Where's the Paris Hilton angle?

Do the police suspect fowl play?

...put all their chickens in one basket, eh ?

Cloakroom ?

And the IT angle is :-/

...so did any of the chickens cross the road?

extern taxi(coat);

"The ruffled poultry were reportedly transported to Noble Foods' processing plant, and the Scottish SPCA not unreasonably expressed concern for their welfare. Spokeswoman Doreen Graham explained that "many of them could be in shock and may die"."

"not unreasonably expressed concern"...They're on their way to a feckin' slaughterhouse...does it really matter?? It just means there's about 10,000 less chicken twizzlers hitting the supermarkets this week!

> suspicions that YouTubers may be

> about to enjoy shaky mobe-captured

> footage of the chicken carnage.

WHAT-captured??

Lesterrrrrrr!!

Police report that the road network has been completely clucked up as a result of too many chickens crossing highways.

Fowl play is suspected

Last time I'll play 'chicken'.....

ok,ok,ok.

(Hope the driver recovers fully soon.)

I fear that the mortality rate for the poor old chickens will be 100%, I don't see many of them living past sundown.

A : Spokeswoman Doreen Graham explained that "many of them could be in shock and may die".

Erm. weren't they on the way to the slaughter house, so what does it matter.

B: Bloke on phone to Wife "Darling I'm going to be a bit late the traffic is foul today"

Yes, yes ..

Mine is the full length leather coat,

"many of them could be in shock and may die"

Maybe Doreen Graham is confused about the chickens final destination and thought that they were on their way to a poultry themed health farm?

Or is "processing plant" a Scottish term for Amusement Park?

Oh, how appropriate the dead vulture icon is for this story!

obviously that many IT workers in Scotland were late for work today due to the traffic congestion. Duh!

Tarred and Feathered?

going to be hauled in front of the beaks for jay walking??

"police "appealed to motorists on the north bound carriageway not to slow down"

So how much damage would hitting a chicken while doing 70mph do to a car?

I can guess the damage it would do to the chicken.

And that includes "mobe-captured". Shame on you, Lester.

http://www.theregister.co.uk/2005/09/09/mobe_poll_result/

Which was worse, the jams as a result of the crash or the rubber-neckers taking photo's? I think its a chicken and egg thing...

--> I'll get my butchers apron

Look out for Paris's new s*x video on websites soon

*looks for directions to coat-room*

Is there a Specialist Team for Chicken Catching? One ready to roll at short notice, wearing high-vis jackets with "Chicken Catcher" on the back?

Is this team limited to Scotland, or do England and Wales have their own squads?

And do they use Minority Report-style hovercars?

Might as well scoop up the 400 casualties and send them to the plant as well.

CHICKEN TWIZZLERS FOR THE WIN!!!!111!!!!11!!!!

*throws up*

"CHICKENS! Tonight, we('re) dine(ed on) IN HELL!!!

On a side note, perhaps leaving some of the unfortunate early departures lying about would solve this other wee Scottish flap:

http://www.theregister.co.uk/2007/10/09/vulture_escape/

On a side side-note, my Google ads for this comments page are "Live Chickens". "Backyard Poultry", and "Internet Security". "Internet Security"? Where's the poultry angle here, I ask.

awarding the Poulet-zer prize for the story...

(ducks out quickly)

Some news is too important to be arbitrarily pigeonholed! (And, obviously the IT angle is the warning not to use mobiles while driving. Duh!)

at least the chickens had a good workout before they got to the processing plant. of course the weak ones were 'plucked' out...natural selection? We should have this more often, aye?

"Is this team limited to Scotland, or do England and Wales have their own squads?"

Wales does. Only it's for sheep. Over there though, they aren't a "Specialist Team" they're called "citizens".

Left my coat in the car, no need to stop on the way out.

Living and working next to this made my day.

Hourly updates on local radio describing police chasing chickens inspired thoughts of the Rocky movie only in a non-confined area - still brings a smile to my face when I think of it.

Yes it did grid lock the area but for something out of the norm - a little step out from all the run of the mill bad things.

The IT angle - it made this IT workers day (maybe even week)

Don't know about 70mph but this is what happens at 160mph!

http://www.car-accidents.com/2006-Auto-story/10-18-06_porshe_chicken.html

Have we just been given some mis-information? According to a crapy Insurance company ad (rhymes with p****d cover) they are probably call centre staff on their way to work but ended up at the slaughter house... just need to get one of the slaughter houses in India... especially for IT (as in "it" support... not IT!!!)

The police started the jokes when some spokesman did their bit for the local radio traffic reports ... "it's a foul morning for motorists" was the phrase they used IIRC.