well #
Posted Wednesday 5th September 2007 09:56 GMT
well more likely to work at fixing planes then London underground "workers" running the tube.
Pehaps if we sacrificed a few animals to the god of signalling all would be fine?
Posted Wednesday 5th September 2007 09:56 GMT
well more likely to work at fixing planes then London underground "workers" running the tube.
Pehaps if we sacrificed a few animals to the god of signalling all would be fine?
Posted Wednesday 5th September 2007 09:56 GMT
It's a good thing they weren't sheep. The Welsh would be calling them racists. :P
Posted Wednesday 5th September 2007 10:35 GMT
If it makes you happy,
It can't be that baaaahahaaahaaad!
Posted Wednesday 5th September 2007 11:12 GMT
..this would work on some of the systems where I work?
Posted Wednesday 5th September 2007 11:12 GMT
Surely another revenue stream for Ryanair; tick here for Goat Sacrifice; £3 or £5 if you pay at the airport.
Posted Wednesday 5th September 2007 11:12 GMT
I can only imagine a new service contract scheme for Nepal airways on a pay per sacrifice basis , they could even call it 'Pay as you Goat'
Posted Wednesday 5th September 2007 11:12 GMT
Well,
A good scapegoat is nearly as welcome as a good solution
Have a look at the poster below
http://demotivate.org/pages/posters/solution/solution.htm
Posted Wednesday 5th September 2007 12:00 GMT
I wonder what was on the in-flight catering list that day?!!
Posted Wednesday 5th September 2007 12:00 GMT
... fly on Nepal Airlines. Ever.
Posted Wednesday 5th September 2007 12:00 GMT
If BAA could use this to get their quite frankly astronomical queues down to under 2 hours?
Posted Wednesday 5th September 2007 13:56 GMT
Goatware for Windows
Posted Wednesday 5th September 2007 13:56 GMT
...would use a sheep?
[Coat on, boarding pass in hand]
Posted Wednesday 5th September 2007 13:56 GMT
I knew my method of computer fixes would catch on.. I've sacrificed a number of chickens at a users desk while working in desktop support. Worked a treat and they've never asked for their computer to be fixed again. ;-).
Posted Wednesday 5th September 2007 13:56 GMT
Of shake a dead chicken, simply
calming the god of the white smoke.
It worked didn't it they know what
they are doing (cancels nepalese
flight).
Posted Wednesday 5th September 2007 13:57 GMT
I would certainly find it reassuring to have fly with an airline that has a belief in essential things to flight, like pretend friends (Santa Clause, Tooth Fairy, god etc...) rather than non-essentials like regular maintainence, experienced pilots, Radar. There can be no doubt that the goat slaying would have been critical to the success of this flight, and all airlines should sack their maintainence staff and replace them with quadraped-loathing axmen instead.
Posted Wednesday 5th September 2007 13:57 GMT
Certainly NOT goat - they need to keep the spares for in flight electrical problems...
Posted Wednesday 5th September 2007 13:57 GMT
No, management accountability is the way forward for BA, let's sacrifice a few of their executivesif the queues don't go down and the whole board when they not only loose luggage but fail to get it to you and just auction it off instead!!!
Posted Wednesday 5th September 2007 14:09 GMT
... that'll take an elephant, brown bear and cart horse sacrifice
Posted Wednesday 5th September 2007 14:39 GMT
I can't be the only one who propitiates the Machine God with a sacrifice to fix an unstable network/dodgy Windows install/whatever.
It works at least as well as calling Support.
Posted Wednesday 5th September 2007 15:35 GMT
I hope theyve got an emergancy goat on board for when the wings fall off cos they didnt actually repair them.
Posted Wednesday 5th September 2007 19:44 GMT
Can you imagine the conversation beforehand,
Pilot 'The plane is due to fly in 10 minutes and the engines aren't working'
Engineer: 'Well mate, your out of luck. Left the tools at home today.'
Pilot ' What! Why?'
Engineer 'Well it's bring your pets to work day innit. Have you tried carrying a tool box and dragging two angry goats?'
Pilot 'Isn't there anything you can do?'
Engineer 'Weeeeellll. We could sacrifice the goats to the god of air. Only got em cos the wife likes the mangy things. Make a right mess of the house'
Pilot 'Will it work?'
Engineer 'Dunno. Lets give it a try. No harm in it'
Pilot (eyeing the queques of angry tourists) 'Ok, ok. Just be quick'
Cue two dead goats.
Posted Wednesday 5th September 2007 19:44 GMT
I'll bet the grossly overpaid engineers at Boeing are scrambling to find a local supplier of properly vetted sacrificial goats.
Maybe the gullible corporate owners will now see through the folly of hiring slugs who drank their way through 4, 6, 8 years or more of higher studies.
Once again, the value of out-sourcing is revealed for all to see.
Posted Wednesday 5th September 2007 19:44 GMT
Is it penny beer at the pub today? I posted nearly 2 hours ago and my wiseness has not yet been passed on to the (un)deserving folk.
Is my previous remittance of 200 US dollars (per your instructions) for this month no longer sufficient to cover your "publication costs" for my posts?
Posted Wednesday 5th September 2007 19:46 GMT
A good ol' SCSI issue needed to be resolved.
"SCSI is *not* magic. There are _fundamental_technical_reasons_
why you have to sacrifice a young goat to your SCSI chain every now and then."
Posted Wednesday 5th September 2007 20:27 GMT
Makes more sense than prayers to an invisible-sky-daddy or god-on-a-stick.
Posted Wednesday 5th September 2007 20:53 GMT
my previous heretical statements and/or claims.
I have never paid any amount of compensation to any person affiliated with theregister.co.uk. I do realize I may have transgressed the boundaries of legality in an attempt at humor. My sincere apologies to any who were offended.
I and my family thank you for your assurance that no retribution will be carried out against us. You are too kind.
Faithfully, Tony
Posted Wednesday 5th September 2007 21:23 GMT
and a new technology services career is born.
this one really will require high priests - i always wanted to see that on a business card.
and if the sacrifice doesn't work, the priest can always intone, "THE GODS ARE ANGRY, we must now sacrifice all who complain." that'll shut them up.
Posted Wednesday 5th September 2007 22:10 GMT
So, from what I read of Tony's statements I didnt REALLY need to pay that two thousand million zlotis into the unnamed Polish band account in order to be able to post my inane comments on el reg.
Bah humbug! That's another £5.20 wasted :(
Posted Thursday 6th September 2007 00:07 GMT
What is wrong with the world. All this talk of "using" animals and PETA hasn't complained?? There must be some mistake!!
Oh, I'm sorry, PETA stands for People Eating Tasty Animals.
Then again, how DOES goat taste (probably "like chicken").
Posted Thursday 6th September 2007 05:13 GMT
depends entirely on what goat you eat.
Shoot an old mangy feral billygoat in mid rut and it'll taste and feel like boot leather marinated in piss. so the dog gets that stuff. A young yearling doe tastes like a cross between venison and prime lamb, Slightly mild gameiness with good texture and flavour. A young kid 3 months or under tastes like gamey chicken.
They make good roasts :D and are a very lean healthy red meat :D
Posted Thursday 6th September 2007 05:57 GMT
"Fixed some snags" - Yum
"Fix me some snags Bruce, I'm just lighting the barbie!"
"Goat one's OK, Bruce?"
"Yep, mate, that'll do Bruce"
PS: I've actually flown Royal Nepal Airlines quite a few times.
I alwaus wondered what the bloody mary's were made of.
Posted Thursday 6th September 2007 07:10 GMT
This is their standard procedure for fixing electrical faults. You should see what they do when there are problems with the fuel lines...
Posted Thursday 6th September 2007 22:40 GMT
So the Nepalese repair the plane and sacrifice a couple of goats. How is that different from building a boat and calling a priest to say incantations and then breaking a bottle? Not to mention the numerous superstitions around boats, or the fallacious cell phone use ban in planes, until airlines can charge for it. You guys need to get out more I reckon.