The Register® — Biting the hand that feeds IT

Former beauty queen cuffed for torturing ex

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Stu Reeves

Bloody hell 

Unhappy

If that is that is the best looking woman they have there, they must have a real good beer !

Alan Potter

IT/Paris Hilton angle? 

Paris Hilton

I really, really am trying hard to see what content here has even the remotest link with IT, Paris Hilton or even the standard joke reports that you sometimes publish. Apart from the wonderful photo (Paris H without makeup, perhaps?) and the "How to Win Friends" mention which made me laugh, I don't know why you published it.

I'm sure somebody does, though...

Dan

holy hell 

she looks a tad troubled.

Smallbrainfield

Smile for the camera! 

I don't fancy yours much, as they say. Is she in a straightjacket in that picture?

Anonymous Coward

Thats Miss Arizona?!! 

Alert

Glad I dont live in Arizona if thats the best they can offer in terms of attractive women. Still, after visits to the US they pretty much look like that everywhere....

Pascal Monett

Not the most savory individual 

Thumb Down

Oh well then, 10 hours of torture and death threats is fine then, right ?

One thing's for sure though : Ms Fulbright is indeed going to become a promising law student - she's going to have an intimate knowledge of the inner workings of a prison.

There aren't enough lawyers that have that knowledge.

Anonymous Coward

Aiiieeee 

IT Angle

That mugshot is truly terrifying! Whatever is she on (and please - don't ever give me any)?

Ken Okumura

The wonders of makeup... 

Paris Hilton

Some of the Google news sites have a "before" and "after" pic...

Tigger in Amsterdam

She's a former beauty queen? 

Thumb Down

Beauty really is in the eye of the beerholder.

I can hear the men in Arizona now...... "Ah ain't gay but ah'll sure consider learnin' "

lansalot

book? 

Coat

"How to Chin Friends and Perforate People" be of more use, surely ?

Ashley Pomeroy

Blimey, it's Medusa 

Paris Hilton

"Oh well then, 10 hours of torture and death threats is fine then, right?"

The implication is that the supposed victim made it all up, or exaggerated wildly.

My first thought was that some people would gladly pay $600 for that kind of treatment, especially the biting, but then I saw the photograph and had second thoughts.

Phil Miesle

here's your Paris angle... 

Paris Hilton

From the Sydney Morning Herald:

http://www.news.com.au/heraldsun/story/0,21985,23001513-661,00.html

Were you male, gay, and a member of the NRA you just might consider switching sides...

Samantha Clinton

Re: Sydney Morning Herald 

Surely the alleged victim should have some inkling of her darker side looking at her choice of props in that photo...

James Pickett

Beauty contest 

Unhappy

"Miss Pima County in 2005"

Well, that's off my holiday destination list...

Anonymous Coward

"hopes to go into entertainment law" 

Coat

RIAA says: You are hired!

Robinson

Oh really? 

Miss Pima County? I don't think I'll be visiting there on my next sex tour......

Anonymous Coward

A talent for ... 

Paris Hilton

According to missamerica.org. Miss Pima County has a talent for "Theatric Interpretation". So the kidnapping was just a piece of street theatre! Alles klar.

Anonymous Coward

@Phil Miesle 

Errrr, no I wouldn't. Didn't know that the Miss (State here) contests allow that kind of display anyway...

Reptar

Re: IT/Paris Hilton angle? 

Alan, please go back and read the article again. It says they stole his cell phone. The iPhone is a kind of cell phone.

Niall

Sod The Angles 

IT Angle

That pic and the comments have made my day. God January is the worst month, Santa didn't fix a single bug I left for him over the Christmas period, lazy so and so.

Daniel

Should have read the book first... 

Did anyone pay attention to the list of stuff the police found at the scene?

"The search-warrant inventory filed in court says that police subsequently found 'an expended bullet at a home in the 1200 block of East Knox Drive along with .45-caliber ammunition, plastic gloves, marijuana, the victim's wallet and briefcase, and a book, How to Win Friends and Influence People', as well as 'duct tape at a home in the 2400 block of North Bryant Avenue'."

Joe

Entertainment Law 

As the AC above says, I'm sure the RIAA are rubbing their hands with glee. She sounds ideal for the job!

Jon Brindley

Miss Arizona 

Coat

I totally misread it as "Miss Amazonia"

Anonymous Coward

Ummmm. 

Pirate

Look a bit like my Ex, one of the wedding photos possibly. Acts like her too.

Gilbert Wham

Job opportunity 

Coat

""a promising first- or second-year law student who hopes to go into entertainment law"."

Kidnap and torture sounds like good practice. She can get a job with the MPAA/RIAA no bother with a CV like that...

Chris Collins

Ridden hard, put away wet 

She looks a little high maintenance. As a side note, I might suggest a lady of her stature would be better off using a 9 mil or a .22 than a .45.

Svein Skogen

The IT connection should be visible for everybody 

Boffin

We all know that duct tape is the tool of choice for any sysadmin under the heel of budget cuts. :p

//Svein

lansalot

and additionally 

Coat

"They're still on the run," Sgt Pacheco said of the brothers. "We have reason to believe they have international ties."

Well, that's not much of a disguise. They'll need more than a fancy tie to evade detection. Chaps, if you're reading this, some sort of hat may be in order. And consider swapping the tie for a scarf while you're at it ?

Stay away from the Groucho moustache/specs combo though - it rarely works.

And she's modelling for subguns.com and yet didn't shoot anyone ? That's clearly a poor choice of model. Wouldn't have happened if Charlton Heston had been there...

Me @ Pentonville.

Matt Bradley

I think I've spotted the IT link 

Coat

"a promising first- or second-year law student who hopes to go into entertainment law"

.. Obviously, with heavy handed tactics like those, she's merely bolstering her CV for when she applies for a job in the RIAA's download copyright infringement legal team.

Anonymous Coward

Better picture of her 

Paris Hilton

Here is a better picture of Miss Desert Sun 2006

http://www.tvshark.net/imgs/c/kumari_fulbright_calendar1.jpg

Brent Gardner

Before and after... 

Stop

Holy shit! That must've been one hell of a meth bender...

Andrew Moore

Correction 

It wasn't torture, it was "enhanced interrogation" because remember folks, America does not torture.

Rick Brasche

@ Pascal 

Unhappy

this is how the American justice system has been perverted, first by celebrities and the rich, now it's filtering down.

It works by essentially trying the victim, rather than proving or disproving that a crime occured or the innocence or guilt of the charged party. You put the victim on trial, "prove" that they're not spotless, and somehow that translates into meaning the crime was justified and the criminal guiltless.

Worked for OJ, worked for Michael Jackson, worked for Robert Blake, and even "Brandy". And that's just off the top of my head.

Similar technique in making the innocent guilty and letting the guilty go free is the South Park "Wookie Defense". Sounds silly but it is eerily similar to how "high profile" cases get off the hook.

RK

Arizona women 

Pirate

i lived in Tucson for a couple of years...there are some stunningly beautiful women there (all that sun and warm weather), partly due to the large University. they are one thing i miss about living there, besides being warm all the time.

this person is not one of them, though at some point she must have been if she was 2-time beauty pageant queen. if the calendar shot is any indication, she's gone pretty far downhill in the meantime. (i'll bet it was drug-related, there's lots of meth in the US these days - her behaviour is classic meth-freak overkill).

since she was on-track to be an "entertainment lawyer," i'd say there's a bright future ahead for her (post-prison) in the "copyright enforcement" division of the RIAA. she certainly has the requisite callousness and vigilante mentality.

Andy S

re: Better picture of her 

I'm really surprised that el reg didn't dig this picture out and use it, it would have put a completely different slant on the story, of being tied up and tortured.

Ron Eve

Worth remembering the IT angle... 

Coat

Sometimes, we just need to remember what the rules of life really are:

You only need two tools: WD-40 and Duct Tape.

1. If it doesn't move and should, use the WD-40.

2. If it shouldn't move and does, use the duct tape.

yeah, right.

Nice touch. 

The mention about the book was a nice touch. She'll go far with the RIAA or the US Dept of Justice, Guantanamo Division.

Anonymous Coward

Yuk 

Paris Hilton

Behold the changes that Methamphetamine have wrought.

As it's been said the kidnap torture etc is classic Meth head behaviour.

Steve Roper

@ Rick Brasche 

Flame

Only if the victim is white and male.

Anonymous Coward

Facial wounds 

Pirate

and all that behavior it's more than likely she's smoking ice not methadrine it's plain old Amphetamine not Methyldesoxyephedrine it's expensive but not hard for someone like her to get, yuck bad drugs no fun for her now she's got some detoxing to do. She is probably on suicide watch as well. Bad decisions snowballing. She'll die young as well. It's hard to look at but maybe it's helpful for younger people to see if they don't gloss it over.

Anonymous Coward

Book 

Why would they include that book in the items found. We recently read it in my book club and it was originally published in 1935.

Mr Larrington

She's doomed 

Paris Hilton

`In court, Fulbright's attorney Tom Hartzell described his client as "a promising first- or second-year law student`

Dear lady, if your lawyer doesn't know whether you're a first or second year then you are almost certainly going to gaol.

Anonymous Coward

Duct Tape 

Happy

Duct tape is rubbish against a struggling victim, just tried to Duct tape a colleague to the chair (its a slow day!) and it just rips too easily, going to try electricians tape when the suspicious look has gone (and the twitch)

p.s its called Gaffer tape here !

Want my BOFH fix NOW !!!!!!

Anonymous Coward

I Concur 

Thumb Up

I travel to AZ often to see the in-laws and have nothing better to do than to hang out and watch the hotness. I live in Orange County and the women of AZ are more attractive because they come with OEM parts and without the bad OC attitude that makes you think OJ was on to something.

Steve Wedge

@ Chris Collins 

Coat

Damn, you stole my title!

That's pretty far down to go by age 20, that's for sure.

Oh, well. One less lawyer, methinks.

Anonymous Coward

Oxymoron 

Wannabe an American Beauty Queen?

All you need is

* large hard breasts, natural or otherwise

* more testosterone than the average male in the rest of the world

* enormous supply of razorblades to shave *everything* other than the hair on the top of your head.

Ishkandar

Duh ?? 

Coat

He was tied up with plastic cable and duct tape and held in *TWO* places ?? Did he feel a tad cut up by that and who got which bit of him ?? And after all that, he still manages to grab a gun ??

He should call himself - Houdini : Return of the Master !! - and make a fortune touring with his act !!

The_Police!

Queen of Stone .... 

Coat

Medusa!

NO! NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

I am turning to stone!

Just getting my coat.

Turbojerry

re:Worth remembering the IT angle... 

Coat

Remember Duct Tape is like The Force, it has a light side and a dark side and it binds the universe together

pctechxp

Maybe she's been at the Sands of Time 

She looks like a female version of the Dark Prince from Prince of Persia: The Two Thrones to me.

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