that is all.

Or maybe the evil geniuses will crack YouTube and, in a demonstration of original comedic thought, redirect every video to a copy of "Never gonna give you up" by Rick Astley.

Oh that would make me so LOL !!!!

I would be cracking up for days !!!

Brilliant post. You hate script kiddies, don't you? Go on, admit it. I can tell anyway.

Ted sounds like he could do with a good poo.

el Reg, when will you stop printing this unmitigated drivel!!

i've liked this guys articles a few times but then i got to the bit where he starts making fun out of kids with downs syndrome, at that point i kinda presumed he was a 13 anime fan trying to shock, i then got to the second downs joke and realized he wasn't a 13 year old anime fan, he's just a cock

i was going to pose a question to the admin/editors of el reg about wether they think it's ok to take the piss out of kids with downs but then i realized that i'd already read the article so I guess the register does support ridiculing disabled children

i for one do not welcome our insensitive editor overlords and their shock cock writers

It's "Down's syndrome" btw. Next time you do any research, look further than Wikipedia. Taking the piss out of Down's syndrome kids isn't funny, ever. My brother, who has Down's syndrome, generally smacked other kids on the nose when they took the piss out of him, which made their nose bleed and then they started crying. Now, THAT was funny.

What's with the Down Syndrome hatred? Or does it take someone with an IQ of less than 70 for you to be able to outwit them?

As a pundit, though, I can tell you that making fun of Twitter's feeble attempt at engineering is like making fun of a kid with Down syndrome: It's only funny the first couple of times.

Since when was making fun of down syndome kids funny even once ?

People with Downs Syndrome are not, I'm afraid, a valid source of vindictive amusement for penile twerps like this author (who seems to embody all that is worst about the very group he is criticising).

This article is offensive and should be removed immediately.

A "Fail and You" that's actually got decent sarcasm instead of potty-mouthed swearwords. Good job!

P.S. Following the advice given by a Reg hack on the comments thread of one of the first FaYs, I have been habitually ignoring FaYs and only read this one by accident, so perchance some others have been good too...

The man from Anonymous, he say, "Down's Syndrome jokes are funny." Keep up the good work!

Clearly taking her own advice (from comments some time ago) not to read FaY articles so as to avoid offence, El Reg's erstwhile sub-editor Sarah Bee seems to have missed out on correcting Ted's use of Down Syndrome to Down's Syndrome.

Rubbish.

And the comments by the Politically Correct 'tards made it even funnier.

Ted, you should know that jokes may only mention white middle-aged males of christian culture and average fitness and health. Unless you are from another social group. Fat black chicks with a cancer might, in addition, do jokes about fat or black or female people (or any combination. Possibly even about cancer) for example. Ted, live and learn -or pretend you have Down syndrome. All will be OK then.

For all the commenters taking issue with the Down's Syndrome gags, go back and re-read them. We all know that making fun out of Down's Syndrome kids is bang out of order, of course it didn't stop most people doing it when they were 8 did it? The point is, by likening hacking Twitter to making fun of Down's Syndrome, you just see how lame and purile the Twitter hackers are.

Go back and read it, then read a definition of sarcasm, then read Ted's article again.

Great article Ted!

Given the general tone of comments, perhaps we should rename it 'Fail and Me'.

← heart for Sarah, who always makes my day.

Oi! What's Frank Zappa got to do with Hacking?

I'll thank you never EVER to take Frank's name in vain. Or in Vein . . . or in vane . . . wtf ever.

Penguin, because Frank had an amusing song about one. I doubt you'll find it in the U.K. though, as that kind of activity is now classified as extreme porn.

Some have it, some don't.. In its original form, this tirade was pure genius.

Mine's the one stolen from the Down Syndrome kid.

Truly I am.

While publishing an article on the general pussification you then withdraw a couple of gags about mong kids. The Reg has turned pussy!

" These arsehats were given the keys to the kingdom*, ..... *Ok. A very small kingdom populated entirely by sad gits with no life, but the analogy's sound."

What, you mean they hacked that other mind wrenchingly pointless institution..... Second (Lack of) Life?

Are we seriously living in a world where an unfunny, sad, pointless little hack shutdown SFO and had the entirety of Silicon Valley weeping into their Collective Paradigms?

Fuck, we're doomed, we are so fucking doomed.

PS I'm with Sarah on the "insufficent middle fingers" thing

PPS Still, the article made me smile for the first time today.

No they weren't. They were actually quite funny *and* not the least offensive. I would say that they were in *very* good taste actually, which is difficult to do in such situations. The article is *massively* less amusing without them. The fucktards who felt offended should remember that there is quite a difference between _mentionning_ a disability -even in a tongue-in-cheek context- and being offensive. PC terrorists:1 ; El Reg: 0.

A great Frenchman once said "English humor is bitterly highlighting the world's hopeless absurdity. French humor is making fun of my mother-in-law" *, but when I read some comments here -and the apology-, I feel like English humor is actually about not being too bitter or saying anything about our absurd world. I could be about making fun of my mother-in-law. Except that I can't even mention her if I am male because it would be sexist. Also I can't mention her in a joke if she is fat or black or jew or muslim or disabled or old or dead or red-haired or blond or pregnant or sick or foreign or whatever I am not. English humor is about not being very humorous nowadays it would seem. Even self-irony is disregarded because the PC brigade fucktards are so filled of self-importance that they can't imagine that someone might not be. You can bet the Monty Python are silently weeping in their, hem, graves. I say, we -> orbit ; nuke -> site.

*forgive the home-made translation

Why is it that it's acceptable to take the piss out of an average male/female etc. but as soon as you start taking the piss out of the disabled it makes too many people see red? Those people are usually fucking hypocrits, they're the kind of people who try to see disabled people as equals and want everyone else to see them as equals - well doesn't having the piss taken out of disabled people put them on an equal footing with able bodied people?

As someone with Aspergers Syndrome I'd just like to say: where are all the Autism jokes? Bring em on!

Meh, screw you guys, I'm off to re-watch episodes of The Big Bang theory because I understand /all/ the jokes.

"While publishing an article on the general pussification you then withdraw a couple of gags about mong kids. The Reg has turned pussy!"

Amen to that. Thankfully, the commentards quoted the original text and I still managed to appreciate the jokes.

Good work, Ted.

Well, unfortunately the PC nobheads get their first, get 'offended' by something that really isn't anything to do with them, and spoil it for everyone else, but personally I just think they are sad attention seekers best ignored.

They should look at their own sad lives before criticising other people, because of numpties like this you cannot say anything in a humorous way these days without it 'offending' someone. Fucks sake.

Ouch!

In hope of more middle finger action - it really should be 'offence' (unless we have our US English spell checker swithed on, of course).

Keep smiling!

I have a friend who is very, very camp and gay. He has heard all the gay jokes. Said in good humour, by people who are accepted as mates, they are funny to him too.

So we are out with him (bear in mind our circle friends including him go back to when we were 5 years old, and we are now in our 30's) and there is some new girlie along with the group.

Someone makes a joke, the same ones we have done for years (don't worry he gives as good as he gets, remarks like "you wish dearie" are sometimes enough), and this girl suddenly jumps on the PC moral high ground and starts having a go.

Suffice to say, our mate first points out that he is not a pussy, is insulted that she thought he could not stand up for himself, that she has no business having a go at people who have been friends for 25 years, and really should stop being such an annoying whiny bitch. Yes - it was a very pissed off reaction - he was very, very offended by her assumption that he was somehow the underdog, and that he needed defending.

Here is a summary of your literary efforts so far - Web 2.0 is pointless- I'm jealous of Google - Tech bloggers don't know jack-shit - Valley people are liberals - Programmers working on new programs/languages aren't rocket scientists. And thanks for telling us .. we didn't know all this until you put your mighty pen to work and it was funny the way you described them the first time around. So, you got anything else to say?

@AC

" I have a friend who is very, very camp and gay. He has heard all the gay jokes. Said in good humour, by people who are accepted as mates, they are funny to him too.

>snip snip<

Someone makes a joke, the same ones we have done for years (don't worry he gives as good as he gets, remarks like "you wish dearie" are sometimes enough), and this girl suddenly jumps on the PC moral high ground and starts having a go.

>snippety snip<

he was very, very offended by her assumption that he was somehow the underdog, and that he needed defending. "

No-one has ever suggested that gay people should be classed as "vulnerable adults". Down's Syndrome sufferers are vulnerable as kids and adults -- they are vulnerable all their lives.

For this, we look after them; as a society, as families, as individuals; because they can't look after themselves. Your pal *could* look after himself -- the offense was suggesting he couldn't, but this is in no way an offense when it comes to Down's sufferers.

Gay jokes and jokes about Down's Syndrome are completely incomparable.

As funny as parts of Ted's articles can be, you have very succinctly summarized all of them. So do what the rest of us do and take it all with a huge grain of salt in an effort to find the chuckles along the way. Cos expecting a new or different effort from any FaY article is an exercise in futility.