The Register® — Biting the hand that feeds IT

NZ sports fans cop eyeful of hardcore

Ash

3 minutes 50 seconds? 

Coat

Those desperate wives must have been disappointed.

The trench coat with the DVD-wallet size pockets, please.

Anonymous Coward

If it'd been the All Blacks vs. England 

Paris Hilton

in 3 min 50 that would have been 3 tries against England that they didn't see.

Oh, just got the All Blacks joke !!!!!

Paris , cos she likes videos

Mr D

3 Mins and 50 seconds.. 

Coat

... meant there was enough time for a smoke afterwards before it was over !

Mines the one with the "toothpaste" stain ...

Anonymous Coward

England tour highlights 

Happy

Clearly it can be explained away as an attempt to show the England team scoring against the All Blacks in NZ

Anonymous Coward

3 minutes and 50 second 

Coat

Although the wives must have been disappointed, 3 minutes and 50 seconds might be just long enough for most viewers...

Mines the one with the stain on it, thanks.

Jon Tocker

Classic! 

Hardcore porn, from what I've seen, lacks any real plot, requires no acting ability and has badly-scripted dialogue read from autocues...

In other words, it'd be a damned sight more intelligent than any thugby match...

Adam Foxton

Next year... 

Joke

It'll be "Desperate All Blacks' Wives"

lansalot

3 minutes 50 seconds ? 

Coat

Might not seem like a long time, but personally, I'd find it more than enough. Is this anything to do with the phrase "rugger buggers" ?

The coat with the pocket with the hole in it please !

Anonymous Coward

Watch Out for the Crack Anti-Porn Squad 

Black Helicopters

I'd love to post a rude and witty comment here, but the crack anti-porn squad, whose job it is to secretly snatch and incarcerate such people, have a nasty habit of striking when you least ex

Chris Collins

Monster? 

Did it have that dude from 'monsters of cock' in it? I have to admit that I was pretty startled when I saw that one. You could pick up peanuts with that one.

James Le Cuirot

Cricket 

Didn't this happen not so long ago with the cricket?

Anonymous Coward

Guess the viewers got 

Coat

A different sort of hooker and scum than they expected.

Welll someone had to say it.

Pass me coat I am leaving.

Anonymous Coward

Porn would make more sense than rugby 

Alien

For a moment there I thought this might have been an explanation for why nearly everyone here seems to watch rugby. It seems that people really do want to watch sweaty men in tight shorts groping one another and making human pyramids.

I wonder what Freud would have made of it.

(New Zealander who isn't even vaguely interested in rugby - hence the alien...)

Mycho

Always blaming the porn 

Rugby is about large men using themselves as battering rams to break one another's bones with a lame excuse of trying to get a misshapen ball to the far end of the pitch, and people complain that sex is harmful.

Seriously, if you want to ban something ban the one which involves stamping on people's heads.

Anonymous Coward

Heard on TV ..... 

Happy

.... tonight on "Good News Week" (Australia), when Cal Wilson said:

" Rugby is like watching bits of farm machinery fight each other ".

Made me laugh.

StillNoCouch

What's the problem ? 

Coat

Sounds like a wonderful idea to boost ratings.

Mine's the one with "Gimme My Ho" on the back ...

Anonymous Coward

Lucky they weren't in the UK 

Coat

Everyone watching the ruggers might have suddenly been nicked for watching 'extreme porno'

Anonymous Coward

Combine Harvester Demolition Derby 

"...watching bits of farm machinery fight each other..."

That's the third reference I've noticed in the last 72 hours to farm machinery brute force contests. And the third ever. Spooky.

blackworx

Re: If it'd been the All Blacks vs. England... 

Coat

...there would've been a hell of a lot more shafting going on.

Jeffrey Nonken

8 years old? 

Alert

"One dad explained his eight-year-old son's innocence had 'been ruined'..."

Balderdash. Kids treat sex matter-of-factly if you do, and an 8yo boy probably finds it boring and incomprehensible. If anything has traumatized him it's your reaction.

You're better off educating him. The innocence won't last past the start of puberty, but the knowledge and understanding will help him through the rest of his life.

Anonymous Coward

If it was New Zealand hardcore porn... 

Paris Hilton

I wonder what the Sheep were wearing/doing?

David Wiernicki

I suppose... 

Thumb Up

...that these are the same New Zealanders who found the black cocks hard to swallow?

Anonymous Coward

Did anyone notice... 

Thumb Up

The first interviewee was called "Tinkler"... there has to be a fetish joke in there somewhere!

Tim

3 mins 50 seconds? 

Doesn't someone actually monitor the outgoing feed? I'm sure I'd notice if one of the monitors had porn on it.

iSuff44

So was........ 

Joke

a ball given to the hooker??

Sorry had to do it!

PT

In other news tonght 

Did anyone notice the other news items at the "3 News" link? Such as -

"Dannevirke brothel to feature All Blacks themed room"

Huw Jenkins

3mins50 

Thumb Up

Is just enough time to crack one off and carry on as if nothing had happened!

Why can't we have more TV "blunders" like that?

Anonymous Coward

god, the risks of watching non pre-screened tv 

We all know that there is the occasional swear word on tv, so we are all well aware that things can go wrong. In fact, during some on-location reports we are just waiting for one of those passers by to jump in front of the camera waving and shouting HI MUM.

I guess parents need to pay more attention to risk management, lest they accidentally emotionally scar their child. Better to pre-screen all tv just in case such a blunder happens. Then when the child is 16 and thinks life is peachy and perfect and are finally allowed to leave the house, reality will come roaring forward, and they will kill themselves, if they don't die from the shock first.

A tragic end, but what a blissful, innocent time those 16 years were.

Christopher E. Stith

We're jealous in the US... 

Paris Hilton

All we got from our Super Bowl a couple years ago was a breast with a pastie-covered nipple, and it was on the nightly news for a week. If we'd had almost four minutes of hardcore porn broadcast over open air, people would have lost fortunes.