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back to article Drunk-astronauts doc says NASA is in denial

The US Air Force doctor who led an investigation which reported that NASA astronauts flew drunk has criticised the space agency's subsequent review, which concluded that he was wrong. Colonel Richard Bachmann also suggested that management attitudes indicated a culture of silence at NASA. News agencies reported today that …

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*hic*

Beem me up schkotty *hic*

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Anonymous Coward

Not sure how they could be drunk....

I am sure this was probably said when the original report came out but considering the isolation the astronauts go through just prior to a launch I cannot see how they could get drunk before a launch. Even if they somehow could sneak a drink in, considering how long they sit in the shuttle before they launch they would probably be sober by the time the launch happens anyway!!

Besides, the first return to flight mission after Columbia broke up, I wouldn't blame them wanting a drink before the launch!!

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Anonymous Coward

Never pooh-pooh a pooh-pooh

"Even if they somehow could sneak a drink in, considering how long they sit in the shuttle before they launch they would probably be sober by the time the launch happens anyway!!"

And even in this day and age, who would want to drink something that promotes mass peeing just before taking off in a spacesuit? Perhaps the stains wouldn't show on one of those orange flight suits, but the smell would be awful.

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MmmmHmm...

This guy just sounds a little off to me. He sounds like he is throwing a fit because NASA called him a liar, even though he can't point out any names, dates, or witnesses to substanciate any of his claims.

And of course being the wonderful citizen that he is, he waits until some chick goes off the deep end before trying to tell the public that astronauts have been flying drunk.

Not to mention that pretty much all of the shuttle launches are pretty well televised.

This is all just too convenient.

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Anonymous Coward

"who would want to drink something that promotes mass peeing just before taking off in a spacesuit?"

IIRC, Alan Shepard urinated in his suit on the launchpad in his Mercury capsule (though not alcohol-related, I should point out).

So it wouldn't be the first time somebody wet their spacesuit just before takeoff.

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Ideal place to be bladdered

I don't know much about space, spacesuits or the shuttle, but don't they have catheters fitted when they are zipped up in their suits?

If so, it would seem to be the ideal place to be completely bollocksed through drink, as you'd never need to leave your seat and the computer flies the thing anyway.

In fact, given that you are sitting on a squillion gallons of explosive material, protected by a layer of tiles that keep falling off and guided by computers that might have been sabotaged by a disgruntled contractor, that's pretty much the only way you get me on the bloody thing anyway.

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Ron

Re: *hic*

I believe the line you were looking for is:

Kirk: *hic* Jimbeam up, Scotchy!

(Which, of course, is from the classic TV Series Bar Trek)

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nappies

Astronauts wear nappies under their suits at launch, landings, and I assume spacewalks. Seriously. Where do you think Nowak got the idea from?

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@Evil Graham

"given that you are sitting on a squillion gallons of explosive material,"

Oh, I don't know, tequila's not that explosive, and they surely can't have drunk that much of it...

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Deals with concerns?

"I do deal with any concerns brought to me." right. Unless, of course, they're concerns about stuff falling off the shuttle and the shuttle possibly blowing up. Those concerns we'll just sweep under the carpet.

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Anonymous Coward

@Rachel

"And of course being the wonderful citizen that he is, he waits until some chick goes off the deep end before trying to tell the public that astronauts have been flying drunk."

Um ... he was part of the panel investigating behavior within NASA *after* the Happy Nappy wearer decided to chase and mace.

So unless the guy has a crystal ball ...

The fact that you called a US Air Force officier a "good citizen" - like he's just some run of the mill guy who barged into this conversation without invite - shows just how far off mark your rant is.

(anonymous so I don't have anyone trying to mace me in revenge ;-) )

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Anonymous Coward

So which is more likely

So the astronauts some of whom are risking courtmarshall

or being fired go through all sorts of complex maneuvers

to get drunk and hellishly vomitose or someone lied to colonel

Sanders someone with a vivid imagination likely to believe

odd things about others out of the blue that doesn't sound like it couldn't happen.

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Anonymous Coward

who can blame them?

I'd have to be well bladdered before i went anywhere near one of them things.... I'll fly Russian and party in orbit instead thanx.. goodness gracious great balls of fire.......

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Who cares if they're drunk

Its the chimps that fly the damn things anyway :D

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Anonymous Coward

Who would notice?

If the Shuttle goes up and comes down OK and the crew gets their work done correctly and on time does it matter whether they're plastered or not? I think what we're seeing is a little protuberence of the Temperance mindset into their world -- drink is bad, the evil demon therefore anyone found consuming it is an immoral drunkard and therefore undeserving of hero status......or even a job, for that matter.

Seems Dr. Bachmann has a bit of a problem himself....

BTW....I think drink is evil myself. I'm just not going to ram my beliefs down others' throats.

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Anonymous Coward

I don't know about having a drink...

...before a spaceflight. I think xanax or a valium would be more apropos.

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@Neil Weller

If you look at previous articles on the reg regarding this subject (cant be bothered digging them out) you will see that the relaxation suite provided by NASA, pre-launch, has alcoholic beverages stocked

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Ha.

"Bachmann's independent panel was convened after the arrest of astronaut Lisa Nowak, following her nappy-clad crosscountry odyssey and alleged attempt to mace and kidnap a younger rival for the attentions of her extramarital squeeze, space shuttle pilot Bill Oefelein. Nowak's legal team has filed psych documentation hinting that they may be considering a defence of temporary insanity.

Colonel Bachmann's probe found no further scandals of this sort among the 92 astronauts on flight status, indicating that in fact the space aces compare favourably in terms of lurid private life to other high-profile selective groups such as politicians. But Bachmann's group did report that there had been several cases of space crew drunk on launch day, though no details of name and date were given. It was said that concerns had been raised, but ignored by bosses."

You said probe.

...

I'll get me coat.

And I can say that even though I'm not English because I looked it up on UrbanDictionary dammit.

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URL

I started falling off my chair (through laughter, not alcohol) before the page had even loaded. Just reading the URL in the address bar did it for me :)

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