What an arse of a robbery attempt that was!

Do we presume he had a change of clothing with him, or was he nicked in the nude? In which case, the police officers should have been able to spot the cash rather sooner than they did.

Presumably now his troubles are over, as he will be vacationing for a couple of years at taxpayers' expense.

But that crisp new NZ currency did not deserve to die.

I thought New Zealand notes where plastic? if so that may have been pretty uncomfortable, not saying that a fist full of paper cash up the backdoor wouldnt hurt, just plastic would be a whole new level.

...papercuts'd be especially nasty... *shudder*

they got to the bottom of that one

If it was plastic, it could have just been wiped clean rather than destoyed. The cash I mean, not his arse.

Pecunia non olet, or do they?

Destroyed? Haven't the NZ Police heard of money laundering?

Oh dear.

...the $2k was in loose "bowels"??

mine's the first one that comes

I just have a rich diet.

So thats where I put my inheritance.

I'm a stripper it and this was a tip.

So you snort coke the other end, that's what I've been doing wrong all these years.

Well I had to put it somewhere I took all my clothes off and burned them.

I really do shit money.

I offered the money to a pretty girl and she told me where to put it.

I'm innocent I tell you, innocent!

Sorry? nah, ambiguity is the meat of the Reg readers (no, not knob meat, cow meat). It sure gives 'piles of money' a different meaning.

Still it was a great crack for a while but got a bum deal out of it in the end.

Still, not many would have had the cheek, though it's an ill wind etc.we tc.

"Would sir like to leave a small something as a deposit"

Innuendo - why does it always sound as if it means something else?

After that little performance, he'll be a very popular boy in prison.

I'd have gladly paid him two grand to get a front row seat.

... quick probe was successfully concluded ?? Well, no one can accuse them plods of taking a very lax(ative) attitude to crime !! All's well that ends well, eh, lads ??

Let's hope it was:

a) All in notes

b) Not $1 bills

For his sake!!

A bum rap in my opinion

would YOUnlike to wipe them?