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back to article El Reg suffers identity crisis

These are tough times for news media, on and offline. Small newspapers are going titsup all over the shop, hundreds of blogs are discovering there's no money in "link journalism", and many at the UK nationals spend their time copying out each other's work and trawling the web for pictures of cutesy animals. All the while, El Reg …

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Boffin

POITS Day

Procrastinate on internet, Tomorrow's Saturday

Any way this poll clearly tells you more about you readers than your site... BOFH all the way...

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Aggro loner twats

I can't believe I was the first to vote for "A bunch of aggro loner twats"

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What the Daily Mail says

is "A respected technology news website".

Now I was going to tick this box, but I'm genetically, morally and intellectually unable to agree with anything in the Wail, so had to go with one of the other entries.

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Bronze badge
Coat

Vote NOW!!!

Come on all you LESBIANS, LETS GET EL REG AS OURS!!!!!

The Pink one with built in falsies!!

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Anonymous Coward

Surely you're the dog I wag?

Surely you're the dog I wag?

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Go

wtf

i'm all for free speech and all, but i would love to know the justification of some of the comments this site has had. 'loner twats'? and for that matter... "anything to get clicks", same could be said that a transvestite is just wanting attention.

i cannot wait for what the daily mail has to say...

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Can we have checkboxes, please?

I want to click about 7 of these, and at least 3 don't fit (so all of the above isn't good either).

Given that these are not mutually exclusive (i.e. your readership could see you as an unethical, comically angry, online lesbian magazine website), I think you need to use checkboxes instead of radiobuttons to get a better and more concise survey ^H^H^H^H^H^H ^H^H^H ^H^H^H^H ^H^H^H^H^H^H^H ^H^H^H^H^H^H (sorry, forgot we're in Web 2.0 now) richer and more compelling experience.

And you forgot to add the Paris Hilton fan club website choice...

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Pirate

I did love the "Daily Fail"

Hmm I'm sorry I read this poll and laughed a few times, the Daily Fail sorry Mail, saying that about you, they are after something, oh maybe it's to show they aren't c**p after all.

Yarrr

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Huh?

"Functionally an ad-banner trolling site who will publish any rubbish if it'll get clicks, and best ignored. (Senior Wikipedian David Gerard)"

Well, I've never clicked an ad. After years of internet exposure, my retinas and brain filter out adverts on websites. And judging by the decline in pay-per-click, so has everyone else's retinas and brains.

I find it amusing that Mr Gerard makes that comment considering the amount of unsubstantiated and inaccurate one-sided gumpf on Wiki. (Okay, okay, so they have cleaned up their act of late).

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Anonymous Coward

Hahah

Is David Gerard the one person who's voted for his description?

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Anonymous Coward

Hey!

" Functionally an ad-banner trolling site who will publish any rubbish if it'll get clicks, and are best ignored. (Senior Wikipedian David Gerard) 0% (1)"

Hey, David Gerard voted!

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I agreed with the Daily Mail

I now feel dirty.

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Suggestions

Biting the long tail that feeds Web 2.0

Unashamed that the Daily Mail called them respected

Unashamed that the Grauniad calls them ever-excellent

A site full of scurrilous children's toy-abusing vapid heiress-obsessed [MS|Apple|O'Reilly's bunch of badgers|Sadville|Jimbo Wales' clique of "experts"|Edit this description]-baiting memoclastic climactic sceptical articles and not enough BOFH.

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Re: What the Daily Fail says

Totally agree, I couldn't bring myself to every agree with anything the fucktards at the fail say, so voted for the guardian entry instead ;)

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Stop

Explain Please...

Why there are no comments permitted alongside the highly dubious "if you use the pirate bay you are supporting a Neo-Nazi" article?

http://www.theregister.co.uk/2009/02/26/pirate_bay_neo_nazi/

???

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Dead Vulture

"A respected technology news website (The Daily Mail)"

With that kind of endorsement, you are not only 'None of the above', but also 'Fucked'!

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Ash

Missing option

Tech tabloid (Me.)

Seriously. You're "The Nerd's Daily Mirror."

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Dead Vulture

Is it not an online lesbian magazine?

Fuck.

I've just wasted the last 3 years of my life.

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Woo Hoo

Vote 101 on A respected technology news website, even if the quote did come from the Daily Hate Mail

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Ad-banner trolling site ...

... who will publish any rubbish if it'll get clicks, and best ignored? That's not very specific, is it, Mr Gerard?

And when do we get the poll helping us to decide exactly what Andrew Orlowski is?

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The P-Word

Populist in the best sense of the word, I'd say, despite a mostly specialist audience.

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Bronze badge

Oh dear.

Outed after all this time.

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Go

What it is...

Well now guys, You are the techno site I INVARIABLY read with pleasure, brilliant at times, annoying at other times, but always stimulating, and you defy categories, please keep doing whta you are doing!!!

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The real fragrance around Jemima Kiss?

The name seems rather close to Glenda Slag (Private I). It would seem the Grauniad is desperately trying to assure its readers how working-class and street-wise they aren't.

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Well I for one

am not a Lesbian.

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Paris Hilton

Well I was trying to be serious...

And everyone else goes for the lesbian thing (do you mean the people on the island of Lesbos, or those girls that like to touch other girls in the no-no place(s)*?).

Why isn't there a 'More interesting than most other sites' option...

PH - is she from Lesbos?

ttfn

*The 'no-no' place(s) can quickly become 'yes-yes' places if touched in a certain way. Be warned people!

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Coat

Mr Gerard...

said that like it was a Bad Thing.

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Anonymous Coward

@Explain please

Andrew Orlowski articles rarely do. I assume he owns elReg or part of it. I don't read past the first page on his articles because he doesn't let me comment on them.

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Happy

It really was a bad idea

Having this poll up and being able to select 'Lesbians' was never a good idea, it's fortunate you aren't rebranding, otherwise you'd be well on the way to being one of the most read Lesbian periodicals ever.

I for one salute our El Reg overlords for always bringing something funny and informative to the desk each day.

And as for The Daily Phail, ODFO.

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And on a second note.

How about you do actually rebrand, 'Biting the lesbian that feeds IT'

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@checkboxes

Click back, then vote again ftw

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Paris Hilton

Missing?

Surely you missed out

# the best place in the world to learn how to handle computers and their users (c.f. BofH)

# Paris Hilton's best advert

p.s. Am I a lesbian because I am sexually attracted to women?

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Anonymous Coward

Missing Option

Scandal-mongering sweatshop where wannabe technology journalists are expected to file numerous stories each day regardless of whether they know what they are talking about (but nevertheless achieving a pretty good success rate) run by people whose utter cynicism towards the powers-that-be in the technology industry is a refreshing change from most other sources and whose sense of humour - while not to everyone's taste - makes for a likeable and readable (if often not spellchecked) online magazine for nerds and Paris Hilton watchers of all ages, most of whom are savvy enough never to click on a banner-ad (which begs the question "how does The Register cover its costs?").

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Erm ...

Why are you being selective with the comments el reg? My earlier post contained no nasty words you don't print on your front page yet it didn't appear here ... you seem to be proving the point I made in my post ..?

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Anonymous Coward

All of the above

Minus the wikitard's comment.

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Paris Hilton

Right....

...So enough people have voted to make it the internet truth...Now WHERE THE BLOODY HELL ARE MY LESBIANS.

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Wow

Phorm actually accused El Reg of being unethical. "Pot, kettle, black" doesn't even approach my feelings about that.

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Alert

Blimey!

I can't believe that the Daily Mail called El Reg "A respected technology news website" I feel somehow dirty for reading the Reg now.

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If I were a girl...

...I'd definitely be a lesbian. Does that count?

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Stop

A bunch of aggro loner twats

"Ms Kiss's studies in visual performance at Dartington College of Arts in Devon provided her with the core skills of observation and expression needed for journalism..."

http://www.journalism.co.uk/8/articles/30127.php

So she's qualified (barely) to talk about the readers of El Reg. Guardian Unlimited indeed.

Jemima Kiss, I'll just give it a miss. I'm a poet and I know it. Only on Fridays after a visit to the pub though.

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Ian

RE: Explain please

"Why there are no comments permitted alongside the highly dubious "if you use the pirate bay you are supporting a Neo-Nazi" article?"

Because it's an Andrew Orlowski article and he's always wrong but doesn't like to hear it so doesn't have comments enabled on his articles. If you check most of his controversial articles you'll find the same. This is undoubtedly where the Wikipedians comment about The Register being a click-whoring troll site comes from because he does produce an awful lot of trolls and then prevent people pointing out how factually incorrect he nearly always is. I mean, this is a guy that thinks that 3 out of 5 selected Japanese scientists = nationwide consensus. His comment policy is in contrast to say Lewis Page, who is still nearly always wrong, but credit to the guy he at least gives you chance to point out why in the comments.

But anyway, your post distracted me from what I was going to point out here. The Daily Mail comment is perhaps more telling than many may think. The Register itself has been guilty of slagging off the Daily Mail but in recent years it's become so similar in style it's no suprise the Daily Mail has praised it.

I think the Daily Mail praising The Register says more about what it's become than it is a compliment, it's effectively official recognition by the Daily Mail itself that The Register has become as shit as it is.

Still, The Register has one thing going for it- it does at least break some stories, it's just a shame that when it does it doesn't break them in a manner that's useful reading. It at least gives you an overview of the breaking news though even if the substance is like a big steamy pile of horse turd though.

If only there was some care at The Register to return back towards it's roots, the distinction between it and a collection of personal blogs of clueless trolling teenagers is shrinking daily.

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Stop stealing my abuse

As one of the people who Ms Kiss called an "aggro loner twat" as well as a "twatty commenter", can I just ask El Reg to stop muscling in on my territory? This is no way to treat one of your long term lesbians. Er, readers.

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Hah

"Online lesbian magazine" is currently WAY out in front, which has me giggling insanely in the office.

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(Written by Reg staff)

@ Reg = Mail

Seriously? There's an ODFO here with your name on it. See? It says 'Ian' in cursive script just under the D.

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Lee
Joke

All this mention of lesbians....

.....and nothing posted from Sarah Bee?

(this is my social experiment to see whether the lesbian-loving pizza-eating geeks that we all are now assume that Sarah's a lezza)

((that's also not to say that Sarah's not a lezza))

(((also there's nothing wrong with being a lezza, Sarah)))

((((does anyone bar me find this juvenile shit funny?))))

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Unhappy

this isnt the title you are looking for /jedi

I couldnt possibly bring myself to agree with anything that the Daily Wail says!

How could you even offer that as an option, you bunch of unethical (and proud of it) b'stards???

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Go

this isnt the president you are looking for

Being able to go back and vote again - is that like presidential voting in Florida?

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honestly?

not impressed with the selection, I think you could have trolled harder.

I suggest "private-eye-liner virtual universe"

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(Written by Reg staff)

Re: Stop stealing my abuse

I believe she was referring to The Reg, collectively, if you look. The abuse is ours, fair and square. We'll let you have 'twatty commenter', although why you'd want it, I can't imagine.

Wow - whatever did we argue about before the internet?

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Unethical

I've gone for Unethical .... that's the mother of compliments from Phorm

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