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Roachzilla menaces Florida

drunk.smile

What? No Lawyer gags? 

El Reg, you disappoint me.

Anonymous Coward

easy problem to solve 

1) release more reptiles to eat cockroaches

2) release mongooses (mongeese? mongupi? mongoloids?) to eat reptiles

3) release gorillas to eat aforementioned mammals

4) gorillas die out in winter

or something along those lines anyway

Aram

Madagascar hissing cockroach 

Alien

Jumping Jesus on a moped - it's 5 (count 'em, 5) inches long and it HISSES? Would you not have to be a komodo dragon to not be afraid of that?

Lloyd

Hmmmmm....... 

Black Helicopters

Talking of big cockroaches in Florida, has anyone heard anything from Jeb Bush recently?

This post has been deleted by a moderator

Hollerith

please God no 

I was face to face with six-inch, winged roaches in Macao, crawling out of the headboard of my bed, and I lose ten years of my life through the sheer horror. These creatures purposely imported to the content of my birth seems a madness to appalling to be contemplated.

} shudder {

Paul

RE:easy problem to solve 

You plan misses two steps:

5)........?

6) PROFIT!!!!!!!

fran

I for one 

Alien

Welcome our roach overlords

JP Strauss

"Hissing" Cockroaches? 

Jobs Horns

So they'll be feminists then?

BillyBoy

What a bunch of girls. 

Coat

Who could care less!

- Coat with a rolled up news paper in the pocket.

Andrew Tyler

Roach... 

When I was younger I worked at a hardware store in California. Opened up a box of bolts one day, shipped from god knows where, and there was a roach in there that was easily four inches long--one of the most hideous things I've ever seen. Naturally, I took it outside and flung it in the bushes.

Florida is dependent on tourism. They already have those palmetto bugs and big spiders, but if they have five-inch-long hissing cockroaches, I will never set foot in the state again. I doubt my cowardice is uncommon. They had better do something. If nothing else, for the sake of Mickey Mouse.

Anonymous Coward

Used to have a friend 

Go

who moved to Florida, called me in the dead of winter, and asked me how things were up there in the land of ice and snow. I replied: "Fine -- how are things down there in the land of the six inch cockroach?"

He hung up on me. Can't imagine why.

Dr. Mouse

Upto five inches long? 

Joke

That's nothing... I got something in my pants that...

OK, I wont bother :P

Anonymous Coward

tourism destinations 

Joke

You think bugs are bad for tourism -- you should live in Nebraska -- I can only imagine the look on the kids' faces when they hear "We're going to Nebraska -- the happiest place on Earth -- for *us*!" Heh. That ought to keep the little bastages quiet in the back seat.

RW

I can't resist 

Joke

Maybe that should become the new code name for Wakkyjakky: "the hissing cockroach."

kain preacher

@Lloyd 

Jeb is preparing to run for prez

Anonymous Coward

Roachzillas 

Black Helicopters

Just those names are enough to inspire fear in an insectophobe: the _hissing_ cockroach? the _lobster_ cockroach? And if they interbreed, do we get the orange-spotted hissing lobster cockroach? I just can't wait until my wife finds one of those in our laundry room...

Anonymous Coward

I wonder 

Paris Hilton

if they taste like chicken?

I wonder if Paris does, too?

Anonymous Coward

Hissing cockroach 

Go

If I'm not mistaken, the Madagascar Hissing Cockroach is much like the Australian Giant Burrowing Cockroach, in size and in that it's preferred habitat is munching dead vegetation on the rainforest floor (so your house is an inviting place for them).

Unlike your average cockroach, these species take a lot longer to mature, so plagues are unlikely and they should be fairly easy to eradicate if they do become a problem.

Personally while I hate the flying, house invading varieties as much as the next person, I find these types of cockroaches quite interesting and not at all scary.

Anonymous Coward

Jeb is preparing... 

Paris Hilton

Jeb Bush may be preparing to run for President, but he's going to have to wait until the collective memory of the voters forgets how bad the brother was... should take maybe four years...

Paris because even she would be better than another Bush

James O'Shea

minor stuff 

Coat

Compared to the vicious and/or hideous creatures already stalking the Florida landscape (Quebecois snowbirds driving huge hunks of Detroit iron, 12 to 18 foot, 'gator-eating, Burmese pythons, six-foot iguanas, nuclear-power-plant loving crocodiles, Sarah Palin already running for Prez in 2012) a roach ain't nothing. Besides, something that size will be just one more thing on the list of items that Florida crackers (Homo idioticus shotguni) will hunt, shoot, and eat.

If you think that I'm joking about the pythons, iguanas, and crocs (not, repeat, not 'gators...), Google is your friend.

I only wish that I was joking about the Quebecois and Palin. With luck one of 'em will ram the other and eliminate both threats. Or maybe a Florida cracker will take Palin huntin' and and a nuke-pumped croczilla will get 'em both. You gotta have hope...

Mine's the one with the industrial-sized can of Baygon in the pocket.

jim

Jim 

Coat

I welcome them with open arms, with my lifestyle I welcome any sort of roach material.

Mines the one with the half used pack of Zig Zags in the pocket.