Pope gives blessing to anti-christ terrorist squad
Claus P. Nielsen
Or is this in preparation for the big one? #
Posted Thursday 12th June 2008 11:48 GMT

This must surely be the 10076'th sign of the apocalypse.
If anyone knows when it is comming, it is surely The Pope.
Upgrading his "special troops" is just what is needed before the demons come hauling up from the earth.
The cover-up is of course not so much to prevent people from worrying (after all - getting people to worry about their future is what the Catholic church is all about), but rather to catch the Devil unaware.
Ferry Boat
Lil' Devil #
Posted Thursday 12th June 2008 11:52 GMT
There's aliens out there all right. Oh yes, they are coming too. In modified airliners they'll come. Did you know planes have been disappearing from the junk yard in the Arizona desert? Taken and modified by aliens, they were. They'll come soon enough. We'll all be sucked up into the modified planes and dropped into volcanoes. No amount of baggy trousers and madness with guns will save us. They may be amongst us already.
Anonymous Coward
Nobody Expects... #
Posted Thursday 12th June 2008 11:52 GMT

The Gendarmerie Antiterrorism Squad ... Our chief weapon is surprise... and fear...fear and surprise Our two weapons are fear and surprise...and ruthless efficiency.... Our three weapons are fear, surprise, and ruthless efficiency...and an almost fanatical devotion to the Pope.... Our *four*...no... *Amongst* our weapons.... Amongst our weaponry...are such elements as fear, surprise.... I'll come in again.
Graham Marsden
Dahnn daaaahh!! #
Posted Thursday 12th June 2008 11:52 GMT

Nobody expects...!
Steven Raith
@claus #
Posted Thursday 12th June 2008 12:35 GMT
"Upgrading his "special troops" is just what is needed before the demons come hauling up from the earth."
Pff, everyone knows that when the demons come through, the only thing that will stop them is a lone marine, left in his base while his comrades in the initial assault get slaughtered.
he will then enter the fray armed only with a pistol and his bare fists, to take on the hell-spawn.
Hope that helps :-)
Steven R
Stephane Mabille
What next? Anti-peadophilia unit? #
Posted Thursday 12th June 2008 13:01 GMT

Hey,
Vatican is changing... last time they had anything to do with terrorism was during operation Gladio and P2 (Propaganda 2) lodge but strangely enough, at the time they were as effective with anti-terrorism enquiries as they are co-operating on peadophilia cases today!
Gordon Pryra
Ironic #
Posted Thursday 12th June 2008 13:01 GMT
One of the organsitations most likely to cause a war, force 3rd world countrys to have babys and burn people at the stake, given their own anti-terror organsitation.
Is it April1st?
Steve
More of our liberties disappearing! #
Posted Thursday 12th June 2008 13:51 GMT

First it's crack anti-terrorist vicars and the next thing you know they'll be recording our prayers and data-mining them to use for targeted omens so your revelation experience can be more relevant....
redjupiter
Join us #
Posted Thursday 12th June 2008 13:51 GMT
All of you are evidently disillusioned with the pope and his institution. I don't blame you, christian believers are down in numbers, churches are empty, and taken over by mosques, anti-abortion legislation etc ... etc.. etc...
Join us and "ALLAH" "Subhanahu wa ta'ala" will grant you paradise.
Peyton
@Goron Pryra #
Posted Thursday 12th June 2008 13:51 GMT

Hi there, 21st century here, you're welcome to join us at any time you please.
P. Lee
machine-guns are ok but... #
Posted Thursday 12th June 2008 14:53 GMT

will they have the Antiochian hand-grenades?
Unkle Al
Maybe #
Posted Thursday 12th June 2008 15:05 GMT

it's just "God making them stupid"
Chris Seiter
@P. Lee #
Posted Thursday 12th June 2008 16:11 GMT

Ahh, the Book Of Armaments, Chapter 4, versus 9 to 21, unless you skip a bit. Let's just hope that the "Rabbit of Caerbannog" is not resurrected.
Dalen
This reminds me of Civ III #
Posted Thursday 12th June 2008 17:47 GMT

"It will cost 60 gold to upgrade this unit of Pikemen to Riflemen."
I wonder if Vatican already has Barracks built?
(Mine's the one with the Microprose logo)
Peyton
@Unkle Al #
Posted Thursday 12th June 2008 17:48 GMT

You may be on to something... after all, ignorance is bliss, so it could be a reward for their faith
@P. Lee
The Pope already has these. You don't know about them because he keeps them under his hat.
me
Just to set the record straight #
Posted Thursday 12th June 2008 17:49 GMT

The pope is not the anti-christ! He is, however, an excellent candidate for the false prophet, ie, the #2 spot.
Daniel B.
@Steven Raith #
Posted Thursday 12th June 2008 19:56 GMT

"Pff, everyone knows that when the demons come through, the only thing that will stop them is a lone marine, left in his base while his comrades in the initial assault get slaughtered.
he will then enter the fray armed only with a pistol and his bare fists, to take on the hell-spawn."
Nah, this time he'll be given the BFG9000 from the start, after reciting the holy scriptures of IDKFA and IDDQD.
Eduard Coli
Old stuff #
Posted Thursday 12th June 2008 19:56 GMT

Vatican guards have been armed with various types of subs for awhile.
The pole-axe is for back scratching, cheese cutting and beheading heretics.
The costumes are just mod.
Kai Hauschildt
spanish inquisition all over... #
Posted Thursday 12th June 2008 23:01 GMT

this is nothing but a ploy by the vatican to reinstate the spanish inquisition.
thanks to their access to interpol they will now be able to track heretics all over the world.
the black hel(l)icopter because that's what the inquisition death squads will descenfd upon us in.
Anonymous Coward
Wow... #
Posted Friday 13th June 2008 09:36 GMT

The Pope has apparently just found the method to get Creationism taught instead of Evolution in the schools...the Holy Hitmen!!!
Troy Shanahan
Bah, you're all incorrect #
Posted Friday 13th June 2008 09:36 GMT

Has sci-fi taught you nothing? It's always the guys with awesome melee weapons (see pole-axes) that win in a fight. Especially in Sci-fi RTS games. So if the pope has a special command and control screen to order the poleaxe guys around with, they're our best hope of stemming the alien / demon tides. Especially if they were to mount flamethrowers in the ends of their pole-axes.
Mine's the flame-retardant one.
Ascylto
Surprise ... fear ... #
Posted Friday 13th June 2008 09:36 GMT
and ...
The Comfy Chair!
Nobody told us about THAT, did they?
Interpol! Pfft!
Anonymous Coward
Yet again... #
Posted Friday 13th June 2008 09:36 GMT

...the Vatican dazzles us with its modern approach. IIRC, the last such surprise was the pope admitting that the earth is indeed an ellipsoid, only half a millennium after that had been conclusively proven by repeated circumnavigation.
And yet it moves...
@Ferry Boat
Quite the Xenuphobe, aren't we? *chuckle*
Mine's the one with the Operation Clambake print.
Steen Hive
Vatican #
Posted Friday 13th June 2008 12:00 GMT

I for one welcome back our old papal overlords.
john
What about protection of the abused children ? #
Posted Friday 13th June 2008 18:19 GMT
Could the Pope and his 'crack' squad possibly concentrate on protecting the flock first from all the peado. priests ?
$600 million in the state of California and $50 million in Boston paid out to the victims of Catholic Priests child abuse.
BJK
pctechxp
Perhaps the Swiss Guards #
Posted Tuesday 24th June 2008 15:54 GMT
Might have more luck finding Bin Liner