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back to article Boffins offer explanation for meteorite sickness

Relax: the aliens aren't using poisonous space rocks to soften us up in advance of an invasion, after all. Last week, you may recall, a meteorite fell in Peru. Locals who were first on the scene reported feeling ill immediately after contact with the space rock, with symptoms including headaches and nausea. Speculation began …

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They're Here....

So, this Luisa Macedo. Did she happen to display any emotion at all? She wasn't outside pointing at people and wailing at the top of her lungs, was she? Did she, by any chance, get spotted loading a bunch of what appears to be giant pea pods into the boot of a military vehicle?

I only ask, as over here in old blighty we've got some pretty strong weed killers. Will I need to stock up?

Enquiring minds need to know!

K

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Hmmm

Swamp Gasses? I heard it came down in some rather arid desert?

Never the less, it seems the crater is now full of water somehow...

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ULLA!

They're lucky they didn't get hit by the Martians heat ray.

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Anonymous Coward

Title

Well meteroites contain 'a lot' of ICE etc - so perhaps when landing this melted and is now causing the water filled hole?

Dont get me wrong - I'd love Aliens to be present - they might whip the world into some decent activity - other than HDTV and Carbon sodding Footprints! We need a new enemy and short of murdering all PC people - Aliens would be a good focal point - I mean we have Team America to protect us - don't we? :)

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Anonymous Coward

doom

I've seen the Andromeda Strain. Remember, don't nuke it or we are all doomed.

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erck

They've already taken over key parts of the Peruvian government!! Everyone grab a manual can opener and a base ball bat. The government doesn't want us to know they're in league with these Aliens.

But they've been tricked, the Aliens will harvest our organs in true cult sci-fi fashion!

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Bronze badge

Ack-ack, ack-ack

Anonymous (but reliable) authorities inform me that the affected villagers were treated using a continuous playback of Slim Whitman's greatest hits. Sadly, although their bodies are now nearly healed, the results of this cutting-edge therapy have utterly overwhelmed the local mental health services.

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Anonymous Coward

Learning to Fly

Do the locals now have a strange scar on the back of their necks? Can they bend their little fingers properly? Have local figures of authority started to die of unexplained cerebral haemorrhages? Has an out-of-town architect recently lost his way on a lonely road, looking for a shortcut that he never found?

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Anonymous Coward

Thicko

'Prolonged exposure can lead to digestive problems, cancer, diabetes, liver disease and thickened skin.'

George W Brush must be suffering from prolonged exposure to arsenic. He's showing that there final symptom. I wonder who's trying to do him in.

What's that coming over the hill?

Is it a monster?

Errr... no, looks like a black helicopter.

I'd better go now....

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Anonymous Coward

They've already got the Peruvian Gov't!

Boys and girls, be wary of anyone who has been to Peru recently as it is obvious that the Peruvian government has been infiltrated by the Marshuns!

It doesn't take a Fox Mulder to work this one out...

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Invasion

Dont worry guys the invasion wont last.

The sherriff will try and get everyone to dive into a lake during a storm, in Florida

and then the invasion will end on a cliff hanger and we wont get to find out what happens because some beauracratic Alien, holding the purse strings will say the INVASION is too expensive and cancel it.

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Bronze badge

Probe.

I really don't think it is possible to arrive at a conclusive diagnosis of the health problems caused by this `meteorite´without conducting exhaustive anal probing, it's the only thing these people respond to.

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Anonymous Coward

thickened skin

I can think of several times where this may be a positive side effect. Mountain biking and roller blading come to mind.

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Our bcteria will do them in

Just remember that at the end of the War of the Worlds, the Martians were overcome by bacteria.

Now where's that Anthrax......

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Anonymous Coward

Dear Journo-hacks

Stop calling us geologists boffins!

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Anyone fancy a trip to Iscandar

Only takes about a year once you get started. Since the killer meteors have started falling, I expect contact from a benevolent alien to give us engine plans to go meet them and get the cure.

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Cold comfort

Unfortunately for this theory, meteorites are cold when they reach the Earth.

www.skymania.com

Paul

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