I'm so glad I reread that one three time. The first few attempts had a spurious "f" somewhere in the middle.

Maybe Paris made the same mistake and was disappointed?

...No I have no idea who your are...Should I?

Surely it'd be a public indecency offence, even if it WAS the guy from "The A Team"

You misspelled _cock_

full of jarring colours carefully contrived to render all detail indiscernible, music that is probably rubbish (but impossible to actually hear any of due to some incredibly baroque compression), flashing shit, animated wallpaper and a million and one other things that are liable to make the viewer wish for an early death (presuming of course that their eyeballs haven't already given up)?

The goggles, they do nothing, and everyone else is going to use Paris, aren't they?

Paris is about to find a new, British, BFF on her new, British show "Paris' *British* New Best Friend."

So that's OK then. We give them Who Wants to be a Millionaire. They give us Paris. Fair trade.

Really; who cares what this amateur porn star gets up to? I've half a mind to write a greasmonkey script to purge such stories from my El Reg viewing.

As to Robin Thickie...apt name. Having done backstage work, you have no idea if that is the star or some look-a-like psycho bampot (and the minor stars are worse, jayzuz, jumped up assholes). So you checks the badge. No badge, no dice. Twat off.

i for one welcome out new face sucking overlords!

you can't just write this shit and not post a picture. big. fucking. tease.

Famously an Aussie ticket desk bod once announced on the tannoy "ladies and gentlemen, there's someone trying to push in to the front of the queue who doesn't know who he is - can anyone here assist him?"

Or words to that effect.

Fingers crossed he's got a video camera too...

I would imagine Ms. P. Hilton is fairly well acquainted with electro-mechanical toys and is simply attempting a stretch into the more warmblooded variety.

Paris because even she knows how to replace a bettery.

he got his end away with her or at least grabbed a feel. Lucky fecker!

If I was the security guard I'd be quoting Eddie Izzard and the Death Star Canteen lines.

Either

1) Lord Vader of Cheam

or

2) are you Mr Stevens ...of Catering?

I Love Paris.

Heck, I'm not even AC for this one.

Double-heck - the wife wants a Chihuahua.

Paris, will you be my girlfriend (and protect me from my wife?)? I'd rather have my first Chihuahua with you (and your money) to be honest.

If not, I'll be sticking with my Amstaff habit. S'up to you, burd :-)

I'm too pissed to follow this or even care. However, in my quest to include Paris in all my submissions, here she is.

That's all.

I misread your: the blonde budding artist

as the blonde PUDDING artist