back to article Tom Cruise Scientology vid leaks onto net

A nine-minute video showing Tom Cruise chatting about his Scientology beliefs has leaked onto the net, allegedly much to the chagrin of the Church of Scientology. The four-year-old clip popped up yesterday on YouTube "for a few hours", and was subsequently republished by Radar and Defamer before removal from all three. In it, …

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  1. Dan

    Shock Horror

    A religion claiming to be the one true religion and if only everyone believed in them then all the world would be at peace........no change from normal there then. Every religion on the planet is stark raving bonkers. They all make the "truth" up as they go along, and all they want are two things from you.

    1. Your money

    2. Your slavish and unquestioning obedience

  2. thorns
    Flame

    @Dan

    Sounds like Apple...

  3. Tawakalna
    Alien

    but they promised me a ride on a spaceship!

    which the Catholics didn't. And the Scientificologicalifarians said there'd be aliens 'n' space blasters 'n' lava and all sorts, although the presentation looked suspiciously like an old VHS episode of He-Man & the Masters of the Universe...

  4. Alex

    Possible evidence

    I don't know about other sites but when I tried the youtube video yesterday, I was told it was no longer available due to a copyright claim by the Church of Scientology International. Lovingly uploaded by someone else:

    http://i103.photobucket.com/albums/m144/zomgbbqlol/Whoa.jpg

    Does youtube have a pretty tight system for avoiding any Joe under an assumed name telling them to pull a copyrighted clip? Anyway, it's back up there now and we can all enjoy the frighteningly bizzare ramblings of this 'confused' individual.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3orDPL-Q5eQ

    Possibly restored because CoSI has no copyright just because it features one of its members talking about it?

  5. Steve

    Driving past an accident

    "Being a Scientologist, when you drive past an accident it's not like anyone else. As you drive past, you know you have to do something about it because you know you're the only one that can really help."

    "Help, I've just been hit by a car."

    "Don't worry, sir. There's an ambulance on it's way to you."

    "Sod the paramedics - get me a scientologist!"

    It really does take a special kind of nut to join scientology when even the most perfunctory investigation shows that it was started by a drug-abusing, paranoid schizophrenic fraudster who is *on the record* as saying that the best way to make an absolute tonne of money is to start your own religion.

    Then he starts a religion with massive subscription fees and goes around bullying everyone into staying and giving him money.

  6. Russell Preece

    Pillock!!

    The guy, and the rest of the crazed scientology nutcases, should be locked up.

    "Being a Scientologist, when you drive past an accident it's not like anyone else. As you drive past, you know you have to do something about it because you know you're the only one that can really help."

    What!?? I think you'll find, Mr Cruise, that any decent human being - religious or not - will stop at the scene of an accident to provide aid if the emergency services are not already at the scene. Why does being a scientologist change that?

    And also, stop brainwashing Katie. She still will be my future wife when she wriggles out of your clutches! :o)

  7. jon fisher
    Alert

    What are your crimes?

    For anyone that's not seen it: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ocw90W44Boc

  8. el_zorro
    Linux

    (cheap publicity stunt || spin) | > /dev/null

    why does anyone even give these morons a platform?

    http://www.flickr.com/photos/legolam/20546008/

  9. Tim Seely
    Happy

    Like fish in a barrel

    Where to start with this one? After The Shorts One's erratic behaviour in public, for his lawyer to call anything 'Nutty' is utterly bonkers...

    What was all that about driving past accidents? The sooner this guy and his cult are erased the better.

    Pot/Kettle anyone?

  10. Gilleain Torrance
    Thumb Up

    Hilarious video

    It's not so much the awful, stupid things he's saying but the /way/ he says them. I guess he's not trying to fake sincerity, but the constipated expression on his face as he makes chopping motions with his hand to indicate seriousness...

    What an astonishing fool the man is.

  11. Steve Renouf
    IT Angle

    OMG Talk about Boringzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz!

    No wonder he doesn't do many interviews! Thank god I say. He'd bore everyone to death!

  12. Craig
    Alien

    Origins of Scientology

    "Writing for a penny a word is ridiculous. If a man really wants to make a million dollars, the best way would be to start his own religion." - L. Ron Hubbard

  13. Anonymous Coward
    Boffin

    Eh ? Come again mate?

    You're either in or you're out. You've got a responsiblity to create a new reality. Lets get it done, have enough love compassion and toughness, and do it, and er...do it right...

    Wha-choo-ona-baaat mate? Couldn't follow most of it.

    Plus the outbursts of seemingly hysterical laughter....its like a slightly mad person at the bus stop telling you a joke which only makes sense to them.

  14. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    @ el_zorro

    "why does anyone even give these morons a platform?"

    Why post a link then ?

  15. Matt Thornton
    Coat

    T-wat

    Anyone who has to use "you know" when trying to make their own argument carries zero credence.

  16. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Down

    Getting to the point

    In case you are wondering; the 'help' that Mr Cruise is offering to any accident victims consists of pointing at them.

    Yes, really, no joke. Standing and extending an index finger and pointing. They call it "touch assists", which is peculiar as it involves neither touching nor assisting.

  17. User

    Scientology is extra nutty.

    Xians and others have the benefit of a shrouded past and reading between the lines. They explain away 7 day creation and humans genetic past with parables and the holy book only being inspired by the creator.

    Scientology has no such luxury. Its a fully fledged word by word scifi religion with extra malice and greed.

  18. R
    Paris Hilton

    So...

    Scientology is an ideology based on incoherence sent to save us from our own lucidity. I feel that much safer now.

    "Because there's still the whole thing of; let's go!"

    Paris, because she's cut from the other end of the same cloth.

  19. el_zorro
    Linux

    @alan

    why thankyou sir, that kind of publicity even money couldn't buy :)

  20. Steve

    @ but they promised me a ride on a spaceship!

    That's nothing, the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster has beer volcanoes and a stripper factory.

  21. David Austin

    Title

    Given that religion can get pretty fanatical/ludicrous/dogmatic/ (Delete as appropriate) to begin with, it takes something really special for the entire world - Men, women, Children, Hindu's, Muslims, Christians, Atheists, Agnostics, Pastaferians, and Jedi Knights - to all stop, look, and agree "That's F**ked up."

    L. Ron Hubbard, we salute you - through your pseudo-religion, you've done more to promote world peace than many men before you...

  22. Chris Walker
    Alien

    T Minus 10 seconds... und cownteen!

    Its interesting to listen to Mr Cruise talk so passionately about this subject.

    Its even more notable that every time he says "... get on board" its quite clear he's not talking metaphorically.

  23. Paul F
    Alien

    Hail Xenu!

    Ha! Once again our Thetens corrupt your puny human souls! We spit upon the Cruise and his minions of drooling sycophants! Even now our DC-8 Space Planes circle, ready to deposit alien prisoners upon your hapless world of Teegeeack! The Electronic Ribbon is eternal!

    All glory to the Galactic Confederacy!

    (this is all real Scientology doctrine, for those of you who didn't know)

  24. Ralph B
    Alien

    @Anonymous Coward

    > Standing and extending an index finger and pointing. They call it "touch

    > assists", which is peculiar as it involves neither touching nor assisting.

    Well, according to http://www.scientologyhandbook.org/SH6_4.HTM, it does actually involve "touching", but I think you're probably right about the "assisting" part.

  25. Baserk
    Stop

    re: title

    Pastaferians is a ridiculous and insulting word.

    If you want to be accurate, make a distinction between the real 'whole weat' pastafarians and the non believers aka spaghetti-heads.

    Kind regards

  26. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Up

    If there is an accident involving a load of Scientologists

    Then according to Tom's logic we can safely drive by, content in the knowledge that they can help themselves.

    That's a burden off my shoulders.

  27. Spleen
    Happy

    Scientology vs other religions vs people

    There is a big difference between Scientology and other religions in that its founder started it as a money-making exercise, which meant that Scientology was from the beginning an extremely efficient business operation in which revenue generation is indivisible from participation.

    Other religions had at least an initial phase of genuine belief. When they gained enough followers, they became a money-making opportunity, and then the businessmen moved in. They had to bolt on the revenue generating part to the existing structure, hence the rather clumsy donation/tithing model compared to Scientology's requirement that you pay for courses to move up. Christianity would be much more efficient if they charged for entrance to the church service and premium amounts for baptisms etc, but if they tried they'd be condemned as ungodly.

    Turning a cult of a few hundred members into a religion of millions also creates inevitable conflict with the original holy doctrine. It's so difficult to reconcile the existence of a multinational political and financial powerhouse like the Catholic Church with the more personal philosophy of Jesus that Jack Chick's case for the Vatican being Satanic, based on Biblical verses, is actually quite convincing (or no less convincing than any other interpretation of the Bible). Scientology has no such problem because the organisation was built alongside the doctrine, rather than after it. El Reg's IT audience should have no trouble understanding how superior this approach is.

    So the religions are very different - by which I mean Scientology is better, for its purpose anyway. (The sole purpose of a religion larger than a few hundred members who all know each other is to make money and wield political influence. Salvation, if it exists, can be done in small groups just as well as large ones.) But the religions are exactly the same in terms of followers. Scientologists aren't any more extreme or more gullible than other religious folk. Tom Cruise's weird-sounding comment on stopping at accidents is reminiscent of the large number of Christians who believe that atheists are inherently immoral or amoral.

  28. Paul Vigay
    Alien

    <evil snigger>

    That clip is just dying out for someone to re-edit it and over-dub a wacky soundtrack to make Cruise look like a total nut-job. Oh, wait, hang on. I think he did that himself in the original!

  29. amanfromMars Silver badge
    Alien

    Missions In Definite Improbability Drive..... SurReal HyperRadioProActivity.

    I wonder if Cruise/Wagner Productions are ballsy enough to give Hollywood a fright with AIMedia Blitzkrieg? ..... http://www.theregister.co.uk/2008/01/15/wiretap_policy_landgrab/comments/ .

    I wonder if he/they need to ask permission from the Boss, whoever she may be? A hooker with a heart of gold can capture the heart, body and soul of any Live Being.... and aint that the Sweet and Sweetest of Universal Truths Uniting Artists.

  30. Samantha Clinton

    Where is...

    ...amanfrommars wen you need a lucid explanation...

  31. Nordrick Framelhammer

    No script?

    Was it just me or is Tom Cruise incapable of saying anything coherant without it being scrited for him. Or was the $cientologi$t$ script so aweful, like the editing, that he decided to wing it.

    Although it would not surprise me to learn that, due to his well known overinflated ego, he refused a script.

  32. Anonymous Coward
    Black Helicopters

    Is that your finger?

    3. Give the command “Feel my finger,” then touch a point, using moderate finger pressure.

    Do not touch and then give the command; that would be backwards.

    Touch with only one finger. If you used two fingers the person could be confused about which he was supposed to feel.

    Yep, sounds good,

    Now onto loaves and fish in that other barking religion...

  33. Fraggle

    Just remember

    Thou shalt not judge religion by Tom Cruise.....

    no....really.......

  34. Herby

    A fool and his money...

    are soon parted. Even quicker for a person like Tom Cruise.

    I thought this was obvious, but some people are fools. You split the universe into fools and non-fools, and find out where the money is. It becomes very obvious.

  35. adnim

    My views

    and opinions on this item, organised religion in general and those that practice/believe/do organised religion were too extreme for The Register to publish.

    So, if this is published you will all know how very strongly I feel about such things.

    The end is nigh, for free speech the end is already here.

  36. Anonymous Coward
    Dead Vulture

    KSW.. omg!

    So I looked up KSW, to see what the Xenu Tom Cruise was ranting on about.

    Every course begins with the same Hubbard Policy Letter, Keeping Scientology Working, which establishes the infallibility of Hubbard's so-called "technology." In that PL, Hubbard boldly states, "What I say in these pages has always been true, it holds true today, it will still hold true in the year 2000 and it will continue to hold true from there on out." [...]

    In Scientology, you cannot challenge the word of Hubbard and expect to remain a member in good standing for long. There's nothing whatsoever in Hubbard's writings and recorded lectures that a Scientologist can maintain even the most minor dispute. The Church considers that all disagreements with Hubbard doctrine come from some lack in understanding of the inviolable truths contained in the material. The only option a student has to reconcile a contrary view is to keep restudying the particular area in dispute until the misunderstanding is "cleared up." In this way the rigid dogma of Scientology is preserved, and all thoughts or opinions contrary to Hubbard's view are subdued.

    Fascinating stuff.

    How can us rational pacifists deal with such unbendable lunacy? Maybe we should be a bit more militant in our pacifism too?

    (I included the sick bird one because, well "El Reg" is almost like "El Ron", and yeah...)

  37. Gabor Laszlo
    Alert

    Hail Eris

    No Sacred Chao icon? I'm disappointed.

  38. Mike

    Legal? sabre rattling

    If you believe they stick to legal (let alone ethical) behavior, I'd suggest you research the case of Keith Henson

  39. Anonymous Coward
    Alien

    @amanfromMars

    You're plugging Universal and United Artists in your post? Have you just started work for the MPAA or something?

  40. Fozzy
    Alien

    Scientology and World Peace/Unity

    Cruise keeps reminding us that Scientology is the only religion which will be able to bring about world peace/Unity.

    I would say on that point that he is somehwat correct. Though not through the application of his religion, mainly through all the other religions and in fact anyone with a margin of cognitive function standing together pointing at him and saying

    "Dude your seriously f*cked in the head"

  41. Andy S

    Re: Legal? sabre rattling

    >If you believe they stick to legal (let alone ethical) behaviour, I'd suggest you research the case of Keith Henson

    just the one? I'd highly recommend reading

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Scientology_and_the_legal_system

    Operation snow white alone should have resulted in the whole organisation being dissolved and the leaders ending up in a convenient offshore tortu...prisons

  42. Chris C

    re: KSW... omg!

    "Every course begins with the same Hubbard Policy Letter, Keeping Scientology Working, which establishes the infallibility of Hubbard's so-called 'technology.' In that PL, Hubbard boldly states, 'What I say in these pages has always been true, it holds true today, it will still hold true in the year 2000 and it will continue to hold true from there on out.'"

    "We are at war with Eurasia. We have always been at war with Eurasia." Is it me, or did that PL take a lesson from 1984?

  43. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Up

    @ Steve

    "That's nothing, the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster has beer volcanoes and a stripper factory"

    Wow!!

    Sign me up, where should I send my $$$$$ ?

  44. Anonymous Coward
    Pirate

    Church of the Egomaniac

    Awlright then.

    Here is a religion I made up.

    Because I worship myself I can promise myself that I am a god and everything is mine and I am the bestest ever.

    Top that.

  45. Anonymous Coward
    Alien

    Help Me!

    "the 'help' that Mr Cruise is offering to any accident victims consists of pointing at them."

    Don't they ask how much cash they have on them first?

  46. Anonymous Coward
    Paris Hilton

    Touch assists

    Read the bit in the scientology handbook about the touch assist. It's about reestablishing contact with the injured part of the body and draw attention to it.

    If I had a sprained wrist I wouldn't need some numty poking it with their finger to draw my attention to it!

    Why Paris? Best looking icon

  47. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    @Church of the Egomaniac

    Re: Top that.

    I'm schizophrenic, I've got thousands of followers who all believe in me. At least I think they do, if they'd all stop talking at the same time and listen I might be able to get a vote on it.

  48. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Down

    Christianity doesn't make money

    What's this about chistianity making money;

    "all they want are two things from you.

    1. Your money"

    The DONATIONS I give at my church goes to poorer people, around my area.

  49. Ferry Boat

    @Johan Hartman

    If the catholic church (part of christianity) can afford to pay out $1 billion in settlements to people abused in the US alone then I'd say a fair amount of the money given does not make it to poor people.

    In Chicago alone they have $790 million in assets (2001 figure). Where does all that stuff come from, eh?

    Ref April 2002 article in Business Week:

    http://www.businessweek.com/magazine/content/02_15/b3778001.htm

    The article focuses on the financial problems of the church but boyo are they still rolling in it. I know the article is old but I've only just worked out how to use the internet.

  50. Scott Mckenzie

    But it's religion..

    ...and we all know they're all a load of made up rubbish, mostly followed and run by nutcases with a blinkered belief on what one person reportedly told us.

    I think that about covers it, doesn't it?

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