I'll back you. I think you need to get started writing shell scripts that express your platonic love for her.
rm -rf /
forgive me if the arguments are ordered wrong, my linux commands are a little rusty.
I do have two serious questions about this though:
1. Is she serious? Does she need friends that badly? I thought she bought them like she buys underwear? Why the search for a BFF who only wants you for your money anyway?
2. What does she look for in a friend? Must enjoy shopping, make up, home made adult videos, partying and generally worshipping money?
3. Okay so I cant count. The article says guys and girls. Somehow I doubt she would pick a make BFF. I dont know many guys who are good at shopping and make up.
You know, I think she deserves pity for this. Either:
a) her life has hit rock bottom - she realizes that life with unlimited money is worthless unless you have someone to enjoy it with.
b) she needs a career/money pick me and thus wants some time in the spotlight.
Personally I would vote for b), but both are pretty sad.