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back to article Stick health warnings on gays, says Stock Exchange chaplain

The chaplain to the London Stock Exchange may be forced to walk the plank after demanding that gay chaps be tattooed with cig-packet-style health warnings highlighting the evils of boy-on-boy. The Rev Peter Mullen, 66, declared on his blog: "It is time that religious believers began to recommend ... discouragements of homosexual …

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Paris Hilton

Maybe....

We could tatoo priest with the warning relgion can seriously alter your world view or some such. It does make me laugh the some priest go on. Get with the times. Its no wonder that church attendances are declining when priest come out with views like this.

Paris becuase I want to know what she has tatooed on her arse :)

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Heart

hmm

how about we tattoo that fucker with the message 'prolonged exposure may result in homicidal tendencies'

what a bigotted twat. he should be fired - does not deserve to hold that post.

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Joke

Seems like he's missed the point of satire...

If what he's against is the "militant preaching of homosexuality", then why not try and satirise that instead of just being generally insulting? Of course, what I have against him is his militant preaching of Christianity, but that's another matter...... ;-)

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(Written by Reg staff)

Re: Maybe....

Well, it was clearly satire. It was just crap satire. And it's a bit rich of him to invoke the 'grand tradition' when he doesn't know what he's doing, and isn't exactly the gays' best friend to start with.

In summary, then - peh. Peh on the silly man.

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Not that old excuse!

Ah the old "it was only a joke" excuse again. How many people have tried that one and failed I wonder. I know a certain Mr Ratner failed rather famously.

I also wonder how he would respond to the argument that homosexuality is something you are born with, and as such it is therefore an act of God?

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DMG
Thumb Up

Yeuch

Can we get "I'm a backwards prick, just so you're aware" tattooed on the clergy please?

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Joke

Right

You know it would seem the guy is right, far too many people are too eager to be offended these days and if you don't put Joke, sarcasm or satire at the start of your post, article or blog entry then it's like 'light the blue touch paper and run for cover'

Oh and El Reg isn't immune to this, why do you think they have this Joke Alert icon?

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Gold badge

"The chaplain to the London Stock Exchange"

The mind boggles at such a job description, but hasn't he got more important business to attend to right now?

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Why is he being condemned?

Surely he is just preaching true, strict, christianity -- it's not his fault it's bollocks.

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(untitled)

"He...doesn't cloud his views in political correctness." Or common sense by the sounds of it.

I didn't know the Stock Exchange had a chaplain. Explains quite a lot of the recent goings on.

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Coat

"Fag-packet...." Hahaha

Type your comment here — plain text only, no HTML

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Coat

It's not the pro-minority-pride marches that are obscene

it's the reaction you get for a negative one. "Straight and Proud" would get complained about, as would "Aetheistic and loving it".

It was clearly an attempt at satire, or alternatively he's stuck in the closet and just wanted an excuse to see a lot of naked gay guy's asses with a [tattooing needle] prick hovering over them, depositing fluid.

And "Fellatio Kills"? Doesn't that sort of apply to non-gays as well? Or have me and the missus suc[k]cessfully nabbed a fetish of them?

And for the obligatory awful punchline to the comment- the gay guys should learn to take it on the chin and the chaplain should stop trying to be a pain in the arse...

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Anonymous Coward

I'm sure

I'm sure soon he'll be in a NuGov think tank on censoring the internet soon enough.

Sounds just like the kind of guy both Brown and Cameron want to warm upto.

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Coat

Wesboro Baptist Church

Look out, Fred Phelps - a challenger appears...

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Pirate

What is it....

..that the supposedly religion does? Show tolerance for other's beliefs, respect for other people and spreading love? Of course providing you're not a senile old bigot with some kind of right wing tendencies, then that might just work. Couldn't agree more with AC1, tattoo the sad old git with "Religious abuse seriously screws you up! See attached for details!".

It's at times like this that I turn to the gospels according to Lord Hicks of William, a truly enlightened saviour taken before his time.

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Pirate

erm,...

I do hate to be picky, but I think you'll find tattooing 'FELLATIO KILLS' on the chin is a bit pointless as that's not where the person carrying out the act is looking, and it's obscured by something else for the person it's being carried out on.

And if he's getting preachy with the stockbrokers, they should probably start painting 'COCAINE KILLS' on the cisterns of the toilets.

Pirates, cos we've all seen what seafaring men get upto, thanks to Portsmouth museums.

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Paris Hilton

What about the fringes

My worry about this article is, who is classified as GAY?

I am a transexual woman, (hence the anonymity)

Some in the church would class me as gay as I like men, The fact that i am female with a genetic abnormality meaning i appear male should not get in the way. I am straight and am interested in Men. but some in the church and in the general public would class me as gay.

Where is the tolerance from the church that Jesus preached?

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What I have got against them is the militant preaching of homosexuality

Although, presumably, he's not opposed to the militant preaching of Christianity.

Hypocrisy at its finest.

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Flame

I agree...

BUT.

Yes, this is inflammatory if taken the wrong way and I think it's a load of crap.

However, I think political correctness has gone too far in this country if someone is derided for exercising their right to free speech. If he had posted anonymously this would never have made the news.

Pathetic. You're giving this guy the exposure he wants.

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Nicola Beckley

"He's a great leader and doesn't cloud his views in political correctness."

Translation: We're both bigotted tits.

Sigh. Obligatory Marcus Brigstock link - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UY-ZrwFwLQg

Paul

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Happy

More humane solution.

Rather than tattoos perhaps we could mark dangerous delusionists

who receive instructions from an invisable bearded man in the sky

with some sort of humane badge -- say a white band around the neck

-- oh already happens.

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Anonymous Coward

The lady doth protest too much, methinks

What is it with Christians and gays? Seems all a bit like they are suppressing something, if you ask me...

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re:Not that old excuse!

Yes, clearly he was deadly serious at the time and had already inked up his needles in preparation.

As for being born gay i'm not sure any serious scientific work has ever claimed more than that there are biological factors that influence sexual orientation, not that there aren't environmental factors as well. In any case worrying about the causes of sexuality misses the point- even if it could be shown some people have a genetic predisposition to be obese, no one would sensibly argue that it's therefore a healthy lifestyle choice. The rightness or wrongness or acceptability of an activity should surely be based on the the effects of the bahaviour, not why the person desires to do it in the first place.

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Alert

>when he doesn't know what he's doing

Are you suggesting that the Bish should try some fudge-packing himself before he condemns it?

Hmm interesting legal and moral idea, I wonder where else that could be used.

Also I wonder what he would have tattooed on his behind? 'trial period only', 'breaking in - please take care' or maybe 'next .. Hymn 69'?

Not that I am in favour of religion or homosexuality, but at least I keep my thoughts to myself.

oh bugger ....

ttfn

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Sounds like someones a closet queen...

If the internets have taught me one thing it's that those who shout the loudest about how abhorrent homosexuality is are, on balance, most likely to be the ones snorting meth off of rent boys bums or tap dancing in assorted public toilets.

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Anonymous Coward

@AC

Would that 'genetic abnormality' perchance be a Y chromosome?

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"FELLATIO KILLS"

Erm, then you're almost certainly doing it wrong, I think. Anyhow, if it was that dangerous, there would be HSE videos about it, with the participants donning the appropriate protective gear. Make a change from Z list celebs lifting boxes.

What a dick. I can't vouch for his blog, because it's gone, which is a shame, and an affront to freedom of speech to boot, but I have read his Times article, and if it _is_ satire, it's the kind of satire that actually does need a label on it, because it doesn't come off like satire in the way that I understand it.

And why should it, since these are indeed the teachings of that vile tract of ignorance and filth The Bible, although curiously, I don't recall most of this repressive shit being in the teachings of your actual messiah, upon which the whole disgusting cult is supposedly based, go figure.

So good on him, I say, for reminding us what vile, ignorant, intolerant and backward dogma is taught by the church he represents, and why we continue to choose to live in a secular state.

Perhaps he'd consider tattooing "SATIRE" prominently on his face, just so we all know for sure where he stands.

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IT Angle

wow

"I certainly have nothing against homosexuals. Many of my dear friends have been and are of that persuasion. What I have got against them is the militant preaching of homosexuality."

Whether he meant it as a joke, or was being serious, he should be sacked for the comment. PC is extreme these days true, but the point is, it would be like the leader of Germany joking in a blog about how he thinks Jew's are ruining the country and should be forced to wear a mark of some description to let people know who they are. It would be stupid, ignorant, and extremely wrong.

PS: gay's don't go knocking on peoples houses in the morning trying to spread their good news, so I'm not quite sure what their militant preaching is mean't to be - it's not like they can help being gay, they are born that way, it's not like religion. Ignorant twat-dangler worshipper.

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Flame

Prove it

I've always wondered which part of the bible actually says being Gay is evil. I haven't really read the bible in detail but I don't ever remember seeing anything portraying Gays as evil.

Was this just a case of someone in the Vatican wants it to be, or is it buried in the disclaimer at the back.

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Flame

Traditional Anglican?

Eh? Why oh why do these right wing loons claim to be traditionalists? Stupid sods can't get their heads round a broad church understanding (traditional since Liz I) and are trying to turn the church into what they wish was the traditional stoning of anyone they don't like.

Pass the communion wine soemone, I need a drink to take my mind off of this shite.

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Friends of that persuasion

I think he really ought to have said that he *used* to have dear friends of that persuasion.

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Stop

I know...

while we at it, as Jews are clearly anti-christian, so why not make them wear a Star Of David and have a number tattoo'd on them for easy identification.

Can't belive no one has thought of that before....

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Tattoo the priests!!

I'm fine with his suggestion as long as in return, priests are tattooed with warnings such as "Clergymen may touch-up your children" or "Prolonged exposure may cause damage to choirboys".

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Unhappy

Not all crap!

He's bang on about the abortions though :-(

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Christian Virtues

Great work by the rev, many of whom's best friends are homosexual. It's good to be reminded every now and then that the pious totalitarianism suffered for centuries under the church really wasn't much different from the fascist orthodoxy offered by the Nazi party. Perhaps he should have used pink triangles and stars of David to make his point more forcibly. Hallelujah to a Church built on hatred, bigotry and persecution.

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Coat

Stock Exchange Chaplain, eh?

Shame he isn't a catlick; the trading floor confessional jokes write themselves.

"Say 9 Hail Mary's and buy 1000 Pratts at 5 and a quarter, my son."

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(Written by Reg staff)

Re: wow

>gay's don't go knocking on peoples houses in the morning trying to spread their good news

Heh. I'd give them a few moments on the doorstep.

"Hi, we're here to tell you the good news about gayness - have you ever thought about your sexuality? We have some naughty little booklets here we think you'd find inspirationa... oh but honey, that is one fierce bathrobe, wherever did you get it?"

Anyway, it's a frickin' good point.

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An interesting perspective...

After reading this, I spoke to a friend of mine who's gay, to get his opinion. He found it hilarious. His comments (after he finished chuckling) was (paraphrased, he goes on a bit):

"This is why there are more practicing homosexuals in the UK than practicing Christians."

<SATIRE ALERT>

At this point I sent him to the local tattooist for his arse-warning (that's an "N", people!!!) appointment, after giving him a good beating for being an affront to God.

</SATIRE ALERT>

As a few people have said, religion needs a health warning. Apart from the CoFSM, of course, which is true.

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Anonymous Coward

It may just be me...

...but I always get the impression that any priest-type embarking on this kind of homophobic rant is trapped so deep inside the closet they're a choir-boy away from finding Narnia.

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Joke

Dear Pot,

Found your comments hilarious. Perhaps you should go away and say three male hairies.

Love, Kettle.

To quote the T shirt, "Abstinence makes the church grow fondlers".

(which bothers you more, gay-on-gay adults or kiddie-fiddling clergy arseholes?)

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Joe
Alert

"FELLATIO KILLS"

The giver or the receiver?

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Alien

Militant Homosexuality

So, nothing about rampant heterosexuality spreading nasty diseases around?

Nothing about promoting rampant sexuality with booze and car adverts?

Nothing about promoting males rather than females in the City, nor the blatant sexism that is pretty much company policy with some of the financial houses?

Fr Dougal MacQuire was right "It's all bollocks, isn't it"

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Silver badge

he's entitled to his opinion

And as people are being locked up these days for voicing opinion...

Whether homosexuality is a choice or hereditary, so what. It is a persons right to express their sexuality in anyway they wish. Of course if this expression involves the buggering of young boys, whilst most of us would find this repugnant and despicable, it appears more than acceptable within the church. Yet buggering a consenting adult isn't. Very peculiar.

This man is seriously deluded to the point of requiring psychiatric help. I should have sympathy for his plight but somehow I don't.

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"He's a great leader and doesn't cloud his views in political correctness."

Ah, an old-fashioned bigot!

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@Anonymous Coward 'Prove It'

The Bible bashers usually point to the sheer eviltude of being a friend of Dorothy being in that laugh-a-minute bit of scripture Leviticus 18:22 'You shall not lie with a male as with a woman; such thing is an abomination.'

Being the only book anyone should ever need, the Book then goes on to provide a handy pull-out-and-keep list of punishments worthy of David Blunkett; namely death.

Rational people point out the same punishment is ordered for sinners who eat prawn crackers.

Leviticus got the contempt it deserves here:

http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=rHaVUjjH3EI

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I believe...

...the bible specifically says somewhere that "Man should not lie with Man". Mind you, the bible says a lot of things, and the church is happy to pick and choose the literal parts at will.

Agreed that it's clear this chap was simply trying to be funny, but it's still not cricket. I hate the way the church is simply allowed to say "ah, but we can say what we want, it's in this book we have, see?" as if that's a get out of jail card for being an offensive bigot.

And for the Daily Mail readers, please stop banging on about political correctness being "out of control". Firstly, it's not. Really. It's just that people now realise that actually, it's not on to just be able to discriminate against or bully people because of their choice of sexual orientation. Secondly because this hasn't got anything to do with "political correctness". It's got more to do with the fact that a religion whose major tenets are tolerance and forgiveness shouldn't be doing anything to suggest that gays will go to hell or should carry health warnings.

The Anglican Church : Successfully Being Regressive Since 1534.

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Coat

Self defeating

The guy is insensitive but his one point about militant (whether gay or christian) preaching I agree with.

The gay community spend too much time in my view self harming themselves by turning themselves into victims and marching around demanding the right to do whatever in public. I am all for equal rights and there should never be discrimination against people because they are gay. However human nature abounds and if I were to organise a straight and proud march and take a large crowd into Manchester's gay village waving placards that they found offensive, I am sure trouble would ensue eventually. But this is what they do and then act all surprised and victimised when people like the reverend thoughtless-and-unfunny over there.

Now you can't and shouldn't have to live your life under some kind of curtain to prevent others being offended by it but if you have half a brain you don't go out of your way to provoke trouble either.

As repugnant as the national front are, it would not be in the best interests of immigrants to march into one of their meetings.

At the end of the day, if issues of one person or another's sexuality are not rammed down people's throats (sorry!), most people don't care what other people do. It's only when you make a point of demanding something at someone else's expense that trouble starts.

The rev's bigoted and childish views (not shared by many) will soon be forgotten unless someone drags them into prime time news for an air his narrow minded views to a wider minority.

Mine's the one with "straight and proud but happy for you be however you want to be" on the back.

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@ Mike

Hmm I see what you mean, hadn't spotted that before. Although that passage is a little vague. Surely that only refers to one specific part of homosexuality, the sweaty bit.

Oh well, that's religion for ya ;)

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Awww

His blog's down. Google remembers, though.

Shame that - I was looking forward to some provocative comment action.

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hmmmm

"The chaplain to the London Stock Exchange" - wtf?

"SODOMY CAN SERIOUSLY DAMAGE YOUR HEALTH and their chins with FELLATIO KILLS" - ffs! dont tell the mrs "FELLATIO KILLS"! i would also like to see the obituarys - 'death by gobble'.. or the headstone 'went with a smile on his face' :)

also isnt there some implied section of that bible comic thing where jesus is felated by mary? i know its probably not taught in sunday brainwashing school but i seem to think this came out over the mary magdelane stuff?

i do find it funny how many religious priests are anti-gay then we find out they are all fiddling with little boys... ahhh hipocracy in the church? who would have though it! :(

("far worse than the threat from international terrorism"); abortion ("200,000 embryos every year are ripped, untimely, from the womb..."); and, naturally, homosexuality ("what was once a mortal sin is now only a lifestyle choice"). - arent being gay & abortions a great way to keep population numbers down? you know, the big one, the fact we are reproducing exponentially? due to all the frikkin catholics and their 'everyone have 20 kids to outbreed any other faith' nonsense.

i wonder if im my lifetime if this evil shit that is religion will ever be gone? surely we are intelligent enough to not need a belief system any more?

"He's bang on about the abortions though :-(" - wtf? yes, lets have even more chav children cluttering up the welfare system...

the yanks are quiet today? i'm waiting to see if any of the bible belt come in to help the old bigot?

@" 'You shall not lie with a male as with a woman; such thing is an abomination." - yup - ive never seen a man with a furry front bum! that would be an abomination eh? :)

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