arrested and jailed here in the US, to save the school from having to explain how she got in.

... confused with "Girl with butt creams..."

Thats not fair, that stuff never happened when I went to that school!!

I feel sorry for the guy on his stag night that got the gorilla.

"No one could believe it. Next she ordered him to get on all fours, led him around the classroom and hit him 16 times - once for each year - on the bottom with her whip."

In Scotland she'd have been arrested for child abuse.

I think you are most likely right there, or worse.

Check out this story from yesterday in the good old US of A.

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/21661718/

Girl, 13, gets detention for hugging two friends :O

i sure as hell would have paid a lot more attention in class if there was semi naked ladies asking to have cream rubbed on their butts. Gets a big thumbs up from me.

When does one 'come of age' in the UK???

Oh look at the time, got to run...

the pictures??

"No one could believe it. Next she ordered him to get on all fours, led him around the classroom and hit him 16 times - once for each year - on the bottom with her whip.

"And in case you're wondering what kind of parent would subject their offspring to this kind of humiliation, the mother in question told the school she'd actually ordered a gorilla "through an agency", but got the cream-loving dog-handler instead. "

...Clearly Mother had heard Junior talking about "spanking the monkey" and just got a bit confused... Could happen to anyone, really...

is really beating himself off about it

@ John

"semi naked ladies asking to have cream rubbed on their butts. Gets a big thumbs up from me"

We don't want to know about your thumbs or where they've been.

Pictures???!

You can't tell me that class wasn't full of mobiles snapping away!

So where did he run off too? As a 16 year old boy probably into the mens to sort out the things that pop up!

I have to know, the teacher stood there watching for ages. Until the boy was supposed to rub cream on the stripper. Didn't she notice the woman moving around in her underwear????

Wish I had that at school

if I cant see any pics or vid, then it never happened

Somebody must have been on some seriously potent butthash (ttp://www.theregister.co.uk/2007/11/06/jenkem_warning/) to mistake a stripper for a gorilla .

You can still legally smoke at 16. You just can't legally buy your coffin nails until you hit 18. No, I don't understand it either.

You can also buy your own beer, wine, cider or perry as part of a meal order at age 16 (having been allowed to drink the stuff since 5, under parental supervision; and "Two pints of wifebeater and a bowl of chips" doesn't count).

From 18, anything legally allowed is yours.

Bad show - but if you were there maybe you'd have needed strawberries instead of sweets...

Ah, at least you get everything at age 18 in the UK. The US screwed up some stuff by letting tobacco at 18, but alcohol at 21. Thus even if "coming-of-age" is at 18, you still are barred of most "cool" places because they have a strict 21+ policy. Idiots. </rant>

Anyway ... that birthday party beats the stripper-shaped cake once proposed for a friends' 20th birthday ... whoa!

In the UK there is no "age of whatever", because the legal systems vary. What may be 16 in Scotland is 18 in England and Wales, and can be 21 in Northern Ireland. Many things, however, are national, such as voting, alcohol and films. It's a sad thing that you can get married in Scotland without parental consent at 16, and while you can then legally and morally shag the missus, you're not legally allowed to watch 18-rated soft porn. You can also join up and serve in Iraq at 16 but you're still not allowed to vote for two years, but that's another issue.

Where's the photos?

To be fair to the teacher, you could tell she was just stunned - and when the cream came out she told the stripper 'That's it. That's enough'."

<give me a couple of minutes and I'll be right to go again/>

is torture enough. Brittney Spears can turn something that I wished would have happened to me, into something that would scar me for life. I think the guest of honor fled because of the soundtrack.

@Luther Blissett "It is legal for me (or you) to sodomize a 16 year old in the UK, but illegal to give them a cigarette afterwards (18 up only). It's a mad mad mad world."

Sodomy is illegal in the UK under Section 61 of the Offences Against The Person Act 1861. I beleive this has never been repealed?

pics or STFU.

BTW, I think we need an icon for "Pics or STFU".

What say ye?

In the US, you can go to war "for your country" at 18, and get your legs blown off, and get stuck in a chair. Then, if you come back and get drunk because your life is now in shambles, and wheel around town like any self respecting wheel-chair-bound-alcoholic, you can be arrested for under-age consumption and driving under the influence.

In my day the sex education class was given by the biology teacher who demonstrated a bunsen burner being shoved into a hole in the sink cover. How much more interesting those particular lessons might have been with the Paris Hilton lookalike taking part.....