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back to article Hello, this is Oracle - we're not in right now

The technical forums for Oracle's entire software and services catalogue - a support and collaboration resource for thousands worldwide - have been down for two-days. Visitors to the database giant's forums, described by Oracle as containing 2.5 million messages about "every conceivable nuance of using Oracle products or …

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Anonymous Coward

Here's an idea

Why not ask Larry to spring for fixing it? He's top heavy with cash right now...

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Coat

who else read nuance...

as Nuisance

mines the one with mysql on the back

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Thumb Up

Ha ha!

Probably can't afford to pay overtime to the DBAs/developers, what with Larry's pay rise and all.

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Coat

@ AC: same here...

...I also read "nuisances" instead of "nuances", which is probably not so wrong in this context.

Another problem could be the Oracle backend to the forum...it might have failed and now they cannot look up the error in their Knowledge Base.

Mine is the one with...um, wait I can't look up which one it was.

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Pirate

@ who else erad nuance...

"mines the one with mysql on the back"

Why would you install a database of any type on the back of your jacket? Or did you misunderstand the term "back-end processes"? ;p

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Bronze badge

RTFM

Jive? Did they skip some parts of the manual?

'Important Note About This Release: Only the "Recommended" platform components (Linux, JDK 1.6, Postgres, and Tomcat) and MySQL are supported for this release. Support for other components will be added in later releases.'

At least they read the friendly downtime part.

'A proxy in front of the application server is not required, but can be useful in some cases. For example, a web proxy can show a nice "site is down" message if you restart your application server and it can assist with network port translations.'

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Coat

I wonder if they forgot to patch and got hacked

it's not as if it is hard to keep up with Oracle patching schedules is it

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Coat

Laughed so hard I nearly made a mess

"billed as enterprise-class online community and collaboration software for companies to connect with employees, customers, and partners"

Oh, and Java too?

Oracle have never managed this, when I worked for them some years ago we "upgraded" our project management and billing software to use their Applications suite rather than the in-house systems that had been cobbled together over the years.

They didn't manage to bill people for several months (in the UK).

They never put enough resources into internal projects. If you get them in as consultants they will make sure there are enough and usually deliver something usable, but internal projects, mission critical ones? Clueless.

Plus, all the senior bods who might have been able to manage a project of this size were made redundant in 2001.

It's pretty sad, actually, used to be a good company to work for who were fairly high up the competency tree. Now just another big corp cutting corners that can't be cut and beating up their employees. Clueless.

Mines the one that has the diary with the old support numbers in, that used to work and get you an answer from a human being in less than an hour. Now we pay the same and get one in a day from someone who didn't understand your problem.

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Silver badge

Damn...

I would have much preferred to see a webpage with a DB error on it... That would have been far more amusing.

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Gold badge
Joke

Please try again in a few moments.

How long is an Oracle moment? Is it configurable? How many Oracle moments are a few?

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Boffin

@TeeCee

An oracle moment can be configured using the following command

alter system set ora_moment = '2009' params ( moment_units='YYYY', obscure_commands=true , helpdesk_usefulness=0.0001 ) ;

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Happy

Sour Grapes...

Such bitterness Francis, and you used to be such a jolly fellow too...

Of course, the proper Oracle support resource, Metalink, is there if you ever need some thing more than community based support.

AC because I'm a happy Oracle employee :o)

Where's the Larry-with-halo icon????

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Linux

Classic case, I guess...

...of online hubris by a big corporate. The Oracle product is really good... for just about anything... but, you know sth? It's complete shite as a web back-end. Even SAP don't make the mistake of using their own corporate database products for their web presence (and I'd have thought them much more likely to step in that huzzanga patch than Oracle, honestly...)

Reminds me, btw, of Macromedia, back when they made their own homepage unusable by anybody not in the beta program of Flash 5 (or was that v. 4? Anybody else remember this?) for almost a week. Truly great advertising for using proprietary software on the web...

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Flame

Will the Real Problem please stand up?

<unstrapping flame thrower>

The previous Jive version, hooked into Oracle, worked just fine for Oracle's OTN forums.. for many years,

What has changed? Jive version. The Oracle back-end stayed the same. So who and what and where is the Real Problem?

Not the database back-end.. as indicated as the problem by some idiots here (who are as usual technically clueless when it comes to client-server and a real database server)

I also think that OTN screwed their Jive upgrade big time and they deserve being taken on about this. And this is not the first time, There was an aborted Jive upgrade over a weekend a month or two ago.

However, when you want to on the offensive, get your fricken technical facts right. Or expect me to try and kick you in the nuts. Hard. And repeatedly.

@stizzleswick: you are one of those mate. Totally fricken clueless as client-sever is client-server. Whether the database server deals with a flat client or a thin client or an app server.. does not matter. The database does not know the difference. It does not gives a damn whether the client is Java on Linux box, .Net on a Windows box, or some client on a OS/X or whatever. All clients are equal in the eyes of the server process that services that client session. So your statement that Oracle is "complete shite as a web back-end" only shows that you either are ignorant or an idiot. I trust it is the former as the latter is not curable.

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