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back to article Blighty internet shopping goes ballistic

UK shoppers are abandoning the high street and going online in droves, according to the latest figures from the Interactive Media in Retail Group (IMRG), the industry body. April net sales were up a thumping 55 per cent on last year at £3.47bn, taking the total web-receipts count since 1995 into 12 figures. The IMRG numbers …

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It amazes me...

That the stupidity of some women still allows them to follow a long forgotten instinct, and in fact accentuate that instinct by making it the sole focus of their existence.

I am of course talking about gathering. In the old, old, old days, women did the gathering, you know berries, spuds, and alike, while the men did the hunting deer, antelope, you get the idea.

So although I'm not criticising women for following the instinct of gathering, and only certain women have lost the plot, I am certainly going to criticise them for GATHERING SHOES!!!!

The latent instinct now carries no necessity in our existence, men still do to some degree hunt, this is illustrated in the shopping habits of the earth bound male, a quick in and out, got what I wanted, end of.

No need to browse.

No need to seek the opinion, of the over opinionated shop attendant

It seems it has become socially acceptable in modern years for women to rack up credit card bills equal to the US national debt on shoes, handbags etc... then get it written off with an IVA stating "I was too stupid to stop spending".

What a world we live in.

We could of course send them all hops picking (could become a punishment for those women with shoe related IVA's), they actually get the exact same satisfaction out of picking fruit as they do picking shoes, however, hops is a far more important resource than shoes...

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How the heck...

How can you POSSIBLY buy clothes online? Yeah, the whole "sizes" thing works great in concept, but for anything more complicated than a t-shirt or underwear, you quite simply can't tell what you're getting into. Hell, depending on the manufacturer, line, and probably person stitching the f'ing thing together, the "right size" could be anything from 36 to 46.

And then there's the whole issue of being able to gauge such things as "comfort," or have our governments finally been able to convince us that being comfortable is not best for us?

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