Just listening to his music makes me gay.

Ref the more traditional definition.

I think the word 'gay' in the English language has become entirely too confusing and ambiguous. The word 'gay' is used to define happiness, homosexuality and as unfashionable. I suggest an alternative: alternating spelling.

The word gay should mean homosexual. We've had it pushed down our throat (no pun intended) as the quick and dirty way of describing homosexuality. An alternate spelling for the word 'happy' would be gaey, as it resembles the old spelling and would still be recognisable as such. Finally, I think that the word which denotes unfashinable objects, behavior or activities should be 'ghey', spelt the "leetest" to satisfy the young people who obviously use it not to denote homosexuality but the fact they're cooler than us old folks. Give them spelling to reflect this, I say.

With this a good article headline in this spelling would read "Gay Elton beats ghey bishop in courtcase for gaey concert in Tobago". Comments, anyone?

- An old fart.

But now I'm just damn miserable.