A nonagenarian German handyman has continued the time-honoured Teutonic tradition of getting stuck to roofs, the Sydney Morning Herald reports. Last year, 59-year-old August Voegl of Jennersdorf, Austria, nailed himself to a roof through his wedding tackle. This appears to have provoked an unnamed 91-year-old from Magdeburg to …
I guessing that if it wasn't for the bitumen, he would be a ex-nonagenarian stain on the pavement. I suggest a coating of non-drying extra-sticky paint on the sides of tall buildings, balconies and bridges, to catch would-be suicidees and unsteady drunks, like flies on a fly paper, to be extracted at the emergency service's leisure.
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