What really happened
"Mr Brown, we've found no stastically significant between higher risk of mental illness and smoking marijuana, in any form. We recommend you don't change the classification from C to B. We are unanimous in this decision."
"Huh? Oh, sorry... Man, this shit's sweet... Got any Jaffa Cakes? Fuck it... You were saying... Errr... Saying... Weed ain't that bad for you? Or something... Dude go make us all some tea... I'd love some tea right now..."
"Uhhh, Mr Brown... Your eyes are a little red and you seem lethargic. Do you require medical attention?"
"Oh, shit man naw, i'm fuckin' sweet... But seriously, can one of you go get some Dorittos? I want the fucking party size bag man... And a chocolate gateau! GET A GATEAU MAN! Awww that would be awesome OH MAN I NEED TO GO TO BED OH SHIT OH SHIT OH SHIT"
"..."
*Next Morning"
"Good Morning Mr Brown, have you come to a decision regarding the classification of Marijuana?"
"What? Oh, yeah, sure... Uhhh... I was looking over the research last night... Err... My dog must have eaten my notes... Errr... I'll just make it Class B. It'll look good on crime figures, anyway."
True story.
*NB. The characters portrayed in this dialogue are purely fictitious, and any resemblance to any person, alive or dead, is purely coincidental. Hell, if that disclaimer is good enough for Hollywood, it's good enough for me.