Why not use a back propagation artificial neural network to classify the signals, that way he could sit with something to detect his eye movements and train the device himself. I'm sure it'll take less time if he can just practice on his own, save the doctors time etc...

"oh", "ee" and "oo"

I am suspicious these are Witch Doctors. Next he'll be learning "ah", "ting tang" and "walla walla bing bang".

Seems more likely that they're just training him to be a porn star. Not quite sure how that would work with the paralysis thing though.

How long 'til they can embed a bluetooth module in my brain to give me some always-on internet access? They'd probably have a line of very eager nerds sign up to test that one out.

"How long 'til they can embed a bluetooth module in my brain to give me some always-on internet access?"

Bad idea. Are you familiar with "Ghost in the Shell"? In that SF manga, people had all sorts of embedded interfaces. And they got *hacked* all the time! Leave me out of the way-too-connected-internet, please!