The Ministry of Defence has lost 11,000 military ID cards in the last two years, the government has admitted to parliament. Although this seems like a paltry loss compared to the 25m records lost by Her Majesty's Revenue and Customs, it is still rather a lot, particularly when you consider the armed forces amount to less than …
The funniest thing...
... is the idea that I could be handing over my biometric, tell-you-everything-about-me-you-could-ever-possibly-want-to-know ID card to somebody purporting to be an agent of Her Majesty's forces but who is in fact an idle doss-bag who chanced upon a discarded MoD ID card in a bus.
My girlfriend still has hers.
Mind you, she only quit her post 2 years ago!!
You couldn't make it up
Really, all the protests, threats of boycotting the new ID cards and other brouhaha we've seen over the years - is nothing, compared to the UK government's ability to discredit itself. If HMRC's two lost CDs killed any chance of ID cards becoming accepted as mainstream, this just buried it.
As an entirely taxpayer-funded comedy, it's an expensive comedy to behold - but it's comedy nonetheless. Thank goodness I emigrated from the UK - it's a lot funnier to watch from a distance. :)
Re: The funniest thing...
"somebody purporting to be an agent of Her Majesty's forces"
Do you know what a real MoD ID card is supposed to look like? If someone showed you a card with an embedded chip, hologram, photograph and MoD logo, you'd probably assume it was valid, even if it looks nothing like the real thing.
Ironically, if you asked the MoD for a specimen they'd probably tell you to sod off.
Not just armed forces...
It isn't just members of the armed forces that have them. A lot of civil servants have them, and even I have one because I go gliding on an RAF base. So the 11,000 out of 200,000 ratio doesn't really apply.
Fine fine fine
IIRC, the fine imposed on serving members of the forces for loosing their own ID card is equivalent to two days pay.
Pity the pension prospects of whichever lowly civil servant finally gets landed with the blame
So they've *replaced* 11k cards in 2 years, including those that have worn out. And they have issued over 200k cards, so if *none* of the cards were lost, the average life of a card is about 40 years. Not bad.
@The funniest thing...
"somebody purporting to be an agent of Her Majesty's forces"
If someone purporting to be from her majesty's forces asked me to hand over some ID I would simply point out that they have no juristiction over me and they can frankly get stuffed.
Unless they had an SA80 pointed in my direction in which case I don't think the ID would make one bit of difference as I hand over my ID _very slowly with no sudden movements and with my hands visible at all times_.
I diddnt realise that...
We still had 11,000 left in the armed forces with all the defence cuts
So if that was rolled out nationally every ID card would be lost every 24 months, after about 10 years wed be waist deep in them!
A lesson leaned for the dimwits that foster the belief that a national ID card will make the UK aka 'Police state Britain' more secure? No way!
The SA80 is implicit
Just because you don't see the SA80 right away, that doesn't mean it's not there.
1. Person asks you for ID card. You reply "sod off".
2. Person calls over police officer, who tells you to hand over ID card. You reply "sod off" (if you have the nerve).
3. Policeman attempts to arrest you. You resist (if you're deranged enough).
4. Either the police succeed in arresting you, or you prevent that by using sufficient force that they eventually shoot you dead.
I'd still tell them to get stuffed. I'm white with blonde hair, blue eyes, and middle class. Apparently you cant get LESS terrorist than me!
Thank you tabloid media :)
Making political hay out of nothing
Oh come on, its REALLY the governments fault that soldiers loose their ID cards. What the hell does this have to do with the ID card scheme?
How many credit cards have been replaced this year due to loss / theft?
Biggest non-story ever.
"Unless they had an SA80 pointed in my direction in which case I don't think the ID would make one bit of difference as I hand over my ID _very slowly with no sudden movements and with my hands visible at all times_."
Unless it was raining, or freezing cold, or very sandy. In which case I'll take my chances and tell them to get stuffed.
The slight caveat is that it's the second round that jams, not the first.
@The SA80 is implicit
whilst driving over the Mourne Mountains (Na Beanna Boirche) during the Troubles I suddenly had a lot of SA80's pointed at me. "Which part of Belfast are you from", was the Biometric Challenge, "Leeds" was the Yorkshire accented Biometric reply, "have a great holiday!" said the MOD ID card holder, which I didn't ask to see, at the time.
Hang on a minute
A. It isn't the MOD who has lost the card it's the people who they are issued to.
B. Are they really lost, or just not returned by leavers, or destroyed in the washing machine.
C. How does this compare to other organisations or individuals.
I probably "loose" an ID card every five years, how about the rest of you. And by loose I mean leave the company and don;t return the card, destroy it in a washing machine. 5,500 a year means earch individual loosing one about every 18 years, which is pretty good I think, even better if this covers all the other aspects of the MOD.
"I will only give you my name, rank, and serial number."
"Shukran, Tommy, but we already have all of those from your ID card. And thanks to this CD from the National Identity Register we got off eBay we also know the names of your infidel family, the names of all your ex-girlfriends, your political affiliations, the URL of your blog, and your complete medical history which we're just going through at the moment so we know where would be the best place to insert some glass tubes."
"Did I say I was a British soldier? Actually I'm a Saudi prince on my way to a fancy dress party. I knew I should have gone as a Nazi instead."
What are the odds ...
Looking at the figures another way; potentially one in every 5,400 Brits could have an MoD pass someone else lost. Does that make the odds of finding an MoD pass in the street better than finding a stray fiver ?
Paris : Who would sensibly keep her MoD pass safely tucked into her knickers and would thus never lose it.
RE RE: SA80 Jamming
Unless it was the new SA80-A2 which is a different beast . H&K are quite proud of the mods they have made and the troops very happy with the reliability in the field.
Seems a bit stupid running from any MOD guard anyway seeing as he is more than capable to only needing one round to take you down anyway,
On this basis
Can we ask that responsibility for the NIR and its attendant breathing license - sorry, identity card - be handed over to the MoD, please? If they can mange to lose 11,000 of their own there's every chance that they could manage to misplace the entire scheme...
Apparently you cant get LESS terrorist than me
>I shot him sarge!
>Looked like a terrorist sarge!
He was white with blonde hair, blue eyes, and middle class
>In disguise sarge!
Well done - I'm transferring you to the SPG
You're all a bunch of loosers
Okay not all of you but WHAT IS IT WITH THAT BLOODY WORD???
Lose/loose - look 'em up and learn the difference.
No coat: I've lost my loose fitting one
Re: You're all a bunch of loosers
Ah, loosen up.
Of course I agree. I just couldn't resist.
Yes, dammit, and while you're at it, please sort your 'you're' from your 'your'.
Somebody has to say it...
"These are not the droids you are looking for."
Great show for it's day, don't remember any ID card though?
@The SA80 is implicit
You missed a point.
The policement would have tased (tasered?) you first
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