claims psychologist Donna Dawson, who was this week called in by Microsoft to help promote Windows Vista. Her method: highlighting users' “desktop personality types …

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Paris Hilton

Ummm...seriously??

Somebody is paying her for that advice?

Damn, I'm in the wrong job..

My desktop is very neat and tidy and I don't have the bloody clue :( errrr did I say that out loud?

Paris as she doesnt have a clue either..

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Ash
Joke

What does my desktop say about me?

C:\> |

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IT Angle

But really...

if you're running Vista we know what kind of personality type you are already.

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Anonymous Coward

DreamScene

I'm running DreamScene, nice simple background with subtle movement.

What does it mean ? I guess it means I paid too much for my copy of Vista and I'm using too many watts because my graphics card is working when it need not. Bugger.

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Load of bollox

My icons are all arranged into neat rows and grouped by function but, the very fact that I'm here typing this, rather than trying to meet a very tight and important deadline, shows that I'm not in the least bit focused and have no idea how to organise or prioritise my work. I'm just obsessive compulsive and don't like things to look untidy.

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Erm.

"a desktop with numerous neat rows of icons means you’re the sort of person" who clicks auto-arrange, shurley..

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Thumb Down

You mean there's a background?

I have no idea what's on my desktop background. I never see it cos it's permanently covered with application windows. What does that say about me? That I actually use my PC rather than staring at a blank screen?...

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Linux

Bad Science

Sounds like a candidate for a Ben Goldacre investigation.

http://www.guardian.co.uk/science/series/badscience

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Alert

Oh dear

I have no icons and a plain pale cream background so it loads in VNC very fast. Does this mean that people think I'm a paranoid control freak?

I am, but I was hoping no-one would notice.

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Stop

This can't be real?

If you have a tidy desktop, you're a tidy person and if you have an unorganized desktop you're an unorganized person? And this qualifies as research?

Presumably if your employer implements a locked desktop group policy where you can't change the wallpaper or add/remove icons it means they've stolen your soul, leaving you an empty flesh shell chained to a desk.

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Alert

@ Natalie Gitpants

I noticed only because I'm the same :)

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Anonymous Coward

Does this mean that...

... if I use group policy to sort everyone's icons that I'll trigger a massive upshoot in productivity amongst the staff and thus lay claim to a massive payrise? And if they are being noisy should I make it blue so they all become shy and retiring?

Presumably I have no personality given that I have no desktop icons, just the KDE4 desktop folder widget...

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Paris Hilton

Be fair...

...after all, this "psychologist" was "called in by Microsoft to help promote Windows Vista". It's an impossible job.

Paris, because she likes being messed up on screen.

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Ray
Alert

Ow, my eyes!

"For example, if you’re desktop is splattered with icons then..."

/NOT pedant

As for the desktop - having a background eats up valuable kilobytes of memory, so I have none. I also have no app shortcuts, just what has been downloaded in Firefox. I also like to think I'm a bit hardcore by not having a (Ubuntu equivalent of the) Start menu on show.

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Alert

Which computer?

one has a wall-e background that I pieced together myself, another has the autobot logo from the transformers movie (2007) and another has a stock background. icons are generally in order of what was installed last (nice and neat to the left - out of the way of displayed wallpaper).

ooo... I like robots and possibly new technologies. oh gee... anyone that talks to me for more than 5 minutes finds that out.

just for fun, let's all change our backgrounds to that bugger plain grassy hill and make everyone think they're suddenly in pleasantville or some 1984 knock-off.

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Most obvious item missed by M$

since when did you have to have Vista to devise this??? 95, ME, NT, XP even lowly 3.1 (plus pretty much any graphical OS) allowed you to arrange your desktop neatly (if you wanted) and have a background pic.

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Paris Hilton

@Mark McC

If you work somewhere that locks your desktop down that tight then yes, you will probably end up 'an empty flesh shell chained to a desk' :-(

Paris, a fine example of 'an empty flesh shell'

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Silver badge
Coat

What if...

I don't have a PC, I have a Mac?

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Pirate

Key to what again?

A clue perhaps?

She's the same kind of person who would look at my KDE4 Linux desktop and go "Cool, is that Vista?".

If she looks away i'd rotate it to another virtual desktop looking quite different, and upset her poor little world even more.

Grow some balls woman, and step into the real world.

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Heart

Hi-res pic of Eliza Dushku here...

I like to have black spaces on either side of the wallpaper to shove all the icons on to... that way it doesn't cover up the image.

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Flame

What about other methods?

I have a completely blank desktop (what good is it when it's behind all my windows?), but everything gets dumped in my Deposit folder and organised as I see fit. So am I tidy or messy?

Uttter bollocks

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OS rituals

Unbox new machine, connect, boot up.

Set menus, Control Panel to Classic, Explorer to Details view.

Set desktop background to default blue.

Load apps, create shortcuts, auto-arrange icons.

Space icons to look busy but proportionate.

Take pills, make appt to see shrink.

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Thumb Up

EEE PC woman

Is the purpose of this article just an opportunity to show us the eee pc woman again?

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Happy

So I guess this makes me... odd?

Our home HTPC stays on pretty much 24x7 for instant usage, from music, films, internet, actual work etc. I guess I agree with this article in someways without even knowing it as I always make sure we have a good wallpaper on screen for whenever the screen or projector is turned on as it's ALWAYS always the first thing you see on screen.

- Dekstop icons off (always)

- Apple dock for Windows Vista (random app works pretty well)

- Auto changes wallpaper on reboot using any of the 1000's of personal photos

- Minimal usage of Windows SideBar (just not on the side)

- Tablet input slides out from the left only when needed (for our Wacom scribble thingy)

I miss DreamScene as it always looked KooL (better with DreamScape), but as our HTPC is on 24x7 it's not ideal due, as the power consumption will drop heavily when idle (15%-24%), but with DreamScene enabled it's higher (27%-41%).

This was taken a month ago, but gives you the basic idea: http://www.fazzfilmz.co.uk/random/asus_forum/screengrab-feb2009

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Linux

Desktop Automatons

Having a Windows Desktop is about as customisable as the paint options for new cars, beyond the Desktop Wallpaper, icon arrangement and whether to have the updated look and feel or the familiar one, all windows desktops look the same.

Automatons would be a better personality description for windows users.

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Anonymous Coward

NUFF SAID......

She has a yahoo email address and no dentist

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