My wife is due to give birth to our daughter at any moment and we have agreed to name her Sophia. Obviously I wanted her second name to be Loren after the popular Italian actress, but my wife has objected on the grounds that our daughter would be ridiculed!?!

I find this hard to believe.

Yours sincerely, Dave Ontopovaman

As a parent I frequently bemoan the total lack of rights that we have, against the rights of our children. But here I think their needs to be some balance. Parents should have the right to call their children anything they want, but the kids should be given the right to appeal once they reach a reasonable age. Failing that they should be able to sue their parents for naming them things like "Fifi Trivibelle" or how ever it was spelt.

One of my Grandma's uncles was apparently christened Hugh Stink.

I am *not* making this up, I swear, I knew the guy...

"Wayne Kerr". I always felt sorry for him, even though I met him after we both got out of Uni... his high-school life must have been Hell.

And with a middle initial of "B", he couldn't get away from Muppet "Bunsen Honeydew" jokes either.

Some parents *really* should be shot. Publicly.

I think Drew Peacock's parents should top the list because they actually managed to do it by accident.

...gets worse!

20 years ago, I worked for this company (Based on the South Coast. Fortunately, I now live in Oulu, a helluvalong way from there now). Yes, the owner gave it that name. Yes, he also knew its implications.

Reason? Film buff. Norman Wayne and Deborah Kerr were his fave actor/actress.

-D'ohhh...

-Andy

Old friend of mine's mother was a dinner lady at a local school who once told us of a little lad there with the surname fanny. Wanna guess his first name?? Aaron..

Aaron Fanny...

Gutted...

...there is a lecturer called Mike Hunt. Apparently he doesn't understand the implications of it either (although on his door he has Michael Hunt, so it could be worse, I guess).

"And if I ever have a son, I think I'm gonna name him Bill or George! Anything but Sue! I still hate that name!"

"Boy Named Sue"

The other side of Drew Peacock would be my sister's long-since ex-boyfriend's brother -

Everard Dick

I kid you not. Last I heard he was banged up, which is hardly surprising in the circumstances.