back to article Ofcom to create 116 bureaucracies

UK regulator Ofcom is pondering how to best allocate the new vexation - as opposed to emergency - numbers mandated by the EU, to be standardised across Europe as freephone numbers starting 116. The UN has already proposed that 116111 be adopted around the world as a number for children in distress to call. To this the EU has …

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Bronze badge

I can't be the first

To think the headline meant one hundred and sixteen new departments. Can I be head of department 101 ?

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Dead Vulture

Actually not that simple

So your great idea is to send calls to Charity phone lines?

And if the money runs out? Or another one comes along? Who picks up the bill? What about if the Child Line number is unobtainable or has massive waiting times? SLA's?

Actually it's nice to see someone thinking about the subject before just blindly rolling out another service...

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Flame

Don't mock Ofcom

The work which Ofcon does is very very important indeed.

It must be otherwise they wouldn't be offering £200K/year for a part time (three days a week) job as Chair of Ofcon.

Would they?

http://appointments.egonzehnder.com/?page=Details&id=14 (closes 8 Oct)

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Pirate

Directory Inquiries, part 2

The problem with ChildLine is the lack of competition. We need to open the "kiddies in distress" market so vunerable children can make an informed choice...

Or OFCOM could grow a pair and demand that the mobile networks honour the 0800/0845/0870 charging structure, instead of gouging each other's customers with "termination" charges!

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only 3 advisory commitees?

No, there are only three 116xxx proposals mooted thus far. There are 1000 potential 116xxx phone numbers; one thousand advisory commitees are necessary.

I hereby apply for membership of the 116762 advisory ctte; this will consider the best routing for calls from people who are vexed about having to read a Princess Diana story every day because they lack the imagination to buy other than the Daily Express.

Room for 996 more comments!

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AJ
Stop

I Dont Understand Why...

... They have to make things so god damn difficult!

Doing exactly what the reg suggested in routing calls is the best solution, and ensuring that these numbers are in fact FREE on all networks regardless of it being a fixed line or mobile is a must - afterall its not like OFCOM will allow companies to set up these numbers willy nilly...

Get a bloody grip OFCOM, and sort yourselves out!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Anonymous Coward

Nah 116-* should go to the police

Nah, 116-* should all go to the same police call centre, just routed to operators trained in that area.

Routing them to middleman, even popular charities, just adds a layer of bureaucracy. Great marketing for the charity, not good for the user.

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Gold badge
Joke

Here's another one.

What's the 116 number to call when you see a bunch of tossers pissing taxpayer's money on the wall? I need to make a call after reading that little lot.

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Coat

how many 116ers are enough?

I am convinced that any topic generating more that 30 comments in El Reg is worthy of its own support line.

And please reserve 116999 for people worried about running out of numbers who want to know what to do next.

That coat has a 10 digit number on the back...

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Stop

But Why?

Why does this need standardising over the whole of Europe? If you were on holiday in France and you urgently needed some emotional support, you're not going to ring a French-speaking number, are you? You'd want to ring someone in the UK. So who cares if they have a different number to us?

It's almost as if they're trying to keep themselves busy so they don't get seen as surplus to requirements....

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Anonymous Coward

101 or SNEN to its friends

Not so long ago the Home Office had one of its better ideas, let's have a single non-emergency number to call for anything. You know Cats stuck up trees, burst water mains, vandalism, but then after some reasonably successful trials they decided not to proceed on grounds of cost.

All very well having 116... instead but who's going to pay for it. The Police are fed up enough with getting 999 calls for the paper boy not turning up, they'll love dealing with people in distress.

BTW: If the Police do get tasked with doing it, most of the benefit will magically go elsewhere, for operational reasons, Chiefs are very good at getting funding for one thing and spending it elsewhere.

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Coat

Government could make money

They could sell the other numbers to the higest bidder:-

116 200 Emergency Pizza Line

116 300 Emergency Taxi Line

etc. Well they've sold everything else!!!!!!

Mine the one with coins for the air meter in the pocket.

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Major fiddling?

How does making 116 calls 'truly' free involve any major work from the mobile phone companies? Some numbers such as Childling on 0800 1111 are free already (at least T-Mobile committed to keeping them free when they started charging for 0800 calls - just before I left them)

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In other news...

...government announced plans to extend the 112 emergency number service following EU recommendations, to speed up access to the most appropriate emergency service department. These new emergency numbers will be created, with more to be added in future:

112101 - Police - mugging

112102 - Police - gang-related

112103 - Police - alcohol-related

112104 - Police - drugs-related

112105 - Police - sex-offence

112106 - Police - terrorism

112107 - Police - racism

112108 - Police - fraud

112109 - Police - traffic

112110 - Police - celebrity

112111 - Police - obsessive compulsive criminal behaviour

112112 - Police - repeat offender

112113 - Police - turn yourself in

112114 - Police - report a crime (in progress)

112115 - Police - report a crime (suspicious looking geezer standing on the corner)

112116 - Police - report a crime (came home and found it like this)

112118 - Emergency service directory enquiries - to find the emergency number you really need.

112222 - Ambulance

112666 - Fire Department, naturally

112999 - For UK residents who still aren't aware that the EU wants 112 to be the standardised emergency number instead of 999

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Anonymous Coward

Opportunity knocks!!

Sounds like another opportunity for the private sector to roger us senseless with a few more of their 'innovative' schemes to turn taxpayer funds into private profit. That should please Ofcom.

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actuley

"They could sell the other numbers to the higest bidder:-

116 200 Emergency Pizza Line

116 300 Emergency Taxi Line

etc. Well they've sold everything else!!!!!!

Mine the one with coins for the air meter in the pocket."

that is not a bad idar it brings in more mony to make the rest of the system work and anyboady who dose not want ot use it can ignore it

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Happy

@TeeCee and @Dale

TeeCee: just what I was thinking, but you seem to have thunk it first and said it better than I was going to.

Dale, regarding the "116118" entry: what would be the correct 116xxx number for "You rotter! That was a nice cup of tea and now my keyboard's all soaked..."

Keep up the good work chaps.

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a suggestion

116419 - to report a phishing or phorm event.

It could also be linked to 116419@totalfuckingwasteofpublicresources.com

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