If she spent TWO years sat on his toilet...

Well, where did he go for a shit

Sorry, I know there are at least a dozen other, far more important questions to ask, but I feel I must ask this one above all others.

Is she a bit 'loo-ny'?

Sorry, best I can do on a Thursday afternoon.

"You might want to leave it a few minutes before you go in there"

I'll see that and raise you;

I hope she at least gave it a courtesy flush now and then.

just potty

also, sounds like she hadn't a leg to stand on...

Sounds like things were going a bit down the pan for her and she must of been a bit round the bend!

I refuse to accept this story, please take it away.

Let's not get bogged down with this story...

...but he had nothing to go on.

She gave them the bums rush then? ;)

Must have been a very powerful curry. I've had ones that left me sitting on the thrown for a few hours wishing I'd left some toilet roll in the fridge.

the inevitable flood of toilet humour

Was she a beta tester for Vista? It sure makes me want to lock myself in the bog!

/ Mines the brown smelly one with flies buzzing around it.

Any truth in the rumour that the cops are looking for a "turd" person.

The one where the arms fasten around the back please.

do the usual "dumb american" type thing, but just couldn't bring myself to.

It must have been a particularly interesting issue of Exchange & Mart, or was she engrossed in Autotrader? Inquiring minds need to know.

Na. She probably saw YouTube and felt she could see more interesting things there.

Good thing the seat came away first, that could have been really serious.

I mean, dis-arsed-her.

<tumbleweeds>............

Sit and stink or sit and think? I'm guessing the former...

Getting the boyfriend to pass water through the door.

Do we know what time the call was logged?

mines the one with the snorkel...

She was waiting to sse how things would pan out ?

Maybe there were things she need to get out of her cistern ?

Or it was a chain of events, that left her feeling flushed with success, but unable to keep a lid on things she couldn't get to the seat of the problems

Goodness me I am on a (bog) roll now....

I am certain there is another joke about these two becoming engaged, but I can't quite get it right so will leave it vacant for someone else.

"whether any charges should be filed against the woman's 36-year-old boyfriend"

Hell, yeah. I mean, you might not be able to force anyone *in their right mind* to leave or do whatever. But not doing anything when someone *that* mentally ill, or otherwise not responsible for her acts, is involved sounds definitely criminal to me. It's akin to saying "my 3-year old wanted to jump into traffic in the highway, that's her problem and I can't do anything about it". Although the only way I can see the guy doing that for 2 years is if HE is also terribly mentally ill.

Either way, sad story.

I know El Reg's readership comprises a sarcastic, unsympathetic bunch of SOBs, but for once it's time for the entire readership (including the editors) to practice an emotion called "compassion."

It's obvious that both this woman and her b.f. are a few bricks shy of a full hod, but such is life. Amongst us, there are innumerable sadsacks, usually floating along below radar level and managing to lead their lives satisfactorily by their own lights. Sometimes, as in this case, they are exposed to the glare of publicity, but when that happens remember the old adage "there but for the grace of God go I."

Yes, laugh, snicker, point fingers at, and verbally abuse the pretentious, the publicity hungry, the über-rich, and those who should (and do) know better, but remember some people do not know better. They are to be pitied, not sneered at.

Heart because even techies sometimes have to show some.

How Starfleet of you.

Not to open myself up for ridicule here, but I've been all over these United States. (One of the reasons I'm considering leaving.) And next to Kentucky, Kansas is the most inbred, backwood, hic, country bumpkin place you'd ever seen. It comes as no surprise to find this sort of mental instability. Personally, I find this story completely believable. I wouldn't put it past 'em. There have been people that were so fat they suck in the bath tub, and had to wait weeks for rescue. Trust me, this place is so full of idiots it isn't funny.

O_o

Thank you all for a clear demonstration of your compassion. These people clearly needed help, but didn't get it. I sincerely hope and trust that you all get the same compassion you are so keen to dish out when you're in the shit.

From an intelligent viewpoint, she didn't spend 2 years sitting on a toilet but gradually increased the time period towards the end. I'm fairly sure people can't bond with plastic toilet seats, bedsores equivilent and the failure to repair those sores gives a kind of gloopy pus that dries forming a bond. Sheets have the same properties where patients grow into them.

Depression and the continuing decline of her mental health combined with no impetous to alter her behaviour, no job, friends or family can easily let people slip into a waking coma state. At some point she had the option of facing up to the situation which would probably scare her to death, or spending another day in a lesser painful mental state and so each day passed.

Just a thought - her thighs and backside had sort-of melded with the toilet seat, which would pretty much make it a perfect seal. Also, at least for a while, her bowels would have been acting relatively normally so the toilet bowl must have started filling up to the point where it's actually in contact with her buttocks. And it's quite likely that at some point the smell and everything would make her vomit.

And you know how a syphon works...

Why would anyone want to press charges on the boyfriend... he's the one trying to figure out how much rent she owes him for a 1x1 meter plot. Besides, you'd think her friends would have figured out the echo over the phone was not "poor reception" that she has claimed it was.

I think the one question no one has asked yet is? How the hell did she ever plunge the toilet when it gets pluged?!?!

this sort of story is written the way it is for one reason.... not for any compassion, not for any sympathy.... but for everyone to take the piss out of... to make jokes. to make everyones day that little lighter so that we do not end up in a sorry state where we lock ourselves in the bog...

of course there are the people who dont understand humour ot the concept of what a joke is for...

if you didn't find any of the comments funny, or you found it offensive, considder it a tax against the jokes you do find funny.... becaue i bet it is at the expense of someone or somthing else...

phew, i feel all flushed now....

and just where is the IT angle....

I believe our little friends of the link below will be bored with eating the same stuff day in and day out.

Such a thing would certainly not be allowed in New Zealand

http://www.theregister.co.uk/2007/12/18/wormorator_blues/

Bill Gates: mass producer of alternative food for the fellas of the link above

It's Friday where I am, GMT+12. Summer, too. High tide at the beach today is 1.35 pm. Might take a dip at lunchtime...

I'm with Frank - my mind doesn't want to accept this story and wants it to go away.

Just how much poo-related surealism can El Reg readers take in a day?

(BTW, to those who "feel compassion" my good wishes - just don't come on high-minded and self-righteous when the rest of us enjoy a belly laugh at hapless freaks)

was it fat or puss that held her hostage to that comfy comode?

on the other hand how much did she weight in anyway? (porker, sea lion or orca?)

btw compasion is bit over rated so get on with your lives you huggie feelee types.

$5500/ hour prostitutes, Congresscritters adding telco immunity amendments to bills that cover mental health insurance, and now this. People ... are funny.