back to article UK's tallest bovine soars to 6ft 6in

A Friesian bullock who measures a towering 6ft 6in at the shoulder is expected to claim the Guinness World Record for the UK's tallest bovine, the Times reports. Chard Chilli and his twin sister Jubilee were abandoned at Ferne Animal Sanctuary nine years ago, when they were just a few days old. Manager Naomi Clarke explained: “ …

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Sam

That's

..a lot of quarter pounders.

Why are the veggies looking at me like that?

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World Record?

Surely the world record for the UK's tallest bovine would be the UK record.

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Joke

Well obviously...

... this story contains a serious load of old bull!

I wonder if the animals were abandoned because they were the result of horrific genetic manipulation, and experimentation into Things Man Was Never Meant To Know? So hard to tell, these days...

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Coat

Old Cow

Perhaps he has some old genes in him. The Aurochs was a breed of cattle often hunted in prehistory which was much larger than our current breeds...

Ill get my red coat and run for it.

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Linux

Vegan winn

That is proof that to stop meateaters VEGANs around the world are genetically engineering cattle to grow extra large and start eating humans.

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Anonymous Coward

Swedish cow terror!

"Chilli does not have a special diet and eats grass, with the occasional swede as a treat."

Better keep Sven away from him...

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Coat

There's no hiding place

cud these puns get any worse? udderly terrible!

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Coat

Hmmmm..

A two metre high Chilli beef. I'll have fries with that, please.

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Anonymous Coward

Good breeding

This pair need breeding off. Such a shame Friesians are lousy beef cattle. Maybe crossed with a decent meat breed...

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What kind of record is that.

Surely it has to be a 'world' record to get in the guiness book of 'world' records.

Otherwise it's not much of record is it.

I reckon that I can break the world record for the most number of press-ups done by anyone in Steves family. Define your group small enough and you can hold any record you like.

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Coat

Yes, I know it's a bull but..

Looks like they're trying to milk the publicity for all its worth....

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@UK record

Perhaps we KNOW it is the tallest in the UK, but the world record isn't known?

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Boffin

The next record...

...surely, it must follow, the UK record for the pat with the widest splat?

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Paris Hilton

Methane?

Watch out for Greenpeace and the other loony global warming fanatics wanting to slaughter the beast usng its no doubt excesive methane production as an excuse!

Paris, because even she knows it's bollocks.

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Flame

Gladicattle

So nothing to do with all the steroids they pump into the cattle these days.. oops! ...sorry wrong side of the pond!

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Happy

I'll have ...

.. 10 litres of pepper sauce and a couple of cases of your finest claret. Bring the fillet first, then the sirloin.. then

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Gav
IT Angle

Deserve It

What does a cow have to do to "deserve" an entry in the Guinness Book of Records?? Is this the same kind of "deserve" you hear so much about on X-Factor?

Cue the sad music;

"Chilli was abandoned as a calf, so devoted his life to eating up his grass every day. He wants to win this word in memory of the mother he hasn't seen in 8 years, where-ever she may be." <Insert shot of sad bovine eye shedding tear, Display vote telephone number>

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Silver badge
Coat

Government Job?

I hear the NuLab spin doctors will be offering him a job - they have a need for a large amount of bullshit.

Mine's the teflon one.

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Coat

I'm the tallest man

at this particular address. Can I get a record, too?

Mine's the red one.

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(Written by Reg staff)

Re: Deserve It

Um, I think you may be taking this a smidge seriously, Gav.

Do you need a cuddle?

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Re: Re: Deserve It

> Do you need a cuddle?

Yes please!

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Happy

Cow on a lead

The Times' picture has the cow with a harness around it's nose, with the keeper holding the lead.

Possibly a bit pointless? If that cow decided it was going, I doubt she could do much about it...

Alan.

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Chilli?? Why the name???

Presumably because he's a Friesian... Freezing... chilly.... get it....??

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Unhappy

Re Good breeding

If you check out the definition of Bullock, you'll see that he (it?) will not be doing a lot of that

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IT Angle

Re: Vegan winn - Beefing things up!

Lets hope he doesn't get together with the lot shown on this link.......

http://www.cowswithguns.com/cowmovie.html

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Silver badge
Coat

Re: Re: Deserve It

Hi Sarah.

I need a cuddle. You free tonight?

Mines the one with the knife holes in the back, which is the result of Ms Bees reaction to this post.

Steven R

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Paris Hilton

@Mark Jan

> Paris, because even she knows it's bollocks.

That was close - one apostrophe away from a libel suit.

Paris, because she prefers a birthday suit.

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Thumb Up

Wow!

Can you imagine the size of the steak off that???

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Coat

I for one

welcome our new bovine overlords.

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Flame

@Alan Edwards

I do beleive that chilli is/was a bull. His sister is a cow.

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Jay
Heart

RE:Deserve it

/me hands Sarah Bee a tazer to defend herself from the El Reg Pervo-bot army following her after her "cuddle" comment.

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Coat

Re: RE:Deserve it

> /me hands Sarah Bee a tazer to defend herself from the El Reg Pervo-bot army following her after her "cuddle" comment.

Oh, taze be Sarah...

Yeah, mine's the one with "PBA Member" on the back

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(Written by Reg staff)

Re: RE:Deserve it

Taze be to God?

Amen.

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Joke

I could...

Make a lot of poop out of that .

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IT Angle

Apart from

the huge amounts of bullshit, what's the IT angle?

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Silver badge
Coat

Sarah Bee

After that atrocious pun, I retract my previous statement.

Shocking.

Steven R

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The IT Angle

Anonymous Coward>

> the huge amounts of bullshit, what's the IT angle?

The it in bullshit possibly?

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Black Helicopters

@Mark Jan

I think yesterdays times had an article about Estonia taxing farmers on methane emissions.

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Crap Beef

As said above, Fresians are not great beef cows, traditionally Dairy, he needs to breed with a good Hereford or something to get some nice Beef, as he is... he'll be sponsored by McDonalds or Cravendale before we know and they'll be milking him all they can....

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Joke

UK's Biggest Cow

I think it was today's Dail Mail that pointed out that Cherie Blair already holds this record ...

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Anonymous Coward

@Scott Mckenzie

milking him??? now that would be a record!!

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(Written by Reg staff)

Re: UK's Biggest Cow

Oof.

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Alert

Re: RE:Deserve it

> Taze be to God?

It should have read "Taze me" - Damn this wonky Dell keyboard!

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@Alan Edwards

Grass skiing ??

@Scott Mckenzie - You pervert !! The only thing one can "milk" out of a bull....

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